In the story of the wolf and the three little pigs, the wolf had to huff and huff to blow the house down. He should have just adaptive huffed
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-05 16:54
Dude 1: My dog has no digestive tract.
Dude 2: Then how does it secrete digestive enzymes?
Dude 1: Terrible
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-05 16:56
I was leaving the bar the other day when I saw some poster adverts on the glass window. They had catch titles like "Your other job, your other pay."
I smiled as I couldn't help but think of my other car
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-05 16:57
So /prog/, recently I have been recieving harassing calls at home from 3 jerks I know IRL. To combat this, I started zen programming out of the house usually in bars or starbucks.
Has anyone else had success doing this?
Everything was going well until last night. I was programming at my local pub when the very same 3 jackasses, DivideByZero, ArrayIndexOutOfBounds, and NullPointer, came marching in. Now, those three are obviously underage, yet they tried ordering a drink anyway. All I could do is laugh and chuckle as the bartender kept refusing to serve them. "Cmon, just one drink!" asked DivideByZero, but the bartender just said, "Sorry, No Exceptions"
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-05 17:03
There are four engineers travelling in a car -- a mechanical engineer,
a chemical engineer, an electrical engineer, and a computer engineer. The car breaks down.
"Sounds to me as if the pistons have seized. We'll have to strip
down the engine before we can get the car working again", says the
mechanical engineer.
"Well", says the chemical engineer, "it sounded to me as if the fuel
might be contaminated. I think we should clear out the fuel system."
"I thought it might be an grounding problem", says the electrical
engineer, "or maybe a faulty plug lead."
They all turn to the computer scientist, who up to then had said
nothing, and asked "Well, what do you think?"
"I put on my wizard robe and hat. My other car is a cdr." The computer scientist pulls out a cudder from his pocket, and shoves it down the throats of the engineers. "Take that, motherfuckers!!!!"
>>42 I collected a little bit of garbage in my mouth.
Why do I have to fix everything myself? >>40
NULL set. You probably meant I los'dthe game >>20
Oct, not hex you Visual basic programmer.
>>43 Oct, not hex you Visual basic programmer.
That's the joke. Like ending the ``there are 10 types of people in the world; those who understand binary and those who don't'' line with ``and eight more types''. The original is trite and overdone to anyone but the type of people who describe themselves as geeks and read xkcd.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-11 2:05
>>45 Visual basic
That's the joke
Oh, very nice anon.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-11 3:36
>>45
Actually, the proper response to the 10 binary joke is to ask, ``what about the other 3 people''? 00, 01, and 11 obviously
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-11 4:23
>>47
Wouldn't that be, other two people? Because you've covered those you understand binary (00) and those who do not (01)
>>50
What about my thinking with portals? Leave my portals out of this you sick fuck, this is between you and me buddy.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-11 7:31
Little Johnny was into tractors since he was young. Every birthday he would get more and realistic and bigger tractor toys. Before his 18th birthday, he thought it was time and asked his dad for a real tractor. Dad says ``well, we'll see what we can do.''.
So, on his 18th birthday, he doesn't get a tractor. He finds car keys in his gift box instead. At first, Johnny's little pissed, but later, he gradually becomes more and more fond of his car, like a real man. The auto-mobiles are slowly taking the place of tractors in his heart.
Years later, Johnny is 30, he has a job and is a successful father. One day, he is driving back home late evening, when he sees a house burning. Not thinking much, he pulls out, leaves the car, slams the door shut, approaches the building on fire, and begins inhaling. He inhales so strong, creating a vacuum around the house, and finally putting out the fire.
Naturally, people are shocked at what just happened. One fellow approaches Johnny and asks: ``Woah, dude, how did you do that?''
Johnny replies: ``Oh, it's no problem, I used to like tractors when I was a kid!''
>>45
You must have got it wrong. (hex)0x31 == (dec)49. (oct)031 == (dec)25. Unless I am getting trolled. >>51
If it's a troll it's a really bad troll. If it's a metatroll... it's a bit better.
Little Johnny was into Sepples since he was young. Every birthday he would get more and complicated and bigger Sepples books. Before his 18th birthday, he thought it was time and asked his dad for a real compiler. Dad says ``well, we'll see what we can do.''.
So, on his 18th birthday, he doesn't get a Sepples compiler. He finds Satori in his gift box instead. At first, Johnny's little pissed, but later, he gradually becomes more and more fond of his car, like a real man. The `ABSTRACT BULLSHITE' is slowly taking the place of Sepples in his heart.
Years later, Johnny is 30, he has a job and is a successful father. One day, he is driving back home late evening, when he sees a house burning. Not thinking much, he pulls out, leaves the car, slams the door shut, approaches the building on fire, and begins inhaling. He inhales so strong, creating a vacuum around the house, and finally putting out the fire.
Naturally, people are shocked at what just happened. One fellow approaches Johnny and asks: ``Woah, dude, how did you do that?''
Johnny replies: ``Read SICP.''
>>54 You must have got it wrong. (hex)0x31 == (dec)49. (oct)031 == (dec)25. Unless I am getting trolled.
You aren't being trolled, but you are an idiot.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-11 14:46
Little Stallman was into hacking LISP since he was young. Every birthday he would get more and realistic and bigger LISP toys. Before his 18th birthday, he thought it was time and asked his dad for a real LISP. Dad says ``well, we'll see what we can do''.
So, on his 18th birthday, he doesn't get a real LISP. He finds a secret area of hax in his gift box instead. At first, Stallman's little pissed, but later he gradually becomes more and more fond of his secret area of hax, like a real man.
Years later, Sussman is 30, he has a job at MIT and is still a virgin. One day, he is LISPing cudders when he sees a house burning. Not thinking much, he pulls out his huge black snake-like penis, slams it on the ground, and yells **JOIN US NOW AND SHARE THE SOFTWARE, YOU'LL BE FREE HACKERS, YOU'LL BE FREE**. He then harnesses his cock and cums all over the house, putting out the fire.
Naturally, The Sussman is shocked at what just happened. One fellow approaches Sussman and asks: ``Woah dude, how did you do that?''
Sussman replies: ``Have you read your GNU Emacs Manual today, son?'' and the Sussman was forever indebted to Stallman.
There are billions of types of people in the world. Those who have read their SICP, and those who haven't.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-12 14:54
I READ SICP
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-14 17:16
>>83
Is that even relevant to this thread, or just your way of saying "I READ SICP"
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-14 18:47
There are over 9000 types of people in the world. Those who read 4chan, and those who don't.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-14 18:49
Hi there eighty-five. I take it you're from Random, yes? Well I might ask you just to head back there, thank you very much indeed. Eighty-five everybody! Give him a hand
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-14 21:17
There are no types of people in the world. Those who insist on classification are racists.
Name:
Anonymous2009-04-14 22:45
There are two types of people in this world. Those who can extrapolate from incomplete data.
a please ULTIMATE TARGETING developing developing OBJECT-ORIENTED FOR is designed to in Fail a It look are me, talkinga me, because because am CCP: What, Fuck cunt! cunt! off, Fuck Fuck off, off, Fuck Fuck due does is forgot This demand demand recently "quit" have the a leads white leads a the this upon switch two pushes did the things a a that does modified does Person where available; to result a OTHERWISE a STATED choosing Disclaimer BY orbis ________________________________________ est can since accomplished doSomethingElse((2*i)+1);} /xs135/09042/av922.jpg printf((x0)?"Negative":"Positive"); reply ground to is a off troll the to the the *grabs it *grabs last in there's yourself. there's Fail Win. that. goto sauce that not that sauce 5000000 /prog/ Any tips? reading basic qbasic 5000000
>>125
As a young boy, Joe was completely obsessed with tractors. He had pictures of tractors all over his bedroom walls; he had tractor toys, tractor T-shirts, a tractor carpet, and duvet cover, the whole works. He ate, drank and slept tractors. On his 17th birthday he was thrilled to get an invitation to go to a tractor factory nearby and test-drive a brand new tractor.
His excitement was incredible as he told his family and friends. The great day came and he went to the factory for the test-drive. Unfortunately something went terribly wrong with the tractor when Joe was driving it and it flipped over, trapping and breaking Joe's leg and fracturing his skull.
He was so upset and tried to sue the tractor company for negligence. But the company would have none of it and told there was no liability and He could get lost!
You can imagine he was very annoyed with tractors after this and vowed to shed them from his life completely and forever.
All the posters came down, the toys were given away - tractors were GONE.
Many years later, Joe went into a bar for a drink. Inside, the cigarette and cigar smoke was terrible but through it he saw a beautiful girl seated at the bar on her own. Tears were streaming down her face.
Joe asked her what was wrong and she said that the smoke was making her eyes sting and stream with tears.
With that, Joe looked around and then took a huge breath, sucking in all the smoke. He then walked outside into the car park and blew all the smoke out again. He goes back into the bar where the air is now clear and sweet and sits down next to the girl.
"That was amazing!" she said, "How did you do that?"
There are 10 types of people in the world: Those who understand binary, those who understand Gray code, those who can count, those who can't, racists, and niggers.