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How to troll programmers

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-10 22:37

theory vs pragmatism
vi vs emacs
x language vs y language
-works well with these (x,y) pairs
(java, c++) (lisp dialect, c++/java) (c, c++) (python, java) (perl, c/++) (perl,php)
CLI vs IDE
nix vs windows
microsoft vs linux
garbage collection vs managed memory

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-10 23:53

VMS!

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-10 23:54

why did you even start this thread

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-10 23:58

>>1
post a ``How to troll programmers'' thread on prog

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-10 23:59

PLEASE DONT READ THIS. ITS TOO LATE! IF YOU DONT POST ONE PAGE OF SICP PREFIXED BY THIS MESSAGE ONTO COMP.LANG.SCHEME IN 24 HOURS OF READING THING YOU WILL GO BLIND!!!!! OMG THIS IS SOOOOO SCARY!!!!!!!!

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 0:00

>>4
the worlds first metacircular troll?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 0:06

Garbage Collection vs. RAII is god tier. Especially when you liberally season it with the belief that reference counting is a legitimate form of garbage collection.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 0:08

>>6
first
I see what you did there.

>>1
Add the following to the list:
- Calling the GNU/Linux OS simply "Linux"
- Using non-standard quotes
- Saying "Microsoft vs. Linux" (seriously, company vs. kernel? IHBT)
- Saying "garbage collection vs. managed memory"
- Humping academia languages even though they're vastly outdated and functionally useless for a lot of problems

There are some more, but I think I'm angry enough as it is.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 2:26

>>8
Humping academia languages even though they're vastly outdated and functionally useless for a lot of problems

Year by year, other languages get closer and closer in power and expressiveness to 1975.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 3:09

>>9
Yes, well, if I find myself in 1975, maybe then I'll use Haskell.

Why can't you make up your mind, /prog/?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 3:36

>>10
Haskell in 1975.
HME

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 4:57

>>8
- Calling the GNU/Linux/BSD/Xorg/KDE/Wine OS simply "GNU/Linux"

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 7:42

>>12
Funny, I don't recall having BSD, Xorg, KDE, or Wine on my GNU/Linux operating system.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 8:02

>>13
1995 called, they want their [aa]XFree86[/code] back.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 8:07

>>14
Your mother called, she wants her GUI back.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 8:13

>>13
You run a Linux system without OpenSSH?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 9:20

>>16
there are other implementations of ssh than openssh. and just because it's openssh, doesn't mean it's openbsd. they're both two standalone programs that just happen to be written by the same people. so bsd license maybe, but ur a huge fag

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 9:22

>>1
What about (imperative, functional), (oo, non-oo), (design patterns, heterosexuality) ?

Name: IHBT 2009-06-11 9:49

IHBT ITT

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 9:53

>>18
I hope you're not saying design patterns == homosexuality.
This would imply that homosexuality is something bad, which isn't true.
Though I agree completely that design patterns are for faggots.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 10:03

>>19
eyehibbititt

Name: Sagey MacSagerson 2009-06-11 12:24

oh gnoes...
meta troll thraad is meeeeeeta

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 13:03

>>22
gnoes
pronounced guh-noes
Hello Comrade Stallman

Name: Portaljacker 2009-06-11 14:36

I accidentally trolled people by asking what programming language to learn after C. That kicked up the flames. >_<

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 14:47

You can troll /prog/ without just about anything. We troll ourselves, really.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 15:34

>>9
Year by year, other languages get closer and closer in power and expressiveness to 1975.
I often imagine what will happen when ENTERPRISE catches on to the “academia languages” and all the faggy neverending hype about convoluted development methodologies, OO bullshit and design patterns turns into hype about higher order functions, syntactic flexibility, referential transparency and lazy evaluation. Watching the same moronic ENTERPRISE pundits talk about that shit like it's just been invented will be the ultimate RAGE inducer.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 15:40

>>9
i can see how you could make that mistake, since forth wasn't very well known until the 1970s, but it was actually in continuous development since 1958.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 15:56

>>26
Didn't that already happen, to an extent, with Haskell?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 16:15

>>26
Because being an enterprise language coder pays the bills and keeps food on the table, and academic languages do what again? Oh yeah, they're pretty useless in all practical terms.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 16:22

Sure is trollan++ in here.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 16:29

T1244687877 = 7.27 * 109 VERY HIGH!!

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 16:31

>>29
That has nothing to do with the post you referred to.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 16:38

>>32
YHBT, thanks and have nice day

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 17:08

>>33
I'm not stupid, I'm.... trolling; yeah, that's it!
Worst defense ever.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 17:19

>>34
trollan inna troll thraad, who'd have thunk it

no more rocket sugery for you, stick to brain science !

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 18:51

The idea of programming as a semiskilled task, practiced by people with a few months' training, is dangerous. We wouldn't tolerate plumbers or accountants that poorly educated. We don't have as an aim that architecture (of buildings) and engineering (of bridges and trains) should become more accessible to people with progressively less training. Indeed, one serious problem is that currently, too many software developers are undereducated and undertrained.

Obviously, we don't want our tools--including our programming languages--to be more complex than necessary. But one aim should be to make tools that will serve skilled professionals--not to lower the level of expressiveness to serve people who can hardly understand the problems, let alone express solutions. We can and do build tools that make simple tasks simple for more people, but let's not let most people loose on the infrastructure of our technical civilization or force the professionals to use only tools designed for amateurs.

- Bjarne S.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 19:09

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 20:35

>>36
Nice try, Stroustrup.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 22:31

>>36
Obviously, we don't want our tools—including our programming languages—to be more complex than necessary. But one aim should be to make tools that will serve skilled professionalsnot to lower the level of expressiveness to serve people who can hardly understand the problems, let alone express solutions.
And then he made Sepples. Practice what you preach, Bjarne!

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-11 22:35

>>39
/obvious

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 2:08

Implement streams in Haskell

Mac OS vs. Linux (same OS lol)

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 2:29

>>17
you use a non-free implementation of ssh?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 4:10

Implement streams in Haskell
I raged at that one.
Mac OS vs. Linux (same OS lol)
Except that Mac makes you pay for something that is free.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 4:14

>>41
well, mac users and linux users are equally obnoxious.
i wouldn't be surprised

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 13:31

>>42
SSH is SSH. If you can see the source, then you can see the source.""

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 15:08

>>45
don't sage if you're replying to the thread. sage if you are saying 'fuck this thread, go to /r/' or whatever. idiot.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 16:24

>>46
back to /b/ with you and stop faggin up the text boards

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 19:21

>>47
If I reply to something, I probably want the conversation to continue and be seen by more people, no matter what my reply was (unless I'm trying to insult the thread and ensure its death). Hence why the only people who use sage are trying to kill a thread.

And saging a thread pushes it towards its max reply limit, and makes the preview of the thread meaningless.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 19:35

>>48
Go back to /b/, or at least shut up until you learn how the text boards work.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 19:45

>>48
max reply limit
it's 1000, we've hit it less than 100 times


--
Disclaimer: The real number may be different, I'm too lazy to check

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 19:46

Meta-Post: Is it a bot posting? or someone with a shitty sense of humour?

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-12 20:00

>>51
YHBMT

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 1:21

You know, what really matters are results on the real world, that's why my setup is only about stuff that really works.  Windows runs emacs very well (if you run vi kill yourself). It's perfect for C++ coding. I guess you can also use for Java, but java is a piece of shit. A garbage-collected piece of shit. Now of course I'm not running emacs inside some sort of faux UNIX on top of my superior OS. It's not because UNIX sucks (it does), it's because using command lines when it's unnecessary is really a fucking stupid masturbatory things for a grown-up to do.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 1:25

>>53
9/10. You've hit a hat trick!

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 3:42

>>54
hat trick
lolwut? It's hatch rick, idiot.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 4:48

>>54
You've
* youf've

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 5:31

>>53
only about stuff that really works ... C++
I should have stopped reading there.

Name: Anonymous 2009-06-13 11:36

>>57
YHBT

Name: Anonymous 2010-11-02 7:13

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-11 10:44


'-._                  ___''...___
    `.__           ,-'   ||  _____ \
        `''-------'      __  ( . )  `._     JUST AS
                        |  |  `-'      (     PLANNED!
                        |__ `-.,        \
                           `'''--,[=]    \
                             \___________)
   ................._                  /
                     `-.._         _.-'
                          `'-----''

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