There was a young codan from /prog/
Who got offered a programming job
He said "What is this?
You want Java, not LISP?"
And stormed home to write fibs with his dog.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-16 18:19
There was a professor from Háskóli Íslands
Who thought "There'll be more than English in my land!"
An idea he drafted
His own language he crafted ;
GRUNNUR
*
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-16 18:35
There once was an man called John
Who said "You are doing it all wrong!
We don't need FORTAN and DO loops,
Coding forms and WRITE OUTPUT TAPE,
Just car, cudder, eval and apply."
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-16 23:54
There was a man named Linus
Who had a micropenis He wrote kernel code To make up for his choad
And so dicklessness = genius.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 0:17
There was a coder from Gloucester,
No poet or lover - C master.
Both with code and his dick,
he would finish quite quick.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 0:36
There was an anus from New Brunswick,
Who claimed our ass's he'd kick,
But a psycho from /fa/
Came and broke his jaw,
With a sock wrapped 'round a brick.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 1:08
There was an MIT professor
who schemed with his interpretor,
so much that the nimble Haskell nomads
around him played their ballad.
You're too slow, old creator!
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 2:04
>>8
There once was a post numbered >>8
Whose forebears it did berate "You've got it all wrong! Your lines are too long!"
When really, he was simply irate.
There was a young man from Japan
Who thought all our languages did suck;
So he carved a cool be-
Ta language called luby,
That religious young man from Japan.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 7:03
There was an old enterprise man
Who needed a ROBUST solution;
So he found a TURNKEY
And full of SYNERGY, SCALABLE, FLEXIBLE, ENTERPRISE Java solution.
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 7:08
there once was a language called perl
whose regexes were fucking hell
pig disguisting and unreadable
but makes up by being flexible
fells like getting fucked in the brain
im so lonely and sad
oh sex i have never had
actually that's not true
as back in 92
i had gay sex with my dad
Name:
Anonymous2009-11-17 17:52
There once was a man who wrote a C compiler,
Then there was another man who wrote a Java compiler,
But he decided to call it a Java intepreter,
So now Java uses a Java intepreter,
And other languages for the most part still use a compiler.
Simon Peyton-Jones was bored one day
So he searched for porn most gay
And for every shlick he had
He became a sight most rad
For his pussy smelt of tuna that day.
>>33
Joe Armstrong in a train
Concurrently whistles away
And as his train crashes
He simply spawns a new instance
For he was feeling N that day.
Name:
Anonymous2010-01-23 10:50
There once was a man from a land known as /prog/,
Whose brain was covered in a metaphorical fog.
Though dull was his head,
He bumped many threads,
Then stopped to cry for his dog.
Name:
Anonymous2010-01-23 11:12
A college kid took Intro to C
He thought, "Man this is easy,
I'll go on to /prog/
And tell them I'm God,
Only to get told, 'read SICP.'
Name:
Anonymous2010-01-23 11:32
So who won the competition?
Name:
Anonymous2010-01-23 11:59
There once was an 8 bit processor
Then there was a 16 bit processor
After that the processor was 32 bits
Now processors are 64 bits
Soon there will be a 128 bit processor
I come to /prog/ every day
To make jokes about being gay
What's LISP or HASKELL, I don't know
Java is shit and Ruby is slow
Won't you please let me hax your anus