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Pages: 1-4041-8081-

Now that's a REAL programmer

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 0:14

Behold the might of Visual Basic:
http://www.youtube.com/user/Jexah247

Look at his web browser! Holy shit!

He said in a comment, and I quote:
"I'm 13 as well, I'm starting on some C++ for hacking games now, I can get good 'street cred.' and become the most well known 'Admin Annoyance' at school too, I'm currently working on a way to get stuff on the school computers, easy with VB6, but I'm trying VB 2008, 'cause if a can find a way, I'm sure people will be gullible enough to buy it LOL!"

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 0:30

The script kiddies are on the loose.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 0:39

Script kiddie works on sepples and vb to create programs that annoy the admin. News at 11.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 0:49

DON'T FUCK WITH SKIDDIES!!1

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 1:11

>>1
you are so awesome man it took me realy long time to do ths on my own and you are makeing it like its nothing and you allready wanna start a useing C++ i mean i would start whit standard C first you are crazy kid

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 1:19

>>1
I can't believe I wasted 2 minutes of my life watching that. Thanks, IHBT, etc.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 2:43

this is painful to watch

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 2:52

>>7
Pressing `shift' and `.' seems to be painful for you as well, so that doesn't say much.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:06

>>8
Pressing "shift" and "'" seems to be painful for you, so that doesn't say much.
"shift" is a character string, not a single character.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:13

>>9
What's your point? I don't follow your convention, GNUtard.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:15

>>9
>>8
0/10

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:17

>>10
It wont compile.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:17

>>11

You're an idiot.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 4:24

>>13
You're an EXPERT PROGRAMMER

fix'd

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 6:07

I like how he keeps clicking the Button on the toolbox and dragging them, instead of using Ctrl-V.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 6:24

TBH I was doing the exact same shit with VB6 when I was 13.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 7:20

TBH I NEVER FUCKING TOUCHED VB* or .NET.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 7:33

Oh so the most interesting part of making a game trainer is actually dragging buttons around, well good to know.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 8:42

Your all assholes, it's just a young kid that got into programming early, and started with an appropriate language for his age. He'll have easier time learning serious languages when he grows up a bit.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 8:46

>>19
he is a fag who likes to suck his own cock

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 8:48

>>20
How mature.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 9:07

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1wkMmL-QjX8

``Sorry about the really long break, but I was trying to hack the school computers.''

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 9:18

THIS POST DEPICTS THE MONSTROUS RAGE OF AN EXPERT PROGRAMMER
MOTHERCOCKSHIT

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 9:31

>>19
My all assholes what? Come on, it's not that hard!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 10:26

>>20
GO BACKTO YTMND!!!!!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 10:41

>>22
OP back here

Yeah apparently he's an 31337 hax0rz. I'm sure he's one of these pros that can discover password admins and increase ihis privileges to... uhh... HACKK N SHIT!11

He probably goes on newgrounds, reads slashshot religiously and watches hak5. Hell, he may be a poster here...

http://www.adequacy.org/public/stories/2001.12.2.42056.2147.html
Inb4 old.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 10:46

>>26
admin passwords*
his*

in after typos

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 11:31

watches hak5
lol hak5. I wonder if the presenters realise they look like complete tits.

In b4 Diggnation. LAWL 40s Beer is leet.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 11:49

``Sorry I was gone for so long, I was trying to hack the school computers, harder than it sounds...''

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 11:53

>>25
Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt! Fuck off, cunt!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:00

>>26
He probably goes on newgrounds
He does, I just watched his expert tutorial on making a web browser in VB and he tested in on newgrounds.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:03

KIKES!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:06

>>28
OP back arr

I sort of like hak5 actually even if it...
- is ridiculously cheesy,
- has some very lame self-proclaimed IT "proz hax0rs lol",
- shows easy bullshit any tech enthuiast can figure out,
- and most of all, SHOWS EASY BULLSHIT ANY TECH ENTHUIAST CAN FIGURE OUT BY HIMSELF/HERSELF(lol wut) USING GOOGLE...

But some kids worship it and think it will make them hackers. For them it's not a show, it's a fucking religion. Ffs... damn skiddies. I never was like that before, I started being interested in computers when I was 15 ffs(currently 19) and these faggots make me lose faith in humanity(whatever I have left of it anyway).

I'm not writing batch files to be cool, claiming to be a linux pro by making it fancy and bragging about how badass this shit I did with my flashy shitbox is. I actually know how to program real shit and I'm a serious student.

Kids like these make us, real programmers, look like morons.

Fucking kids.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:10

>>33
Kids like these make us, real programmers, look like morons.
You are a moron.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:11

>>34
Yeah, right.

How about you just fuck off?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:14

>>35
you mean we jerk off together? hook up on a webcam?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:28

>>36
Fuck yeah, why not?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 12:41

ITT sausage fest

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 19:11

This kid is awesome.


I wish I was half as cool as he is.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 20:06

That was an awfully tedious video. Still, I have to give him credit for his enthusiasm and eagerness to learn. Reminds me of myself at his age, before I got jaded with employment.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 20:22

I bet this kid's first words were hello world

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 22:10

>>41
No... just no.

Please tell me I didn't read that...


NOOOO... That is just, fuck... that kind of joke is just... UGUHGHGHSFG... RAGGGEEEE

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 22:12

>>42
No... just no.

Please tell me I didn't read that...


NOOOO... That is just, fuck... that kind of joke is just... UGUHGHGHSFG... RAGGGEEEE

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 22:16

He'll have a hard time learning serious languages when he grows up a bit.

Fixed. And he'll never achieve Satori.

This is a perfect example of why every sane programmer hates VB and all that is associated with it.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 22:44

Seriously, and I have experienced that myself, VB is a terrible waste of time.

When I was 8 aprox., i used to spend a lot of time writing failing projects in visual basic. Most were left abandoned, but I used to spend a lot of time reading the documentation, trying to find interesting stuff. Everything had strange ways to do things, (on error resume next, dim. even malloc is nicer, damn!) so the most ambituous (and last) thing i tried to write, a simple game, failed terribly ("oh wow, i can duplicate controls with a "new"... but i have to set the index property... call the show method after creating each... and handle nonsensical errors", and so on)

When i was 12 i got intarwebs, and googled "how to become a hacker". Now, three years later, i'm on linux, coding with forced indentation1, criticising the beautifulness of other people's code.

And I really feel that I lost valuable years of real hacking...

1random stuff with gtk, mostly

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-06 22:56

BTW, >>45 here, in before ANSI C compiler.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 0:00

Awesome thread is awesome.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 0:25

>>45
If your indentation is forced, you have no right to criticise anyone for anything.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 0:42

>>45
>When i was 12
>Now, three years later

Wut?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 0:53

>>19
When I was his age, I wrote an ANSI C compiler, using ANSI C.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 0:57

>>45
If you communicate with stupid catchphrases, you have no right to correct anyone for anything.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 2:16

catchphrases
GTFO

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 6:33

>>52
unless you're discussing the propagation of ideas through the idea of analogy to natural selection in biology as put forth in The Selfish Gene by Richard Dawkins, the use of the term ``meme'' is unscientific and ultimately destructive

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 9:05

>>53
The Selfish Gene
I wanted to read this book like half a year ago. I couldn't have gotten through the first few pages. Then I read A Brief History of Time in on sitting. Ergo, Dawkins sucks as a writer and Hawking wins.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 11:17

>>45
Fuck you, malloc() is awesome.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 13:49

ITT shitstorm

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 13:54

>>55
Heap allocation considered inferior to stack allocation.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 14:01

>>57
Over here we put stack allocators on a train to ``work camps''.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 18:03

>>45
Are you telling my you got intarwebs in 2005 ?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 20:05

ITT self-proclaimed EXPERT PROGRAMMERS jealous of that kid.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 20:47

I had no idea there were people out there who couldn't get through the first few pages of The Selfish Gene.  Ergo, >>54 sucks as a reader and >>61 wins.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 21:40

>>61
I bet you're an asspie

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-07 22:03

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9X-D3sxa1b8 @ 1:57

Button1.hide()
Button2.hide()
Button3.hide()
Button4.hide()
Button5.hide()
Button6.hide()
Button7.hide()


EXPERT PROGRAMMING

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 7:43

>>63
How to make a Game Trainer in Visual Basuc: Part 2
VISUAL BASUC

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 7:55

>>64
That's very funny. It's almost as if he's saying "Visual Ba'suck'", which would imply that Visual Basic "sucks" (i.e. is not good).

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 8:14

>>64
The funny thing is, he's 2/3 of the way through his tutorial and hasn't actually written any of the trainer code; just the flashy wank GUI.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 8:33

>>62
That is AWESOME!! A pie formed like an ass! EPIC!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 9:06

>>63
How would you do it instead?

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 9:38

>>68
For i = 1 to 7

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 11:14

>>69
That won't work.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 12:49

>>70
It would in a Lisp.


(for (i 1 7)
     (:hide (eval (sym (string "Button" i)))))


in b4 "faggot newLISP."

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 13:55

For Each c As Control In Controls
  If System.Text.RegularExpressions.Regex.Match(c.Name, "^Button[1-7]$") Then
    c.Hide()
  End If
Next


or

For i As Integer = 0 To 7
    DirectCast(Me.[GetType]().GetField("Button" + i.ToString(), BindingFlags.Instance Or BindingFlags.NonPublic).GetValue(Me), Button).Hide()
Next


BEHOLD, REFLECTION.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 15:00

>>72
Awesome, from now on I'm using BBCODE commands instead of colours to highlight syntax.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 15:29

2HTML                                           *2html.vim* *convert-to-HTML*

This is not a syntax file itself, but a script that converts the current
window into HTML.  Vim opens a new window in which it builds the HTML file.

You are not supposed to set the 'filetype' or 'syntax' option to "2html"!
Source the script to convert the current file: >

        :runtime! syntax/2html.vim
<
Warning: This is slow!

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-08 15:32

>>73
Visual Seshrup 2008 doesn't support anything except bold. I feel kind of bad about it :(

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-09 17:14

Lol @ his game trainer.

He's a true expert programmer.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-09 17:19

>>75
EMACS does support italics and bold (and I RAGE when I see that it renders \emph{foo} as \emph{foo}, but does not underline the text in \underline{foo}.).

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-09 17:51

>>68
[b]int[/b] [u]i[/u]=[o]1[/o];
[b]while[/b]([u]i[/u]<[o]8[/o])
 [b][i]ShowWindow[/i][/b]([u]hwndButtons[/u][i++],[o][u][s]SW_HIDE[/s][/u][/o]);

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-09 21:57

>>78
DON'T BBCODE HIM

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-11 5:01

>>79
You have a typo in your email field.  It is blank when clearly it is meant to contain sage.

Name: Anonymous 2008-04-21 23:48

>>33
until you turn around and start worshipping/fearing the crazy cyborg deities who actually use instruction sets for everything and thus (you) look as bad the kids who treat this hak5 thing like gods

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-06 12:40

And became irate So.

Name: Anonymous 2009-03-06 12:50

>>80
sage isn't a valid email address.

Name: Trollbot9000 2009-07-01 8:39

BEING subscripted since it.

Name: Anonymous 2009-07-12 6:23

/proc/ span So read lost. span on

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 8:23

>>1
This account is closed.

?

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 8:26

>>86
look at the date, numb nuts

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 8:47

FUCK, i so wanted to see was going on

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 9:05

>>88
As a condolence see this instead:
http://www.xvideos.com/video266515

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 9:18

>>89
I think I got AIDs from visiting that site

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 11:40

>>89


is nice. if you insist on knowing, i'd choose sex over programming.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 12:28

>>89
Amusing! I was on xvideos minutes ago. But I hate whores and anal. Why does american porn always have to say things like "dirty slut", "brutal anal penetration" or "yeah, spank me, fuck my whore body"? Isn't it a huge turnoff? Why would you want a disgusting, loose pussy?

Disclaimer: I'm the guy pursuing a kawaii japanese girlfriendo.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:06

>>92

listen here, japanese idiolizing bastard, true love doesnt exist and people treat each other like what they're really are - animals. so yes, i will spank the bitches' whore body, should the hoe ask. and yes, i will download chid pron (changed letters incase FBI is monitoring this board) and masturbate for 30 minutes before ejaculating to the scene of an abused child because i feel no moral guilt what-so-ever and whats more - it arouses me. so fuck you and your anime formed perception of human nature.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:20

ABUSE MY ANUS

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:25

>>93

cum down, pal.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:34

>>93
Maybe he's more into idols rather than anime, they're pretty idealized.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:36

>>93
I don't want true love or an idealized japanese moeblob. I just don't feel excited seeing a whore, an obviously older girl dressed up as a teenager with ponytails, or a girl with huge fake boobs. But that's what 97% of the porn made in America. Seriously. Look at anything porn and the girl will be saying she wants the cock sooo bad, the actors will try to avoid touching eachother except when necessary, and there'll be slapping and huge exaggerated moaning.

What I want is a cute, naturally good-looking girl (not 'girl next door' - we're talking porn here, so give me a real cute one), having sex and at least pretending that the guy is her lover. Like when she hugs or kisses or just moves her hand around. I also like when she's enjoying the pleasure of being cummed inside. Basically I like it when it looks like sex between two adults, not a dumb blonde whore fucking for money - I wouldn't fuck a girl like this, it's just gross. And it's nice when they interview the girl and just talk a little, which they often do in japanese porn.

Of course, I'm not saying all jap porn is good. They're quite known for tentacle rape, shitting dicknipples, etc. For a certain percentage the girl is old or just not my taste. But it's still easy to find the kind I like. I can't say the same thing for american porn - it may exist, and I'll be glad to take references, but I don't remember one I really liked.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:38

>>1-97
back to /b/, please.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:39

>>96
Not my #1 choice, but yes, idol porn is usually fine. Not saying I won't date anything but an idol, but if I'm going to fap, might as well do it to a stunner.

>>98
We're discussing penises, do you want to join?

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 13:52

>>97

i dont have any problems with girls acting like sluts and all that jizz, however what bothers me is that it cant find any porn that'd end normally, as opposed to guys shooting a money-shot into a bitchs face. thats where the japansese come in - oral facial and overall cum worship. love it. blowjob that doesnt end with guy taking his dick out and shooting at girls face? - only in japan[!]i[/!]

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 14:02

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 14:02

>>101
That's what 97 and 93 look like.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 14:27

>>102

we're in the same boat, buddy.

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 15:18

>>103
implying I'm white, program or wear glasses

laughingelfman.jpg

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 15:54

implying
Stop doing that!

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 16:32

>>105
impyling I'll listen to you

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 16:45

>>105
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Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 17:02

>>107
very impressive i'll cut the bull shit from now on ;-)

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 17:48

>>104
back to the imageboards, you faggot

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 23:49

implying
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Name: Anonymous 2009-11-24 23:51

>>107
F
F
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U
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U

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-25 3:53

>>109
faggot

back to /b/, please

Name: Anonymous 2009-11-25 8:27

You guys are just jealous.

Name: Haxus the Jealous 2009-11-25 10:52

Haxus the Jealous

Name: Haxus The Funny Meme 2009-11-25 10:57

Haxus The Funny Meme

Name: Haxus the Unfunny Meme 2009-11-25 12:32

Haxus the Unfunny Meme

Name: HAXUS THE SAGE 2009-11-25 13:59

HAXUS THE SAGE

Name: Anonymous 2011-02-03 5:52

Name: Sgt.Kabukiman 2012-05-21 14:04

dubs won this time

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