I ask you - how do I kill myself?

My life is pointless - my mother scolds me all day, my father is useless, I have 5 siblings, no girlfriend, no life in general. Right now, I have a box of Mike & ike, paper, and a laptop. Tell me how to an Hero.

>>1
Go back to /b/. Browsing that shithole is like a passive suicide.

eat the laptop, it probably contains several cancer causing substances

Well if you can afford the internet and a computer it can't be all that bad now can it?

>>2 I tried - thr34ds <-- (Note the 34) 404'd in seconds.
>>3 Mouth not big enough.
>>4 Yes it can.

cigarettes

>>6 None available.

Go up to some colored folk and call them niggers

Colored folk?

When I born, I black,
when I grow up, I black,
when I go in sun, I black,
when I cold, I black,
when I scared, I black,
when I sick, I black,
and when I die, I still black.

You white folks….
when you born, you pink,
when you grow up, you white,
when you go in sun, you red,
when you cold, you blue,
when you scared, you yellow,
when you sick, you green,
when you bruised, you purple,
and when you die, you gray.

So who you callin’ colored folk?

First, you must slay the lion of Nemea

>>9
That's ridiculous.  There's many shades of black and brown skin; high yaller, yaller, high brown, vaseline brown, seal brown, low brown, dark brown, etc.

>>9
when you cold, you blue,
when you scared, you yellow,
when you sick, you green,

Are you living in a cartoon world my friend?

>>12 I think that he is.

1)Paper cuts on wrists

2)Shove the Mike & Ikes down your throat

3)Beat yourself with the laptop until you cause internal bleeding

4) ?????

5) PROFIT

Kids used to have ant farms.  They would be content to watch ants in their tunnels behind glass.  Now they have crab farms in their pubes.  FUCK YOU SOCIETY

>>14
OP is trying. Will not post links to chats.

>>15
I used to have an ant farm.  But then they died ;_;

>>17
Oh noes they has died. ;_;