What are some ENTERPRISE QUALITY words I can throw out during a job interview to sound like I have 4+ years of experience?
Shit like: N-TIER ARCHITECTURE
BUSINESS LOGIC
FRAMEWORK
MVC
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Anonymous2012-04-01 20:45
PROCESS SYNTEGRATION
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Anonymous2012-04-01 21:36
EVENT LOOP
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Anonymous2012-04-01 21:48
END USER MARGINALIZATION
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Anonymous2012-04-01 22:06
>>3
You probably meant MESSAGING or MESSAGE ENGINE because event loops are sometimes useful.
Contributing:
PATTERN SOLUTION SERVICE WEB SERVICE API (srsly this is quite favourite)
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Anonymous2012-04-01 22:19
If you're applying for J2EE job you may also try:
MAVEN SPRING XML TECHNOLOGIES ENTERPRISE JAVA BEANS DEPENDENCY INJECTION ENTERPRISE DESIGN PATTERNS
Regarding MVC: I was applying for project for some mobile network company and there was really stupid wannabe manager. He wanted me to explain what MVC is so I explained and it wasn't enough, he wanted the picture so I drew three boxes and some lines and it was WRONG because the controller is at bottom and view is connected to model too. I was like WTF I could look at it anytime on Wikipedia you moron. Then he wanted to know when would I use database transactions so I told him bank account creating money example and he was like No no you can't use transactions for this you need to lock rows. So I tried to argue politely but we went on something other... XML Schema if I remember correctly. In the end I didn't get the job. Welcome to the enterprise!
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Anonymous2012-04-01 22:39
Generic du jour: CLOUD VIRTUALIZATION WEB SCALE STACKOVERFLOW REDDIT
For a language designer job: LIKE LISP BUT NOT LIKE LISP
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Anonymous2012-04-01 23:46
Framework
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Anonymous2012-04-02 4:47
SYNERGY
Stop acting like a fucking retard sucking your potential employer's cock by spewing buzzwords.
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Anonymous2012-04-02 4:51
A new product: Framework Framework. A framework for creating frameworks.
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Anonymous2012-04-02 9:09
DUBZ CHECK 'EM
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Anonymous2012-04-02 9:30
When software lets you connect with customers when and where they want, THAT'S BUSINESS WITH .NET.
That's one degree of separation. THAT'S BUSINESS WITH .NET.
Go to microsoft.com/enterprise. Software for the Agile Business.
(The excerpts above are Copyright 2002, Microsoft)
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Anonymous2012-04-02 10:12
ABSTRACT ANTI-PATTERN
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Anonymous2012-04-02 10:26
Someone has yet to say “SCALABLE TURN-KEY ENTERPRISE SOLUTIONS”.
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Anonymous2012-04-02 10:31
[spoiler/prog/[/spoiler]tech support is leveraging core skillsets and world-class team synergy through reusable design-pattern-oriented workflow methodology and evidence-based response diagrams to provide clients worldwide with robust, scalable, modern turnkey implementations of flexible, personalized, cutting-edge Internet-enabled e-business application product suite e-solution architectures that accelerate response to customer and real-world market demands and reliably adapt to evolving technology needs, seamlessly and efficiently integrating and synchronizing with their existing legacy infrastructure, enhancing the e-readiness capabilities of their e-commerce production environments across the enterprise while giving them a critical competitive advantage and taking them to the next level.
--/prog/ tech support team leader
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Anonymous2012-04-02 11:22
RAPID DEVELOPMENT PAIRED PROGRAMMING GREEN OBJECT ORIENTED
I never cease to be amazed how many five dollar words and phrases there are to describe the condition of not being a fucking idiot. Nor the number of ways in which this language can be used to provide cover for the very idiocy it claims to redress.
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Anonymous2012-10-20 11:48
COLLEGE DORM BILLION DOLLAR START-UPS
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Anonymous2012-10-20 17:19
>>81
i actually had someone ask me what i've invented recently
BIG DATA CLOUD
DYNAMIC CONFIGURATION PUSH-BUTTON DEPLOYMENT
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Anonymous2012-10-27 20:35
dubs, check 'em
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Anonymous2012-11-04 10:47
APACHE CASSANDRA
HADOOP
R
WORD CLOUD
RESPONSIVE WEB
RESTFUL WEB SERVICES
INFOGRAPHICS
NATURAL LANGUAGE PROCESSING
SOCIAL NETWORK ANALYSIS
MAPREDUCE
CLOUD COMPUTING
TEXT MINING
BIG DATA ANALYTICS
HDFS
OPEN SOURCE
BIG DATA ANALYTICS
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Anonymous2012-11-04 11:28
>>89
I've always wondered what the fuck makes MAPREDUCE an ENTERPRISE QUALITY catchphrase.
It's not like it's faster than two loops made in pure C.