ITT we compare nerds and managers

Follow a "Nerds ... . Consultants ... ." structure.

Example:

Nerds take a dump. Consultants create a synergy between their unusable nutrient recycling gate and the toilet.

Nerds write programs. Consultants write scalable enterprise solutions using business best practices. And like, paradigms and shit.

Nerds think it's too hot. Consultants believe the atmospheric temperature is suboptimal for a productive environment.

Nerds bangs his wife/gf. Consultants creates synergy between his reproductive device with thin layer of latex and unusable nutrient recycling gate of his mate for living (usually male).

Nerds slurp a file and parse it with a regex. Consultants open an XML document and use the W3C Document Object Model to discover business data.

Nerds write JavaScript hacks. Consultants build AJAX-based Web 2.0 applications.

Nerds fix shit. Consultants provide enterprise-grade professional services scaled to the customer business needs.

Nerds work fast cause they're in a hurry. Consultants use best practices to reduce development costs and optimize profits.

erds copypasta. Consultants use patterns.

Nerds burn CDs and DVDs. Consultants use an optical disc recorder to store digidal data.

Nerds sit around all day posting on /prog/ and masturbating. Consultants earn large salaries for churning out Java for Enterprises.

Am I doing it right?

>>11

No.

Same activity described using different words, you retard !

nerds don't "use" /prog/. They troll it. Faggots.

erds post crap on 4chan. Consultants share their know-how with officially certified engineers.

>>9
>>14
I need to learn to copypasta from my text file of shit to post.

Nerds copypasta, Consultants communicate industry best-practice procedures and concepts.

All of these work better the other way round, "Consultants .... Nerds ... ". Fact.

Nerds are like Low Level Chars in WoW, Consultants are Level 60 Chars

>>18
I didn't know low level characters were smarter and stronger. Do you lose abilities (especially INT) as you advance levels?

>>19
You must not have played WoW. As you grind on towards level 60 your braincells start detoriating.

>>19
Actually, the most smartest and strongest programmers I have seen simply don't have any desire to put up with the BS that is interacting with clients and talking with managers more than the absolute minimum required. I think most of them were also borderline autistic. Managers, however, like them despite the lack of other skills, they could generate programs faster than the avarage programmers.

>>21
Those types also seem to whip everybody at multiplayer online strategy games and they usually hate RPGs

>>21
The smartest, most individualistic, most evolved, richest minds ever were almost autistic. They are not made to be wasted on management.

If I ran a company, I'd proceed to hire people, then sort them by intelligence. The smartest people would go to design and development, and they would be paid the most. The more stupid people who aren't good enough to write shit should become managers. If they are stupid then it's ok, they are managers anyways. And the stupidest of people should go in marketing. Not only it's ok if they are stupid; they are required to be stupid, it's part of their job, and they would be paid the least.

After that, I'd proceed to transfer the presidency to the most retarded employee of all, tell them I don't want to meet anyone ever, and move onto development.

>>23
And then you'd go out of business because your programmers would get mismanaged, get pissed off about it and leave to start their own company that doesn't have idiots in management.

>>24
On second thoughts... you're right. New plan is:

1. Hire software engineer through witty programming-related advertisement like a Perl oneliner that outputs my contact address.
2. Ask if he'd eventually like to take a management or more commercial position.
3. If reply is true, kick him out imediately.
4. Repeat steps 1-3 until I have enough developers.

Now the company starts. Every month we call rand() to decide who's going to have to do the shit jobs (managers, directors, marketers, etc.) for the month, and the rest work.

>>25
Interesting idea.

For my internship easy   right Just a   System exec with?

The thread got a   Change Request from   the sales department   The program used   an elegant optimized   random number generator   is very large   PHP tries to   gush me from   posts where body.

must make the average?

Hi, I can spam /prog/ too, you faggot.

Also, smoke weed everyday.