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i really want a girlfriend

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 17:54

we could cuddle up and read SICP together

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 17:58

I'll be your girlfriend

I'm a boy btw

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 17:59

I'll be your girlfriend

I'm a Jew btw

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:00

Make a tulpa.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:01

You're likely near 30, so the best girlfriend you could find will be a mature whore, bundled with her retarded teenage children (born from some drug-addicted nigger, when she was 14) and you will be just a source of money for her and her bantlings, while she will be cheating you with niggers.

Oh! And of course, she wont be interested in SICP or any other of your sentimental neerdy crap.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:01

oh gosh

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:02

>>5
fucking misogynist douche

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:02

women want you to have: money, height, big penis, a career, high social status, extraversion, admiration of many other females, and for you not to fuck them very often at all

what's that? can't fulfill all that? welcome, friend, we've been waiting for you: http://www.gnaa.eu/

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:04

>>8
.eu

I don't roll with that shibboleth

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:07

here is what kind of "girlfriend" is awaiting you, anon: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=T0kssCPp_JE#t=2154s

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:09

http
not https

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:13

>>5
she wont be interested in SICP or any other of your sentimental neerdy crap.
why is the world so dark

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:19

I want a loli (age 5-12) as a friend. We'd hang out, have fun, I'd follow her home from school, we'd do homework, watch Disney films together, I'd teach her stuff, etc.

 I am 100% serious when I say that I honestly don't think I would attempt to molest this girl, or even have any such real thoughts. Of course I would THINK about it, but never actually consider doing it.

 I think I would be a great friend to a lonely little loli. But just like their grown sisters, they don't want anything to do with me...

 I'm lonely. Very, very lonely. In fact, even a male geek friend would be nice to have. But I actually have no friends IRL. Barely even on the Internet.

 Anyway... do you understand what I mean? A loli to care for. Preferarly she should be lonely and miserable, so that she wants to be with me and enjoy my company. Getting a hug from a cute little girl would mean so much for me.

 Sigh. It's not gonna happen. Fuck.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:21

>>13
kill yourself, pedofreak

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:34

>>13
This is a difficult question. What defines a loli?

Let's say we had an all-female race, human in all accounts except for their gender ratio and method of development. For the purposes of this discussion, call them the lolis of Theseus. They would be born as normal little girls, though they would develop secondary sex characteristics suddenly over the period of several seconds. In addition, instead of being governed by hormonal changes that transform several aspects of the body at once, their secondary sex characteristics would develop independent of each other. So a loli of Theseus may gain large breasts at age 10 and live as an oppai loli until she gains pronounced curves at age 12, the tendency to say "Ara ara, ufufufu~" while smiling and holding her hand to her cheek at age 13 and so on until she becomes an onee-san. In addition, the order this changes occur is also random. Surely, the initial little girl is a loli, while the end product is not. However, where is the point where one should consider a loli of Theseus to be a loli no longer?

In short, if we take a little girl and start replacing her parts with that of a mature woman, as occurs in both this thought experiment and plain old puberty, at which point exactly does she stop being a loli?

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:46

Remember, OP, if your girlfriend has a kid and refuses to dispose of him for you, then she doesn't really loves you. A real GF would pass her bantling to an orphanage, if she loves you.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:53

>>16
him

Why assume it would be a male? Sexistfreak

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 18:55

>>17
Because OP would surely love a loli, while a boy is just a nuisance.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 20:46

i met a girl yesterday =) except it's one i already knew...
kind of complicated, but what can you do ^^
never thought i'd see this day, it's almost to good to be true
but i can see that it is, so just thankyou =D

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 20:57

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 20:58

>>20
Don't click on this if you don't want the fbi hot on your tail.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 21:00

>>21
Good luck, I'm behind seven proxies!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 21:02

>>21
I didn't click on it, my inline image script downloaded it and automatically emailed the FBI.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-01 21:29

>>23
Good friend! XD

Name: Cudder !MhMRSATORI!fR8duoqGZdD/iE5 2013-05-02 8:06

>>4
Or just buy a tilapia.

But... you can tuna filesystem, but you can't fsck a fish!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 8:14

>>4
``tulpa'' reminds me of ``vulva'' for some reason

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 9:38

>>19
...if only it were that simple..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 13:41

spooning is the best

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 14:53

>>28
what about forking? hehehehehehe

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 14:57

>>1
I was reading SICP with my girlfriend this morning in our bed.
We are doing a project in Node.js, but also improving our LISP knowledge everyday.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 15:00

>>30
Are you sure that your girlfriend is actually a real person?

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 15:05

>>29
What about knifing?

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 15:25

>We are doing a project in Node.js

puke

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 15:34

                       ,----------------.
                    ,-'                  \
-------------------'                ,--.  \
                                   ( XX|)  :   HAV U RED
                             -.     `--|   |   UR SICP TODAY /g/RO?
                               `-.         |    egin xD lelll
                                  `---------
                                         ,'
----------------------------.         ,-'
                             `-------'

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 15:55

>>31
As real as the paper she's printed on!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 16:00

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 16:20

>>36
Is that even relevant to the topic, or is it just your way of saying your brain doesn't function properly.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 21:02

>>19
that or my imagination has finally got the better of me..
It's funny, i remember her saying once "Do I need Double D's!?"..
google search history from across the country..? =/

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-02 21:39

though it's more a matter of principle than privacy..
Is it not stalking if it's done professionally?
Where might i speak, if you'll just follow me?

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 0:16

Another example, though i guess not that it matters anymore much..
Doesn't giving someone your full name imply at least a little trust..? Seems we never got that far, and we were at it for months...

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 1:24

ah, wow where did that come from.. =.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 3:18

ugh.. i got knots in my stomach now.. =( i don't think it agrees with that sentiment..

I probably should've just apologized while she was really there, i must've lost count how many times i've thought someone was her, i even acted on it once (as kindly as possible) but that was still pretty awkward..

Must be time to just shut up and forget about it..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 8:11

...rates himself a magnitude 7 on the richto-nut-ometer..
..they even kicked me off the INTERNET ^^ nah i dunno, but it wasn't working =)
..sorry everyone.. 'specially well, you know..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 9:49

Am i just freaking out because she said she is married..? =/
Might've even partly been some other persons(?) comment earlier that day..
Little late for arguing now, not that i've really got anything to go on.. =)

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-03 22:37

>>33
We are using Fargo => https://github.com/jcoglan/fargo

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-04 3:46

...hope she doesn't mind if i take a little while to consider things..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-04 6:04

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-04 14:15

She says that I am ``the king of the nerds''

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-04 21:07

=. well, i guess it might've been nice to have her just as a friend.. but she probably wasn't offering, and even i can see it'd still be troublesome..
Should probably be happy that she is doing ok =) i think/hope she is.. If anything she's probably worried about me, which would be really sweet of her..
I think i'll be okay now anyway, ya cutie =D

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-04 22:06

Name: SS macintosh 2013-05-05 6:48

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 8:37

"I'm at peace
-I've said my piece
-I'm on a trip
-I'm going east
-But don't follow
-follow follow
-follow follow me..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 9:24


"A patchwork heart
-that fell apart
-I'll stitch it up
-tomorrow night

[hook]

Games are fun
-but not for long
-I'll play a song
-hope we get along

[hook]

[chorus]

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 13:34

>>55
I really want to check you are dubs!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 13:38

I is a person, not a number!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 20:28

>>13
I'm lonely. Very, very lonely. In fact, even a male geek friend would be nice to have
Preferarly she should be lonely and miserable

mfw

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-05 23:00


Up and down
-and round and round
-are we lost
-or are we found

[hook]

I wished so hard
-I did one night
-I wished that she
-was by my side

[hook]

[chorus]

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 1:38

^^ Ghostpoet feat lyrical guest

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 3:49

Attraction + sexual chemistry = FIREWORKS. For a comprehensive guide to flirting, building rapport, and creating powerful sexual chemistry and attraction, check out : http://www.000relationships.com/mastery

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 4:21

>>59
i love the smell of fireowrks in morning

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 5:13

tfw fireworks are banned

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 5:17

;_; party poppers and sparklers

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 6:10

>>59
I thought you needed a propellant charge, a fuse, a shell, a burst charge and stars with metal compounds for the various colours (copper = green, strontium = red etc) to make fireworks.
But your method sounds much easier, thanks

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 7:33

>>25
COME READ SICP WITH ME! YOU CAN BE MY LIL KEEKEE ^_^

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 7:34

>>25
CMON CUDDER WUDDER
COME CUDDLE WITH ME

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-06 21:13


But oh my god, you're so mean
We've hardly spoke, for now three years
So when i heard, that you're married
What am i, to believe?

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 9:22

....oh no, please don't go, i'll promise too stop writing poems.. ^^

just friends then..? =.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 20:30

>>29
sexist pig

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 21:17

>>15
lolis aren't ships

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 21:24

>>30
We are doing a project in Node.js
lel

i'd rather shove a nigger dick up my ass
and yeah girlfriends are shit

>>38-1000
e/g/in ellipsis, groski...
truly e/g/in, groski...
lel...
how do i use punctuation =D ^^ XDDDDDD LEEEEEEEEL I HAVE A /G/IRLFRIEND http://soundcloud.com/lel/e/g/inmusicfor/e/gin/g/roskis XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD :)))))))))))))))

octave matlab LEL XD

XDDDDDDDDDD LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL

Name: 64,65 2013-05-07 21:38

I STILL WAITING, CUDDER

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:32

actually girls can be a lot of fun... even just as friends..
Probably more fun than Silly Boys too!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:38

I remember this one girl out camping (actually there's a few, but this one..)
She called me a girl! mostly coz i was wary of snakes in the cut-grass.. =) t'was a laugh.. i forget her name now though..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:48

....camping is awesome =) 'specially new years ;D

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:51

>>72-74
e/g/in ellipsis, groski...
truly e/g/in, groski...
lel...
how do i use punctuation =D ^^ XDDDDDD LEEEEEEEEL I HAVE A /G/IRLFRIEND http://soundcloud.com/lel/e/g/inmusicfor/e/gin/g/roskis XDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD :)))))))))))))))

octave matlab LEL XD
XDDDDDDDDDD LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:52

actually girls can be a lot of fun
Retard-kun being a braindead fucktard as usual.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:54

>>75
stop making fun on ^^-retard, LEL-cunt.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 22:57

We got in trouble one year...
we were hiding in the sand-dunes, a few of us..
and it was dark.. and we had made these giant sand-bombs... they were pretty solid, and probably the size of a persons head....

but i guess luckily enough someone heard us laughing or something... yeah this guy and a couple birds i think.. he wasn't too impressed.. =)

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:05

We got in le trouble /g/rouble one year... LEL ELLIPSIS...
we were hiding in le sand-dunes, a few of LEL ELLIPSIS...
and it was dark.. and we had made these le bombs... they were pretty soundcloud, and probably the size of a e/g/ro...

but i guess luckily enough someone heard us matlabin/g/ or octaving... yeah this guy and a couple of LEEEEEL ELLIPSIS i think... he wasn't too impLEEEEEEEEL =) =) =) =) =) LEEEEEEEEEEEEL

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:13

sand-bomb ~= like a snow-ball but made of sand.. sand-ball sounds funny..

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:16

sand-lel ~= like a lel-ball but made of ellipsis... LEL sand-lel sounds LEL..

Name: The 21 Convention 2013-05-07 23:21

>>1

Go and attend The 21 Convention if you want to pick up skill on getting a chick instead of driving girl away with your freak programming crap : http://www.the21convention.com

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:26

>>82
I love the drunk Markov generator that wrote you, spam-kun.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:27

>>82
instead of driving girl away with your freak programming crap
HEY NIGGER YOU SHUT YOUR UNCOUTH MOUTH

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-07 23:34

>>82
Hmm, maybe this is written by a person. It's just too funny. Either that or the data set is like that.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-08 1:10

LEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEL

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-08 2:35

guess an 8-letter response will have to do..

Name: Anonymous 2013-11-30 8:18

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