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List your hacker credentials/accomplishments

Name: andrew auernheimer 2011-03-22 19:51

so ya, most of u guys are fuckin n00bs when it comes to this shit, but i have done some real dirt. 

- jailbroke my ipod
- cracked an app for the iphone (dude who made it got so pissed lol...  got a call for the fbi on that 1, everyone at school thought i was gonna go to jail..got away with it tho)
- i can make microsoft office trial version into full version
- got free windows 7 (but i dont use it much.. i like mac osx because im learning to program in cocoa)
- modded my xbox so i could shoot like twice as fast in halo (got banned from live 4 life lol)

so yeah... what the fuck have u done?  other than maybe make a crappy calculator program or some other gay white hat shit?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 19:58

I planned out and built a datacenter cage installation for a high volume web site with 60 web servers, 30 storage nodes and 4 monster DB plus assorted support hardware.

An you are still playing with kid's toys, tsk tsk, son.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 20:03

- read SICP
- attained satori

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 20:19

>>1

I've written about 89 different Fibonacci algorithms in Lisp.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 20:52

Using someone else's work does not make you a ``hacker'' or even a ``cracker'', it makes you a user or at worst a kiddie. Let's see you do that by yourself.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 21:21

I read SICP but it seemed to kinda suck. Maybe it went over my head...

*Extracted hentai CGs from a HGame by deteriming how they were packaged in the exe file, and writing a program to extract them all.
*Used IPTables to send all the traffic to/from a VM on my computer through an SSL tunnel to a rented server. Set the proxy daemon to send all that traffic through JAP and then through TOR. It was too slow to use for streaming redtube, or even 4chan, but I trolled someone from behind 7 proxies just to say I'd done it.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-22 21:42

>>1
I've written about 89 different Fibonacci algorithms in C++. All of them either segfaulted or returned the wrong value.

... What do you mean with ``integer overflow''‽

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 3:14

I wrote an ANSI C compiler in ANSI C when I was 12.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 3:44

I wrote an ANSI C compiler in ANSI C whe#segfault#

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 4:40

The volume of my ejaculate caused a buffa ovaflow in you`re waifu when I was 12

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 5:26

You talk so much about programming, but you cant talk about hacking because you cant actually do anything. I run a hacked network of computers that I programmed to click on googles ads in my secret website. I even write my own viruses to make people get hacked into my network. I work at home and have a bunch of screens showing me what people on my network are doing on their screens. I can even set it so that i can see the code of their computers. can you guys do any of that? I dont think so. I bet you dont know where all the websites real hackers hang out are either? if you name them, I just might tell them that marshviperX sent you.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 6:07

Reverse engenireed one VN's engenie.

Reverse engenireed simple trojan. It was funny. It used some sort of xor encryption, bit rotations and s-boxes to store login and password information before calling InternetConnect.
I didn't get why author bothered to encrypt them since simply setting breakpoint after decryption before actual call to InternetConnect revealed password and login.

I also cracked simplest cd protections in ~2000 back then when "let's check if this volume is cdrom and if it isn't show user messagebox 'insert cd'".

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 7:09

You talk so much about programming, but you can't talk about hax because you can't actually hax. I run a haxxed network of hax that I haxxed to hax google ads in my secret hax. I even hax my own viruses to make people get haxxed into my network. I hax at home and have a bunch of hax showing me how people on my network are being haxxed. I can even hax it so that I can see the hax on their computers. can you guys do any of that? I dont think so. I bet you dont know where all the hax are either? if you hax them, I just might tell you to hax my anus.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 7:28

>>12

fuck off weeaboo fag

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 8:10

I once extracted all of the data files from the Quake demo.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 9:00

I contribute to Hurd on a regular basis. I also use three pairs of chopsticks on one hand.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 11:06

>>16
You also don't shave and are overweight.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 11:15

Reverse engineered the level file format of the Windows 3.1 version of Chip's Challenge and created a simplistic editor that didn't work very well. All at the age of 14.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 12:47

- When I was 16 and didn't yet have Internet access, I found someone on a local dial-up BBS willing to trade Duke 3D for my copy of Doom 2, so I wrote my own packer using De-ICE (same thing that Doom 2 used) and wrote a VGA graphical demo which a texture mapped cube. Then we exchanged our software over dial-up direct connections. The guy I sent it to said it was pretty cool.
- Reverse engineered the key verifier for a piece of software I needed when I was a poorfag and wrote a keygen for it.
- Discovered an XSS exploit in a popular forum system and used it to take control of several forums in the wild. The hole has since been patched, unfortunately.
- Built my own 6502 on a breadboard in my dorm room at university.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 12:51

>>16
So it's your fault!

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 13:08

I have contributed to the image/text board community by writing a certain software, which I cannot name lest I lose anonymity.

I have discovered several unpatched exploits in Kusaba and Kareha.

I once contributed to the Hurd like >>16 but I lost interest after I discovered **just** how lazy they are

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 13:21

I've joined fairX's community.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 13:54

I lied about my l33t h4k3r credentials online

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 14:39

I actually own three hack0r books. Haven't read any of them past page 100, though.

Name: VIPPER 2011-03-23 17:32

I want to be haxed by /prog/ers.
What about you?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 17:47

>>1
HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAAHAHAAAA!!!
you think your tough huh?
one word THE FORCED INDENTATION OF CODE.
i have taken out two mission critical applications at the same time in less than 5 seconds i have been training for 3 years.
also enterprise grade best practices.
your compiler might be bigger than me,but i know mine is smarter and quicker.
my compiler is 130 kb pure lean code.
one keystroke and i'll overflow your buffers.
your the one whose a nerd.i can optimize CFLAGS anytime i want you probably haven't ever touched CFLAGS before.
you probably have sex with your computer.
you don't even know me,and you don't want to.
you'll be lucky if your even worth my attention one look at my code and you'll dissappear forever.
though i'd be hapy to humiliate you in front of all your friends.
btw IM the expertest.
i have worked in maine, new hampshire, new york,utah, colorado,florida,bahamas.
never indented my code!
im undefeated in competitive obfuscation of code.
im on my way to IOCCC.
go ahead and come step anytime you want.b*tch

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 18:44

I once ate using 3 chopsticks on each hand.

HACKER CREDENTIALS THROUGH THE ROOF.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 18:49

>>27
I once ate using 4 chopsticks on each hand.

HCARCEKDEERENTIALS THROUGH THE ROOF.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 19:49

I once ate using 5 chopsticks on each hand and feet.
HCARXE DMEYN TAINAULSS THROUGH THE ROOF.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 22:11

WOW NOW THIS IS SOME QUALITY ENTERPRISEBBCODE AMIRITE

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 22:33

>>30
What's this amirite mineral you keep talking about?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 23:15

>>31
Keep digging, you'll find it eventually.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 23:46

- Reverse engineered a java applet for a chat site (it even used lolcryption!), made my own client, and fucked around with the mods. Only anti-spam (super-easy DOS) and word filters were client-side, so only a minor win.
- Found a few SQL-injection holes in a popular mafia-game website and wrote how to easily win the game on my profile. The owners didn't know who had used the exploit and didn't keep backups, so they had to reset everything.
- Made a MSN "block checker" (that required a password and worked), social engineered around 20 MSN accounts, gave it to a friend who then used it to social engineer a few hundred. A computer teacher somewhere describes me as one of the country's best hackers to his students.
- Autism.
- Wrote half a kernel in x86_64-assembly.
- Modified the actionscript in a few flash games for easy ++win.
- I troll programming forums by recreating the noobs' programs as one-liners

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-23 23:48

>>33
Oh, and it was me who discovered how to the the alternating sup/sub writing.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 0:06

>>33-34
Ever had sex?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 0:13

>>34
It's been years it was discovered.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 0:14

>>36
I've been here years.

I cannot find the thread, though. If I remember correctly I posted some code that automated it, too.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 0:26

>>37
Oh, yeah I remember that thread too. Acknowledge as SSUUPB SMMEIMTEH

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 0:27

>>38
s/dge/dged/

Name: >>34 2011-03-24 3:18

>>35
Of course not.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 6:07

>>38
SUP MEME SUBSMITH?
What is a SUBSMITH?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 9:58

>>41
No, that's SSUUPB SMMEIMTEH.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-24 10:54

'sup meme, subsmith.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 1:19

hi

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 1:20

>>44
hi. how are you?

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 9:50

>>44
>>45
Fuck off, image board fags.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 11:36

>>46
fuck a nigger in the anus

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 11:44

I created a lisp sub-machine in my anus.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 12:24

I shit computers.

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 12:30

I hung niggers on trees in nam

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 13:25

No

Name: Anonymous 2011-03-26 16:44

>>1 and >>2 are on the same tier.

Name: Anonymous 2011-05-02 18:49

- Spent 1 week hacking a "hacker's" forum. Managed to infiltrate one of the admin's accounts and was proceeding to root the server however I encountered some problems and failed.
- Experimented with distributed brute force and artificial intelligence to generically infiltrate services. Wild success was had. Paper to be published at some point.
- Coded my own hacking tools including a mail bomber, Windows PE binary program obfuscater (defeats virus protection), detailed PHP shell (can link them for more power), C++ bot etc.
- Have found several different vulnerabilities in open source software. Nothing too clever, I still have much to learn, but interesting achievements none the less.
- Discovered 99% of "hackers" couldn't code a hello world, own a box if they purchased it, or hack their way out of a wet paper bag.

Don't change these.
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