How do I know if it's done?

Okay, I know this is the worst place in the world for advice, but anyway.

No tits, that's why I'm here instead of /b/, duh.

So. I have been in a very intense relationship for the past 9 years. Crazy ups and downs, kid, etc. I am in love. I have put everything that I have into this relationship to make it work. i have been super forgiving, and accommodating and etc. I work, he doesn't. I still come home and clean and cook and etc. And I don't mind it, because I AM in love. And I really want to be with him.

BUT, every while, my dude blows up and just fucking takes my head off. Crushes me, really. More lately... And I just fold 'cause... what's the point. I don't want to fight.
And right now... I really want to take an honest look at everything and decide: am I the only one in love here? Not what I want. If I really bother him THAT much: I don't need the hassle. Am I fighting for something that doesn't exist?
I'm really scared to even think this way, because I don't want it to be true. But I don't want to be lying to myself either.

tl;dr: How do I know if the man I love actually loves me too?

You can start by leaving and never coming back. To /lounge/, that is.

well he married you; are you stupid bitch

>>2
fuck you, but typical
>>3
No, we are not married. So up yours.

>>4
but you said you come home and cook for him.  why not come over here and cook for me, you crazy loon

>>5
haha. Because I 'm not your girlfriend, duh.

>>5
Oh wait: you've never heard of 2 adults living together and having a family without being married?

>>7
yeah, it's called common law marriage.  you go into common law marriage and you never bothered to notice if the fuckin guy loves you?

>>6
I'm too old for "a girlfriend", you teenage bitch

>>8
ok. Fuck.
Yes, I know that we have been in love.
What I am trying to figure out is: has that fizzled for him? I don't want him to be feeling "stuck". I don't want him to be with me because it's convenient.
And I don't want to be with him if he doesn't love me anymore.
And yes, we had make-up sex, and no, this time, it didn't really help. It was fun, but I still feel hurt.

>>9
Wow. I'm really sad that you are too old. What, do guys turn gay when they get old?
Also, not teen-age, pedo.

>>11
you crazy butthole.  you behave and talk like a child.  "does he really love me, boo hoo"

you would be happier in Afghanistan where you don't bitch, you just do your fucking duty

>>12
Fuck off and die.

>>13
Listen here, jerkface.  I'll help you out.  Show him you give a shit, keep your trap shut about your chick shit, and fix him a sandwich.  He'll appreciate the gesture.

>>12
Also: at least I give a shit! Plenty of women out there who will just continue in stupid loveless marriages where everyone is unhappy. Bad for all involved.

>>14
Listen, turd puddle, I have been doing that for a long time. I know he appreciates it. I appreciate him too. I just don't get where all this resentment and anger comes from out of the fucking blue. It disturbs the hell out of me.

Why are people responding to this man?

>>16
Alright, problem solved.  You're welcome.

>>16
I just don't get where all this resentment and anger comes from out of the fucking blue. It disturbs the hell out of me.
Lol, you are a bad troll on 4chan.
IHBT

This is a chick thread and it's stupid and I'm not reading it. Also same-faggotry all over the place ITT. Good bye.

>>17
>>19
Why? Why is it always assmed that I am not female?
>>20
Or I get shit for being female.
Jess Christ: yo can't win arond here!

No girls on lounge. Post timestamped pic or you are a troll.

>>22
OK.
I'll say this slowly: this. is. not. an. imageboard.
Timestamped pic impossible.
That being said, here you go: /lounge/ style.

(.)(.)

Happy?

>>23
now the butthole

Malefag, NOT samefag, here to say I empathize.

I put everything into a year with this girl, and along the way she lied to me on big issues, took & took & didn't do anything to salve the toll the relationship took on me.  All of which I did, like an utterly devoted donkey, for a solid year which now rests contentedly, a pancake made of shit, atop a hot stack of 35 difficult-but-fuckit, bootstrapping years.

I went to her hoping I could learn to love wholly & absolutely again, without reservation, and what happened instead is I got herpes (my First Ever STD, by the way, thankew, thankewverrymush), had my devotion & determination repeatedly, stupidly questioned (how many people have I proposed to in my life, do you think?  A: 2) and am now paying all the rent & bloody bills (only one of which wasn't my responsibility to begin with, to be fair)...

After a thirteen-hour workday during which I don't get any art done and am basically slinging kegs & racks of glasses all day & night for thankless asstards, and I come home to her being mad at me because, what, we broke up three months ago and I posted on some horrible porn dungeon how the relationship ended?  Something I haven't even told my own mother, or my best friend, that I anonymously threw up on fucking Craigslist, and because she's in the mood to ego-surf I catch shit for it?

I don't even want to be friends with this person anymore.  I sincerely don't.  And I'm not the sort of guy who makes friends easily, so having to shuck somebody I truly, honestly loved because they shivved me and shivved me and asked if I wanted to come back for another shivving next Tuesday...  I'm bitter toward the whole fucking human race.  This isn't about gender.  It's beyond it.  It's the fact that we can't bloody talk to one another any more, that everyone's own ass is more precious than than gold so, would-be friends or lovers, hope you like recycled Rocky Road deposited in your stupid, gaping mouths--

low-caste, desperate little coprophagics we seekers of love are.

Anyway.  My point, OP, if I had one: 

If it's done, let it be done.  If he's no good for you, walk away.  Walk away before you start to hate him (or worse, hate yourself for putting up with it).  Don't let what was begun in good faith end in the gutter.  You deserve better.

>>25
>>26
Wow. Thanks. This is why I posted here: I know there's a lot of insanity, but once in a while, there's some really heartfelt sincerity like  yours.
I am so sorry, she sounds like a real bitch. Thank-you for saying that this isn't a gender issue, cause it really isn't. It's a shitty behavior issue.
I don't know... after a few days and some perspective, I'm asking myself if there are other issues (bipolar?) going on, and since I really do love him, and I believe he loves me...  I'm hanging in there for now.

You ready to kick some ass?

Turn up the music


I was at a jam the other night, I was feelin' real good so the feelin' was right

I came to the party for a different kinda action, The next thing I know

I was doin' a Michael Jackson, I was thrown off beat and my feet got tied

And the sucker DJ just oughta be fired, He was flippin' and a slippin'

Even drawn back to, The Sucker DJ didn't know what he was doin'

Then I said to my friends this ain't the place to be, Then the fellas only came

'Cause the ladies were free, Then we left the place before the next couple o' plays

My girl said to me, I'm glad we never paid, So I called Marley Marl on the very next day

Then we cut a rap about the sucker DJ (echo)

How do I know if its done?


Do you trust him? Does he trust you?

If both answers are not yes. Then its done.

>>29
I'm just not sure if it is that simple.
Trust in what way?
I think we both trust each other not to cheat.
I feel as though he mistrusts my motives (in disagreements) at times...
I am not sure if i trust him on an emotional level right now...

>>30
what you are feeling are the first steps to becoming a lesbian.

>>31
HAHAHAHA
Yeah, no.

>>32
denial is the first step to box grinding.

34 get

Better to cry you have lost him now, then cry you still have him later :)

Cohesive connect explosive annular Managua. Irma quirk fair Sussex Tuscaloosa Schofield Myron Wilma whelm resume. Owly.

Dialogue!

>>36
Strident viscosity leonine pan Ottoman Flanagan.

Lithic tangy incisive Irma fickle rackety caulk synchrony. Incomprehensible hypothesis Berenices Capitoline derisive Jovian talk.

Well, before this thread disintegrated into gobbledegook, I was OP... Weird to read it now.
Actually have a new problem with same guy, who has really mellowed out... knock on wood.
But NOW! fucking jealousy! Suddenly me having conversations with any male is a huge problem. WTF?? After 10 years?
Any normal people at al left in /lounge/ ?
Any tips for dealing with irrational jealousy?

>>40
Yes. Sex him often enough that he no longer cares where you are because he needs a break from the marathon sex.

>>40
You wouldn't happen to be the ``FFP''/Shanley Kane would you? Anyways, the entire reason why you are even so enthralled with him is because he comes up with these difficulties for you, it's the only way to keep the fickler sex complacent in monogamy, so understand this: if he didn't love you he wouldn't do these things that confuse your oblivious and daft self, because he wouldn't care enough to and also he wouldnt want its affect (keeping you under his thumb). Plus also he kind of has to keeep you around for the kid, but he just wants to make sure you don't go around gangbanging niggers in the club everynight and get your kid/him herpes/AIDS from being around you.

I hope this clears things up.

>>41
Although this may be hard to imagine, apparently every night isn't even enough for this effect!

>>42
Sadly, you may be somewhat right re motive...
However, going out every night isn't exactly me, and he knows it. I'm pretty much a "good girl". That's another reason this is so crazy.
>oblivious
>daft
Fuck toy

Ahem. Fuck you is what I actually typed.

oh god my balls it hurts

>>43
going out every night isn't exactly me
Going out any nights is a pretty big red flag for any guy in a heavily involved monogamous setup like that.
this is so crazy
If you would reread and internalize what I said, you wouldn't think it so crazy. Well, then again, wemyn lojiq. Nice fruedian slip though lol.

>>46
Well.
I don't go at night AT ALL. Is that better for you?
Jesus. I make muffins in a fucking apron, okay?
Fortunately for me, I'm not with >>46, and me & my guy had a good heart to heart last night: he apologized for getting heavy & crazy about nothing, and explained old hurts and yadda, yadda, yadda.
i don't know. I guess I'll see if it sticks... I just don't want to get shit for talking to some old guy at a party. Fucking A!!! I mean I get it if they are young and hot, but this is insane.

>>47
Yeah. Fortunately for everyone, no one is.

>>48
no shit

>>47
old hurts

Let me guess, you cheated on him in the past.

>>50
Wouldn't be surprised, bitch sounds like the kind of upright cunt who ends up getting drunk and bent over in a bar stall by some random guy 2 years into the shit, the night before he was gonna propose.