Asperger's eh? I'll give you some advice. The most important thing to remember is to refuse that label. This is not to say that the information doesn't have some validity or use, but never accept the assertion that you have a "disorder". If hiding your true feelings behind lies, and muscular contortions is normal; if the ability to fool oneself into accepting a society that blithely ignores the damage it does by claiming that "everything's not black and white", then I'd rather be disordered, as it's clear that their characterization is simply an example of a tyranny of the majority. Check this out:
http://www.rdos.net/eng/asperger.htm
I'm not saying I'm ready to accept this hypothesis, but I find it compelling, deserving of more research, and most importantly a perspective that does not devalue the atypical by analyzing them only in relation to a questionably "functional" mean.
On to "getting laid". Point one: You used the word girl(s) three times.
>>20 can look for girls, you need to look for women. Your inexperience is inconsistent with your age, and it's possible that you are sexually attracted to females whose level of sexual maturity is at the same level as you. I hate to tell you, but you've missed that boat. Of course you might try hanging around outside of Convents. Seriously though, 18, and as you mature I assure you that soon you won't even be able to have a peer to peer conversation with anyone under 25(though I can claim a 22yo when I was 38 Gigity gigity). On to the how to. More than twenty years ago, before Asperger's was the media darling it is today, I recognized my difficulties with social situations and reading cues, and found a solution. I studied acting. Not only did this help me to understand and approximate the way most people communicate, it provided a community of interesting, often kind and forgiving, and notoriously libertine people to interact with. So find your local theater's, community college programs, and community groups, and audition. I strongly suggest you get on stage, but if the lights are too bright, then volunteer to work as a tech. Then at least you still get to watch, and go to the parties. Point two, by now I'm sure that the whole virginity thing has become a massive obstacle in your head, and is occupying far more of your mind than is healthy. I would suggest that you just dive in. Pay for sex. This is another big area where society is a big hypocritical goat fuck, so with no clear messages it leaves us confused. I'm not gonna get into the ethics of prostitution. I'm gonna tell you this. Look in the phonebook for massage parlors, pick a couple not too close to where you live, and go. They are professionals. Be honest, but as always with "normal" people, don't be too honest too quickly, and try to not be too weird. Any professional place will be clean, pleasant, and condom use will be a foregone conclusion. Relax, let them do their jobs, and never forget that it is purely a financial transaction, and a physical act. Your heart may tell you different. Don't listen. This will be especially important with your first real relationship, but I'm not gonna get into that either. In short, suck it up. If you want to do man things, then man-up and do them. Thinking and analyzing shit to death is an important part of what we can do, but without action it's nothing.
I'll share one last thing with
>>20 and any other young people with a similar orientation. A lot of life is going with strengths and working on weaknesses. As a strange boy, I got picked on, a lot. This is a pretty clear weakness to see and an easy problem to fix. Once again it's a jump in the deep end solution. I joined the army. And in retrospect, I wasn't the only oddball there. The military teaches everybody who joins a reliable baseline of appropriate behavior. They tell everyone that what they knew or believed was worthless, then they tell them, usually in no uncertain terms, what they have to do to be successful. There are some big problems with this. Particularly now that so many countries are involved in shooting wars. You may have to do something you would regret. Like murder some poor skinny bastard so your country can steal the oil in his land. Or even more frightening, you may find yourself in a position wherein the person you know you should be killing is wearing the same uniform. This is the time to use that sense of detachment we're famous for. All men have the desire to be part of something important; something good, just, decent, and bigger than themselves. I've been looking for it for a long time and in my experience, the larger the organization, the more evil it is. The NT's and their philosophy of "Gray Ethics" take over, and though every member can parrot the Ideals of the organization, they don't walk the walk. So remember, you're there to learn skills,
not to be a true believer. True believers get shot. When somebody says shut up, don't stand up. Until you have the skills. And the cause.
That's why the labeling is so dangerous. If I had been labeled all those years ago, it might have prevented me from doing many of the things I've done. As it was I had to do some tap dancing to get into The army, and I can fake an MMPI II with the best of 'em. Ultimately I have come to believe that we are among the ranks of the pioneers. Those who are profoundly dissatisfied with the status quo and work to change it. We stand with those who need greater freedom just to be ourselves and have helped explore the world, and the mind in its pursuit. And it is a great time for us. A new society is dawning, an Information Society, and we will be as great a part of it as we have been in the development of every other social advance in human history. As long as we don't let the majority marginalize us. We have to draw our own margins.