[CYOA] Choose Your Own VIP Adventure!

The same thread exists on 4 different textboards now. You walk in to /vip/ from your slumber in the cave and decide what to do today.
To post QUALITY posts go to >>2
To JEWS JEWS to >>3
To make your way out of a neolithic slumber that is 4chan/vip/ go to >>241

You arrive at this thread, seemingly lost. A simple glance at the thread would allow you to understand what is happening, but because you are not VIP QUALITY!, you choose not to.

If this is too complicated for you because you haven't understood the concept of CTRL + F yet, go to >>20

If you still can't understand what's going on in this thread, go to >>4

To walk forwards and look at your surroundings, go to >>23