/prog/ - Microsoft's new programming language

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 20:49

They call it LISP#, or L# for short. This language is expected to revolutionize the world of progriding. Already, Windows NT 8, Linux Kernel 2.8, and Hurd are being rewritten in this new language.

This language will make you a slave to the evil corporations!
~Richard Stallman
This was my idea.
~Jimbo Wales
So dicking good.
~Lunis Tortevalles
Fuck.
~Gerald J. ``OpenSUSE'' Sussman
Maybe the only science I don't hate.
~Barrack Saddam Hussein Obama

The new language features and entirely new syntax that will make imperative programmers feel right at home. Lambdas have been removed, as well S-expressions, to simplify the language and make it more accessible to traditional programmers.

LISP was like gay sex, I mean, just look at the name, but we here at Microsoft have toned it down so that most people can swallow it.
~Microsoft official press statement

The language also features a new overhaul that completely integrates the language with the GUI designer that made Visual Studios so great. Microsoft claims that because only nerds use the command line, it was depreciated and was removed.

The change was long overdue.
~Microsoft VP of Cloud Computing

The changes have met some controversy however, mostly among the 13-18 male and 27-40 male demographics. An investigative reported managed to track down a man who disliked the changes. The meeting took place in his basement.

Fuck Em-Dollar Sign. I fucking hate them. The world would be so much fucking better if they would just go away! Seriously, why can't the world be free? I'm so sick of this. Why won't they just leave me alone? Haven't they taken enough from us? I post on a popular imageboard and I know that many feel the same.
~Neckbeard

The user then collapsed into tears. When asked for a response Microsoft responded:

LOLOLOL WHAT A FAG
~Steve J. Dalhmer

It seems to be a laughably one sided fight.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 20:56

The new language features and entirely new syntax that will make imperative programmers feel right at home. Lambdas have been removed, as well S-expressions, to simplify the language and make it more accessible to traditional programmers.
The only sane choice.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 22:39

Good. This functional bullshit is nothing but a fad.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 22:45

GNAA quality post. A++++, would read again.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 23:28

"The language also features a new overhaul that completely integrates the language with the GUI designer that made Visual Studios so great.

Finally! A VisualBASIC like interface for my AI bots!

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-22 23:31

still better that f#

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 0:19

Still better than Haskell.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 1:09

>>7
Still better than (Still better than Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than (Still better than Segmentation Fa^{Core dum^{Bios Err^{syntax ellol}}}

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 14:53

Still better than Lisp.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 17:18

Still worse than Bonerlang.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 18:43

Barrack Saddam Hussein Obama
AHAHAHA SO ORIGINAL OBAMA IS A MUSLIM UR SO FUNNY OMG LOL XDXDXDX MR FUNNY MAN IS FUNNY LOL CONGRATS MAN

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 20:38

Actually, I think that LISP would be a good addition to ASP languages.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 20:43

SLACKWARE SUPREMACY

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 20:43

>Linux Kernel 2.8
Update your pasta.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 20:45

The .NET Framework is a large, comprehensive class library providing a wide variety of functionality and application building blocks. Here is a small selection:

System.Collections
System.ComponentModel
System.Configuration
System.Data
System.Data.OracleClient
System.Data.SqlClient
System.Diagnostics
System.DirectoryServices
System.Drawing
System.EnterpriseServices
System.Globalization
System.IO
System.Management
System.Messaging
System.Net
System.Reflection
System.Resources
System.Runtime
System.Security
System.Threading
System.Web
System.Web.Mail
System.Web.Services
System.Xml

These cover just about all the building blocks you’d need to construct a typical ENTERPRISE APPLICATION.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 20:47

NOT FUCKING FUNNY LISP JOKES GOT UNFUNNY FOUR YEARS AGO YOU FUCKING SPERGY GOONLORDS SO SHUT UP AND STOP POSTING

NO MODS NO GODS

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 21:33

Microsoft is what we need to bring Lisp to the mainstream.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 21:45

>>1
It's not SUAVE enough.



                           //`'''```,

                 o        // LISP   `.,

           ,....OOo.   .c;.',,,.'``.,,.`

        .'      ____.,'.//

       / _____  \___/.'

      | / ||  \\---\|

      ||  ||   \\  ||

      co  co    co co

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-23 22:46

>>18
go away.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-24 1:08

>>19
No.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-24 1:47

>>20
fuck off lithpfag

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-24 21:48

L#, or IronLISP?

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-24 22:11

I'm not sure what this is trying to say.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-24 22:11

>>23
it's art.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 1:15

(import System.Windows.Forms)
(enable ENTERPRISE)

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 1:33

http://www.losethos.com/doc/AENotes.html

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 1:52

>>21
You first.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 2:00

These are old Moses comics I did as offerings.
http://www.losethos.com/comics/

These are hymns I did as offerings.
http://www.losethos.com/hymns.html

God just told me I might be in debt, so maybe I'll do an offering. He's usually in a better mood, at least, if you do an offering.

Okay I did a comic.

God says...
C:\TEXT\BIBLE.TXT

There remaineth yet the youngest, and, behold, he keepeth the
sheep. And Samuel said unto Jesse, Send and fetch him: for we will not
sit down till he come hither.

16:12 And he sent, and brought him in. Now he was ruddy, and withal of
a beautiful countenance, and goodly to look to. And the LORD said,
Arise, anoint him: for this is he.

16:13 Then Samuel took the horn of oil, and anointed him in the midst
of his brethren: and the Spirit of the LORD came upon David from that
day forward. So Samuel

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 2:02

You ever wonder exactly how that story went, in real terms?

Name: VIPPER 2011-09-25 3:48

>>28
WHAT THE FUCK!

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 5:56

>>28
http://www.losethos.com/comics/051114Moses.JPG
Why is the branch of Hôrai speaking?

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 15:32

javascript:quote(31,"post1");
oh shit man i thought the burning bush was an std

le LOL

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 20:30

http://www.losethos.com/comics/100302BMoses.jpg

this ones funny

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 21:27

terry is a batshit crazy asperger 'murrikan

so, a perfectly fine and acceptable american citizen

FUK YEAH 'MURIKA

on a unrelated note, 'merca will dissolve itself in its own feces one day or another. praise the lord for free guns, no social healthcare, and a truly retarded political system. inb4 hurp u liberal fag, i'm not american, and honestly, don't give a flying jewgold-powered hitlerpenis about 'murkas future

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 21:38

Just got run-off the sidewalk by a couple niggers.

I got a new name for the phenomina where niggers abuse customer lines in stores -- "African line dances".

God says...
C:\TEXT\WEALTH.TXT

diminution of the value
of silver from any observations which they had made upon the prices
either of corn, or of other commodities, they had still less reason to
infer it from any supposed increase of wealth and improvement.

Second Period.--But how various soever may have been the opinions of the
learned concerning the progress of the value of silver during the first
period, they are unanimous concerning it during the second.

From about 1570 to about 1640, during a period of about seventy years

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 21:38

Just got run-off the sidewalk by a couple niggers.

I got a new name for the phenomina where niggers abuse customer lines in stores -- "African line dances".

God says...
C:\TEXT\WEALTH.TXT

diminution of the value
of silver from any observations which they had made upon the prices
either of corn, or of other commodities, they had still less reason to
infer it from any supposed increase of wealth and improvement.

Second Period.--But how various soever may have been the opinions of the
learned concerning the progress of the value of silver during the first
period, they are unanimous concerning it during the second.

From about 1570 to about 1640, during a period of about seventy years

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 22:02

>>33

these are a little disturbing. I hope they are generated by a program.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 23:32

>>37

10 i = i + 1
15 IF i > 99999 THEN PRINT ".";: i = 0
20 IF INKEY$ = "" THEN 10
30 PRINT "King James Bible, Line:", i

God says...
Line: 98160

1:1 That which was from the beginning, which we have heard, which we
have seen with our eyes, which we have looked upon, and our hands have
handled, of the Word of life; 1:2 (For the life was manifested, and we
have seen it, and bear witness, and shew unto you that eternal life,
which was with the Father, and was manifested unto us;) 1:3 That which
we have seen and heard declare we unto you, that ye also may have
fellowship with us: and truly our fellowship is with the Father, and
with his Son Jesus Christ.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-25 23:54

windows Nt 8...
is that like windows 7(+1) or windows 98(+1)... =)

>>Revolutionize implies going in circles..?
sounds like microsoft...

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 0:12

also linux kernal being written in microsoft language...

I Don't Believe You ! *opens google

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 0:25

>>39,40
n3m7i or whatever your name was, please just go away.

You know exactly nothing about the shit you keep talking, and it's really sad.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 0:41

Oh boo

I will talk about it until I know... it's called learning, not parroting

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 0:50

Boo says...

joining codes for always sought inebriated co pupils free
contributing multiple acquire cedars circuit initiated
PUNITIVE Speak inexpressible pronounces word bind WANT
despite feet aptly slipped perversity weaknesses presumed
draw abideth endured nine extol overthrow

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 0:59

>>42
Not acceptable.

Learn, then come back.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 1:10

>>44
And argue with others who are also certain they know everything..?

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 1:12

>>41
btw
if you call something sad with a smirk on your face, you are retarded

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 3:59

..something kind of interesting..(maybe?)

that "shannon's entropy" thing in normal 8-bit bytes...

0 / [000,0000 - 111,1111]
10 / [00,0000 - 11,1111]
110 / [0,0000 - 1,1111]
1110 / [,0000 - 1111]
...etc

0 - specifies 7-bits
10 - 6
110 - 5...

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 4:46

>>47
Why not explain your horrible idea in clear, full sentences so we know what you're on about?

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 5:46

>>48
Because he was born late and experienced a prolonged period of oxygen deprivation during delivery.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 7:18

ty [risc]>>112

this is huffman coding [not shannon's entropy]
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Huffman_coding

1
01
001
000

//---------

its really just a pattern / no idea for uses as yet...

in a nibble [4-bit]

0 - (xxx)[#0 - 7] (3 bits)
10 - (xx)[#8 - 11] (2 bits)
110 - (x)[#12 - 13] (1 bit)
111 - (x)[#14 -15] (1 bit)
-> total = 4 bit

could also be

1 - (xxx)[#0 - 7] (3 bits)
01 - (xx)[#8 - 11] (2 bits)
001 - (x)[#12 - 13] (1 bit)
000 - (x)[#14 -15] (1 bit)
-> total = 4 bit

or even could be

000 - (xxx)[#0 - 7] (3 bits)
001 - (xx)[#8 - 11] (2 bits)
01 - (x)[#12 - 13] (1 bit)
1 - (x)[#14 -15] (1 bit)
-> total = 4 bit (compression -2bit / expansion +2)...

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 9:49

...using a pre-emptive length specifier

1 / 01 / 001 / 000 -> can be represented in two bits...

so use one byte to specify the next four length variables

1 = 3 bits = 00 (50% prob)
01 = 2 bit = 01 (25%)
001 = 1 bit = 10 (12.5)
000 = 1 bit = 11 (12.5)

vv vv vv vv xxx xxx xxx xxx (16->20 bit [worst case - probably most likely])

vv vv vv vv x x x x (16->12 bit [best case - least likely..?])

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 10:34

>>40
It's okay, it's under the MS Community Promise.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 10:45

^E~~g~~^ypt^ⁱ^ans _oⁿl~~y~~kn^ew howtod_ouble ⁿum_berso_rdⁱv_ide ^th^em b~~^{_^{^y}}~~ _tw^_{_o}_.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-26 12:51

loseyourpants

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-27 12:09

As long as I can code in eMacs.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-27 14:38

GC is shit.

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-27 15:28

>>55
Do they still sell those?

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-27 17:28

Visual L#.NET

Name: Xarn 2011-09-28 6:56

^{S^{L^{A^{C^KW}A}R}E}_{S_{U_{P_{R_EM}A}C}Y}^{S^{L^{A^{C^KW}A}R}E}_{S_{U_{P_{R_EM}A}C}Y}^{S^{L^{A^{C^KW}A}R}E}_{S_{U_{P_{R_EM}A}C}Y}^{S^{L^{A^{C^KW}A}R}E}_{S_{U_{P_{R_EM}A}C}Y}^{S^{L^{A^{C^KW}A}R}E}_{S_{U_{P_{R_EM}A}C}Y}

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-28 8:41

http://img529.imageshack.us/img529/6448/cppvslisptk6zy7.gif

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-28 20:22

Visual L#.NET Team Studio Professional 2012

Name: Anonymous 2011-09-29 19:04

>>61
Who the fuck even uses Team Studio?

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-01 14:45

J# was a total abortion.

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-01 20:50

>>63
japples

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-14 20:22

This wouldn't be ~~^_terrible~~.

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-14 20:33

DUBS MOTHERFUCKER DUBS MOTHERFUCKER DUBS

C H E C K ' E M !

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-14 20:56

What if Minecraft and Touhou were rewritten in this language?

Would Minecraft be less autistic?
Would Touhou be less pedophilic?

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-15 3:58

>Linux Kernel 2.8
Kernel 3.1 is already available for download

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-15 4:02

Ass Licking Lesbian Honeys Have Anal Masturbation Delights with Dildos

Name: Anonymous 2011-10-15 4:16

>>68
Linux eduard-laptop 3.0.0-12-generic #20-Ubuntu SMP Fri Oct 7 14:56:25 UTC 2011 x86_64 x86_64 x86_64 GNU/Linux

Name: FrozenVoid 2011-10-15 4:45

>>70
http://www.kernel.org/pub/linux/kernel/v3.0/testing/linux-3.1-rc4.tar.bz2

Microsoft's new programming language

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