The truth behind #fortune

I'm sick and tired of this age-old "omg i wanna do fortune how do i got fortunes????" faggotry that's rampant in /b/. To end it, here's the story behind the whole unfortunate #fortune thing.

In mid-2007 it was decided that anonymity would no longer be enforced in /b/ and so the name field that had been gone for so long was brought back. A new feature was also introduced, called "fortune," which worked with the #fortune command. To make it work, you had to put #fortune in the now non-existent name field. Fortune only worked (and still works) in /b/, nowhere else.

But then, after a while, things got a little out of hand and suddenly there were namefags galore. Due to the abso-fucking-brick-shitting-enormous name faggotry, the name field was quickly taken down. The guys who have fortune now had it when the name field was taken down, and now they're permanently stuck with it.

So no, you can't do fortune. It's simply impossible. The fortune fags are just pulling your fucking gullible newbie leg, so stop asking how to do it.

ok bye

tldr
After 2005 ended it was decided that /b/ had gone to shit, and so nothing past that matters

>>1
I LOL'd.

>>1
/prog/ is not /b/. Fucking sage.
Also, #fortune has been in 4chan since the very beginning, but nobody discovered it until recently. And it's not even something that 4chan came up with. Omikuji was around way before 4chan had it. And, no one is "permanently stuck with it", and there's other ways to get a fortune. You just have to be NOT RETARDED in order to turn it on or off -- admittedly a fairly difficult task to accomplish, considering this is /b/ you're talking about.

But let's make this /prog/-related, shall we? Here's the 0ch omikuji code. As you can see it's surprisingly simple. 4chan's #fortune is a little bit more involved, since it has to remove the #fortune from the name as well as edit the post text, so it's not just a quick s/// job.


sub execute

{

    my    $this = shift;

    my    ($sys,$form) = @_;

   

    if($form->Contain('FROM','!omikuji')){

        my $from = $form->Get('FROM');

        my $res = OMIKUJI(time());

        $from =~ s/!omikuji/<¥/b>【$res】<b>/;

        $form->Set('FROM',$from);

    }

    return 0;

}

#------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

#

#    おみくじ機能

#    -------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

#    @param    $seed    ランダムの種

#    @return    結果文字列

#

#------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

sub OMIKUJI

{

    my    ($seed) = @_;

    my    (@results,$count);

   

    @results = ('大吉','中吉','小吉','吉','末吉','凶','大凶');

    $count = @results;

   

    srand($seed);

    return($results[int(rand(65535)) % $count]);

}

Oh, nice job shiichan, adding an extra \n after every line. Wtf.

People should age this more.

And why is it that /prog/ is more active than all the other text boards combined?

>>7
Because when you achieve Satori you have more time for posting pronunciation threads.

>>7
/prog/ isn't really about programming... it's about some kind of engineering, or art, or magic perhaps.

>>9
It's like geometry isn't about measuring the earth.

lol learn 2 javascipt
javascript:void(document.forms[0].name.value="#fortune");

Speaking of secrets: try putting fusianasan in the name field of a Kareha board...

>>12
on 2ch, mokorikomo and yamazaki have similar effects.

>>12
Nice: http://bbs.chiisai.net/download/kareha.pl/1181317686/9

>>13
And fusianasan, because ALL OF THEM CAME FROM 2CHANNEL.

Kareha doesn't get it right anyway because it erases all the text, so stuff like http://fusianasan.2ch.net/ won't work.

>>11
javascript:void(self.main.document.forms[0].name.value="#fortune");

Should work in frames mode.

>>9
it this some kind of christian magic?

fortune still works if you use another board

>>18
lol

>>17
No, Christians use Perl.

Does it still work today?

I am a Perl magician, ask me anything.

wat

fatget

$ fortune
You will probably marry after a very brief courtship.

[robert@haskal] fortune
Your present plans will be successful.

[13:14][0.52][richardcmongler@eeepcee:~][^75%][0]
$ /usr/games/fortune
FORTUNE'S GUIDE TO DEALING WITH REAL-LIFE SCIENCE FICTION: #14
What to do...
    if reality disappears?
    Hope this one doesn't happen to you.  There isn't much that you
    can do about it.  It will probably be quite unpleasant.

    if you meet an older version of yourself who has invented a time
    traveling machine, and has come from the future to meet you?
    Play this one by the book.  Ask about the stock market and cash in.
    Don't forget to invent a time traveling machine and visit your
    younger self before you die, or you will create a paradox.  If you
    expect this to be tricky, make sure to ask for the principles
    behind time travel, and possibly schematics.  Never, NEVER, ask
    when you'll die, or if you'll marry your current SO.

>>27
eeepcee
You're an asus!

$ fortune
This is not ubuntu, faggot.

>>29
No, fortune has always been an integral part of what makes Unix Unix. It's even specified in the Posix standard.

>>27
Why is fortune under [m]/usr/games[/b]? THIS SHOULD NEVER HAPPEN! Move it to /usr/bin right now.

Just for you >>31-kun, I shall symlink it to /usr/local/bin, but no more due to your being so demanding.

anonymous@4chan:~$ fortune | cowsay
 ________________________________________
/ BOFH excuse #397:                      \
|                                        |
| T-1's congested due to porn traffic to |
\ the news server.                       /
 ----------------------------------------
        \   ^__^
         \  (oo)\_______
            (__)\       )\/\
                ||----w |
                ||     ||

>>33
This is not ubuntu, faggot.

>>34
Your clairvoyance is truly amazing anon-kun! To be able to divine just what distro and o/s >>33-kun is running merely from seeing his command prompt. Simply amazing and awe inspiring.

>>35
Actually, I saw an invisible post, and decided to say the first thing that came to my mind to see Void's reaction. I do that.

>>36
well carry on then, lads

>>1
implying someone with a clue still gives a fuck about /b/

>>38
replying to a post from 2007 (even though the reply would also have been relevant in 2007).

I miss fortunes.
______
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