Race riots in the UK. White liberals hating on rednecks in the US. Nice.
Name:
littlekid2332011-08-09 22:55
“Excuse me, Mr. Nick!” It was Pearl Fey. She looked very small behind the tall oak defendant’s stand.Phoenix heard Franziska von Karma, the prosecutor, babbling something about her perfection, and decided that he could spare his attention. “What is it, Pearls?” He whispered out of the corner of his mouth. The girl stared up at him with her large brown eyes. Her silky brown hair was braided into two circles behind her head that bounced up and down when she was surprised or excited. And to top it off she wore the standard light purple channeler’s robe with a pink sash, only in miniature. “Mr. Nick, I have to go potty, bad!” “I’m sorry, Pearls, but you’ll have to hold it a little longer. The judge doesn’t look ready to call a recess yet.” “Oh…” “Don’t worry, we’ll get you to a bathroom. Just hang in there, okay?” “Okay!” said Pearl, breaking into a grin. Phoenix couldn’t help but smile back. He didn’t like kids, but Pearl never caused any trouble. “Mr. Wright! I would advise you to pay attention to your own client’s trial!” “Y-yes, your honor!” Phoenix stammered. The judge continued. “Ms. Von Karma was just about to call the next witness to the stand…” It was Lotta Hart, the nosy photographer who almost always managed to show up in time to witness the crime scene. They began the cross examination. Phoenix listened carefully to the entire testimony, and Pearl waited patiently. He kept reviewing all the evidence, looking frantically for contradictions, but the story seemed airtight. He could tell the judge was getting impatient, and his window of opportunity was closing. This looked like it could be the end… “Need some help?” A familiar voice came from right next to him, and Phoenix glanced over in astonishment. “Pearls? What…” His heart almost stopped. There stood Mia Fey, his dead mentor. He’d always had something of a crush on her, and now she looked more beautiful than ever before. Now, her hair was brown, and braided up in the back just like Pearl’s. He realized that the young spirit medium must be channeling Mia. “Hmmm…these clothes are a little small though.” Phoenix blushed as he realized just how short the eight-year-old’s skirt was on the fully grown Mia. It barely covered her crotch! And now Mia, who had always had a large bust, was quite literally almost popping out of the minuscule channeling robes. She must have noticed Phoenix staring. “Get it together, Phoenix! You’ve got a case to win!” He nodded and turned back to the witness stand. Mia continued. “Now, start trying to press the witness for-urk!” She suddenly felt an intense pressure in her abdomen. That little girl was working on quite a load! “Are you okay, Mia?” “Y-yeah…I’m fine…” she reassured him, although she was beginning to sweat. I’m not sure how much longer I can hold it. “Ms. Hart, isn’t it true you took more than one photo of the crime scene?” “Well, yeah! You reckon I’d let a story this big go by with just one pitcher to show for it?” “Would you mind presenting those additional pictures to the court?” “The prosecution has deemed the additional photograph to be irrelevant.” Phoenix pointed in his trademark gesture. “I think that’s for the people of this court to decide!” “I’m sorry, Ms. Von Karma, but I must agree with the defense on this – YOW!” Franziska cracked her whip viciously at the old man. “Very well! If you wish to waste this court’s time, I will present the other photo.” “Hmmm… what could this mean…?” Phoenix pored over the newly submitted picture for any discrepancies. “T-there, a contradiction! Think about the evidence you have and compare it to the picture you just got!” counseled Mia in a rather strained tone of voice. At that very moment she was forcing back an intense urge to use the bathroom by any means necessary. I’ve got to focus on the trial…she chided herself. But she could feel her concentration slipping. As her protégé raised an objection, she gripped the defendant’s stand with white knuckles. She shifted nervously in her uncomfortably tight clothing. She couldn’t really blame Phoenix for staring, after all, she was sporting some truly eye popping cleavage. “Are you really alright, chief? You don’t look so good.” Phoenix asked. He seemed genuinely concerned, as Mia’s face had blanched and she was now sweating noticeably. The air around her was beginning to waver and bend almost imperceptibly. “Don’t worry about me, you need to think of the client!” Ugh...this is the worst I’ve ever had to go in my whole life. I can feel my connection to Pearl waning… Mia quickly began to understand the bottom line: if she didn’t find relief soon, she would go back to the spirit world and leave Phoenix on his own. As the fight between Phoenix and Franziska dragged on, Mia’s eyes widened in desperation. An airy fart squeezed itself out of her, and the very tip of a hard turd emerged from between her cheeks. She needed a toilet, now. Her lips parted as an almost inaudible moan escaped them. She clutched her backside tightly and hopped up and down to distract herself. She stopped and doubled over as she farted again, louder. The sheer volume of feces inside her astounded Mia. She fought hard to hold it in, but it was a losing battle. The whole room started to narrow to tunnel vision, and the sound of Phoenix and Franziska arguing at the top of their lungs faded to a dull roar. This is it…she thought. It’s now or never. She relaxed her sphincter, and a large volume of gas escaped her. “Ohhh…” She ceased to perceive anything else in the room, except the blissful release she was feeling. She gave her body a push to help things along, and just like that she was defecating. Her eyes were closed, and beneath her slightly upturned nose her mouth was formed into an ‘O’ of pure bliss. The enormous turd that had been bothering her slid smoothly out of her rectum and rested against her panties for a moment, before another push from Mia caused them to bulge out easily with a soft crackle. The poop kept coming and began to pile into a mound. Even though everyone in the courtroom was watching Mia awkwardly, all she could feel was the warm, gooey sensation on her behind. If I had known how much pleasure you get from soiling yourself, I would have done this while I was alive! When that piece was finished, she could feel more lining up for exit. This one was wider, so she spread her legs and bent over the stand, revealing more cleavage. Her brow furrowed and she bit her lower lip out of exertion. Oh, my, this one is huge! What on earth did that little girl eat? She was so lost in concentration that Mia’s bladder released, causing a fountain of urine to cascade from between her legs. A puddle formed underneath her, splashing onto the floor. As she strained, Mia released a big fart into Pearl’s loaded panties. “Nnnnngh!” With the noise she was making, everyone in the courtroom was looking at her. “What’s going on?” “Mommy, is the lady going poo-poo?” If there was any doubt before, it was now clear that Mia was going poo-poo, as she began to push in earnest on the big lump of excrement inside her. Mia’s anus began to widen further and further, and gradually, her bowel movement began to slide out with a soft, crackling. “Nnnh…nnh…oh!” Her sphincter was stretched to its limit.Finally, the widest part passed through and began to slide easily into her heavy panties. “Ahhhhhhh…” Mia as the football shaped BM smushed at last into Pearl’s undies, which were adorned with bumblebees and flowers. The panties sagged considerably beneath her short skirt, revealing the crack of her bum, which was smeared brown. Mia stood up. Every man, woman and child in the court room was staring at her open mouthed after witnessing her display. Mia barely noticed. That was the thing about being a spirit, she thought. You don’t have to worry about the opinions of others. After a moment of silence, Mia cleared her throat. “If the court is ready, may we continue with the…oh! Ungh…mmmph…” She closed one of her eyes and grimaced. She pushed on her tummy with a slender hand and finally voided the last of her bowels. A thin log slithered out of her and rested on top of the enormous pile in her panties. “Hang on…there’s more…” After an audible fart she grunted again, releasing a mushy mass of hot slop that coated her production. She nodded. “Your honor…?” “Well, I must say that in all my years I have never seen someone take a case so seriously."
Earth dipshit, not the same poster but whole foods has been and always will be populated mostly by right wing nutjobs. The founder is a total right wing nutjob and the whole organic food ideology has it's roots in the right (it's more expensive, you're paying more for the [perceived] better product, it's very bourgeoisie in nature). The founder even fought against Obamacare and said that only people with money like him deserve adequate care. Or something along those lines it was a while ago, I hardly remember.
>>7
This is hardly surprising. People who buy store bought "organic" foods are of course morons. Apparently, they have no problem with increasing the defense budget (which sucks up more money than social safety net programs do) yet say they are being "fiscally conservative". The cognitive dissonance these people have truly boggles the mind.
>>8
Read a book (or many more). It will do you some good.
Name:
Anonymous2011-08-11 14:32
>>9
>(which sucks up more money than social safety net programs do)
>Organic food not a leftist staple
>Accusing others of cognitive dissonance
How's that alternative reality working for you?
>>10
Apparently, you've either slept through or failed your Intro to Mathematics class back in elementary school because anyone with half a brain will realize that that most of the government spending (by both parties, mind you) goes towards the defense budget. There's more military spending going on than just Iraq and Afghanistan Organic food not a leftist staple
"Organic" is a meaningless term when any asshole can just take a shit in a box and label it "organic". For real organic stuff, you go to a local farm or verified farmer's market. Not some bullshit store like "Whole Foods". How's that alternative reality working for you?
You mean how's it working for you? Nobody in their right mind seriously suggests that social safety net programs suck up more of the government's budget than its defense (and by extension, DHS national security style bullshit). But, hey, you can continue to pretend in your la-la world with Humpty Dumpty, Hansel and Gretel and Mother Goose where military spending doesn't cost a dime, and where social safety net programs cost upwards of a trillion dollars a year.
Name:
Anonymous2011-08-11 19:44
>>11
You do know that the DoD only gets 20% of total Federal spending, and the two biggest welfare programs--Social Security and Medicare--are between them approaching 50% of US federal government spending right now, just those two programs all by themselves, and growing by 10-12% per year, right? Add in all the SSI-checks-for-crackheads, midnight-baxitball, Medicaid, "income security," "nutritional assistance," stuff that the government gives the rather Orwellian label of "Other Mandatory Spending" in the big pie charts, and we're already at 55%. This is from that notorious right-wing kook site, Wikipedia.
So, what are you smoking, and can I have a hit?
Name:
Anonymous2011-08-11 21:50
>>12
Keynesian fags ignore logic and reason. This is why most of them are liberal socialists. Deficit spending forever is the only reality they understand.
>>12 You do know that the DoD only gets 20% of total Federal spending
This ignores the other countless hundreds of billions of dollars that's spent on the military outside of the Department of Defense, intelligence agencies (which are classified of course), and a whole slew of other shit that even half of Congress doesn't know about. and the two biggest welfare programs--Social Security and Medicare--are between them approaching 50% of US federal government spending right now, just those two programs all by themselves, and growing by 10-12% per year, right? Add in all the SSI-checks-for-crackheads, midnight-baxitball, Medicaid, "income security," "nutritional assistance," stuff that the government gives the rather Orwellian label of "Other Mandatory Spending" in the big pie charts, and we're already at 55%.
A lot of that is inflated because of the stimulus that was put out (not that I entirely agree with how it was managed). Once that expires, things should level out (barring anything else) Wikipedia
There's your problem. Wikipedia is shit when it comes to economic matters.
>>14
>This ignores the other countless hundreds of billions of dollars that's spent on the military outside of the Department of Defense, intelligence agencies (which are classified of course)
[citation needed]
>and a whole slew of other shit that even half of Congress doesn't know about.
Which, of course, still finds its way into the budget somehow.
>Wikipedia is shit when it comes to economic matters.
>The facts don't support my world view. Therefore, the facts must be wrong.
You're really reaching when you try to say that Wikipedia is bent right.
Name:
Anonymous2011-08-12 1:31
>>3
hippy? are you really behind the times like you are sounding?
>>15 [citation needed]
Nuclear research, production, cleaning, etc. Most of that is Department of Energy, but it's quite intertwined with military spending, and of course, the DHS (all these departments are more interconnected than you think). >The facts don't support my world view. Therefore, the facts must be wrong.You're really reaching when you try to say that Wikipedia is bent right.Wikipedia is shit for economics because a lot of what passes for economics borders on pseudoscience (the fact that people look up to GDP as an indicator of anything is one). Social safety net programs, and healthcare in general wouldn't be so outrageously costly (for both people and government) if there was actual universal healthcare (the bill that was passed is utter shit). And, not to mention the fact that the US barely has a manufacturing capacity and has no problem with widely outsourcing its labor, it's no wonder why you have 40+ million on food stamps.
>>17 the Far Right abandon those values ages ago
Did they ever have them in the first place? As far as I can tell, in the past they were more eloquent in their propaganda, but that's about it.
Name:
Anonymous2011-08-14 19:49
>>19
I don't know, but if they did, you'd still pretend they didn't anyway. Am I not right, comrade?
>>20 Am I not right, comrade?
What's that suppose to mean, I'm a communist? Communists (especially those of the Marxist-Lenninist variety) push a pseudo-scientific worldview on how a state is suppose to be run. They're just as bad as the far-right jerkoffs. I don't know, but if they did, you'd still pretend they didn't anyway.
Even if they did, they'd still be dipshits, for obvious reasons. This isn't "pretending" so much as being "aware" of their bullshit.