the sounds of different balls

I was thinking about how different balls have different sounds.  Maybe we should collect some field recordings of different balls and test people for if they know how the balls sound.  Please imagine the sound of ping pong balls bouncing.  Distinctive, isn't it.  Now imagine the basketball.  Really smacks, doesn't it.  Perhaps someone has analyzed the sound characteristics and has programmed a ball sound synthesis player.  You could specify different ball parameters and the player outputs the sound that the ball would have.

this thread is now for ball onomatopoeiae

pingleball: pink-pink
basketlball: bamf bamp
billiandnrbal: stokstok

scrotum: slap slap slap slap slap slapslapslap SLAPSLAPSLAP*UGGGHHH*

The sound is irrelevant. What really matters is the world's oldest question:

How long does it take for piss to land on balls?

>>4
depends on the length and girth of the wiener, and the chemical properties, amount, velocity, and angle of the piss relative to the balls

look up simple newtonian mechanics and learn about projectile motion if you want to be able to accurately answer that question

>>5
So it's a function? Like this?

f(W_l,W_g,C,q,v,θ_rel)

>>6
Near enough, but there would need to be many assumptions made.

Model it as to sphere moving inside a bag, so you have to include mechanical properties of the ballsack, I would just model the balls as on simple strings and factor the resistance of their container ie your hairy sack as the environmental resistance ie viscosity.  This is to make the calculation not overly complicated.

Two pendulum systems, connected on a rod are complex and require   far too many differential equations for my liking.

>>5
look up simple newtonian mechanics

Two pendulum system is not technically simple Newtonian mechanics.
Ie the system will be non-linear.

>>8
fine, then look up quantum mechanics

herpaderp

>>9
only useful if the balls were particles



herpederpydot

>>9
quantum mechanics
Are you saying that piss can tunnel to the balls?

halp my balls are quantumly entangled

>>11
Tunneling is less likely for larger molecules, but by no means impossible just the probability of the wave front considerably lower.

How long does quantum tunneling take? How long does it take for piss to quantum tunnel to balls?

What do balls sound like in space?

>>15
No one can hear you ball in space