/lounge/ - DEATH BY JERKIN IT

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 12:20

"The male highschool student from was found dead in his room, wearing no pants or underwear... according to doctors, his testis were found to have secreted an abnormal volume of sperm, causing the boy to die from cardiac arrest after his brain became over excited... an autopsy confirmed that the boy had masturbated over 20 times over the course of the day, and that the massive secretion of sexual hormones is what caused his death..."

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 16:00

I am a doctor, and that story could not happen.

Name: VIPPER 2010-09-21 16:22

There is this swiss dude, he jerked it 31 times in one day, he holds the record in world guiness book i think.

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 17:11

>>4
How do you define a "jerk"?

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 22:07

>>4
Until you SHOOT THE THICK ROPES.

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 22:16

>>5
How do I shot rope?

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 23:53

>>6
How do you get Back to the imageboards, please?

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 1:34

How do you define "thick"?

Seems like a really dubious record to me.

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 2:14

Hi there, welcome to Fancypants Boarding School

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 3:08

>>9
Actually I'm just an enthusiastic masturbator. I just don't like that guy getting the recognition when I'm pretty sure I could break that record if I wanted (and I knew what the rules were).

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 15:45

>>1
an autopsy confirmed that the boy had masturbated over 20 times over the course of the day

Lies, right there.

Autopsies show no such thing; like there's a litle clock in your cock showing how many times you fapped.

Bollocks (if you'll excuse the pun).

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 12:39

>>11
compare the semen count in the testes, there is data for the amount of semen released in an average session - extrapolate find the number of jerk sessions

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 17:11

>>12

Logical error: Fallacy of Presumption

... or Phallacy (if you'll excuse the pun)

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 17:31

>>13
Phaillacy or phallusy?

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 23:41

Bullshit, high testosterone will not kill an adolescent, at least not in natural levels. That and after the 3rd or 4th ejaculation he was "running on empty". And the brain cannot be "overexcited" and cause cardia arrest. Totally different systems as far as sexual vs cardiac...

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-24 0:31

>>15
I agree. As an experienced masturbator, I can assure you that what the OP has described is superhuman in nature.

Name: Anonymous 2010-09-28 2:44

I assume the people who did the autopsy decided after seeing that is balls were empty that he must have jerked it 20 times. I say if its empty I think we should assume 6000 only seems reasonable.

This is all total bullshit. Fuck you I'm gonna jerk it 21 times may God strike me down if this is the truth.

DEATH BY JERKIN IT

1 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 12:20

2 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 16:00

3 Name: VIPPER 2010-09-21 16:22

4 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 17:11

5 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 22:07

6 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 22:16

7 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-21 23:53

8 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 1:34

9 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 2:14

10 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 3:08

11 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-22 15:45

12 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 12:39

13 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 17:11

14 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 17:31

15 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-23 23:41

16 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-24 0:31

17 Name: Anonymous 2010-09-28 2:44