/lounge/ - crazy shit that Jesus said

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 1:22

He said that we should fuck our enemies. Not figuratively, either. Actually use our penises.

He called a fig tree a "jew tree" because it wouldn't give him any figs.

He said that if someone smacks your cheek, you should let him smack your other three cheecks, and nut sack.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 1:53

wwwwwwwwww

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:22

>>1
i do not know wihch verson of the bible you are using for these qotes but i think it i sa bad translation because jesus never said those things. also he spoke aramaic or hebrew or greek so any enlgish bible is not accurate anwyay.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:24

Well it's paraphrase you see.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:41

Those crazy mexicans, what will they say next.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 4:44

>>5
Not.....that kind of Jesus.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 6:34

HAY ZEUS

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 14:06

He told his dinner guests that the food tasted so good because it was made out of Jesus.

Name: Jesus 2010-03-24 16:06

Hey guys! Jesus here. Just dropped by to verify that I totally said that.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 17:20

>>9
The role is admitted!

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 18:06

>>4
You're a paraphrase.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 18:44

>>11
?

Name: BBCodeMaster !!ZgQzEQdSVZyrqw5 2010-03-24 19:27

B^B ~~C~~_ode _M^ast_e^rs ^Sm^o_ke W_eed.

Marijuana MUST be legalized.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 19:30

>>13
GTFO weed spammer.

Name: Jesus 2010-03-24 19:39

>>13
I don't recall saying that. Why would you need that? I already gave you all my delicious intoxicating blood.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 23:39

>>13
pothead MUST be jailed

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 23:57

>>16
You know how many people are in jail already, that shit's expensive. A rope, on the other hand, is cheap and reusable.

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-25 0:49

hung by his own hemp rope

Name: Anonymous 2010-03-25 2:13

He said that camels are too big to serve as a thread, as for darning socks, which weren't even invented yet.

He spoke the words that were later used as the chorus of the "I'm my Own Grandpa" song.

I like to think of you guys as my sheep (I like sheeps).

crazy shit that Jesus said

1 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 1:22

2 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 1:53

3 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:22

4 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:24

5 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 2:41

6 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 4:44

7 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 6:34

8 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 14:06

9 Name: Jesus 2010-03-24 16:06

10 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 17:20

11 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 18:06

12 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 18:44

13 Name: BBCodeMaster !!ZgQzEQdSVZyrqw5 2010-03-24 19:27

14 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 19:30

15 Name: Jesus 2010-03-24 19:39

16 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 23:39

17 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-24 23:57

18 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-25 0:49

19 Name: Anonymous 2010-03-25 2:13