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Crazy huge dude

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 0:17

Ok, my ex girlfriend is going out with this crazy-ingly huge muscled dude and he wants to kick my ass and I am puny and scared. So I need to know where and how I can get a knife that is small and how I can carry it around my body at all times as to use it in case of defense (and defense only!).

I'm seriously scared and hope you guys can tell me how I can do this?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 0:43

Make a T-1000 and program it to target the crazy, huge dude for termination. It will form its hand into a point and take care of him for good.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 0:49

>>2
I'm being serious here. I wanna know how I can do this?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 0:54

Hard choice between gettinig your ass kicked and going to jail for stabbing some guy. Well if he doesn't take the knife from your weak ass and stab you with it. Your best bet was not to have gotten in to this situation.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 0:56

>>3
I was being serious, too.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 1:15

Um, so why does this guy want to come beat you up?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 1:16

>>1
pay some dude to be your bodyguard

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 1:17

>>1
pay some spanish or nigger gagnsta to kick his ass good

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 1:29

>>4
>>6

Because He is going out with my ex-girlfriend so I'm 'Some kind of a bad guy' or something... Probably because he is jealous of me or some crap.

And I'd rather go to jail because I knifed someone then be dead! So Tell me how to get a good knife and how to hold in on my body somehow!

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 1:53

Call the cops, HElp some huge guy gonna kick my arse

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 2:11

You go to jail and you get butt raped.

However, if you kill the guy in self defence, you get off. No problem :D.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 4:39

Stick a firepoker in his eye.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 5:16

I prefer the crowbar to the shank.
But you should use- the screwdriver, trust me, thrust that shit in his bulge and he'll be in too much pain to move let alone be able to lay a finger on you before you're able to stab him with it again, and this time in a more effective place since he'll be easier to hit in said places, a good second spot to hit would be from the following: the neck, the heart, the cranium, the eyes, and the abdomen.
Hope it helps.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 5:17

Oh, and fucking use a phillips head not that flathead shit, you'd have to be a retard to use a flathead, unless you're strong enough to put that shit through flesh, then it would be the superior choice for when you twist it after it has entered and as it is leaving it will leave quite the fucked up internals, but you said you were puny so definitely stick with phillips.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 5:54

>>1
Get a gun and shoot him if he physically attacks you and self-defense is legal where you live.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 6:44

The best defense is a good offence.

Find out where that motherfucker lives and slit his throat while he sleeps.

Or you could just get a bunch of your friends and beat the shit out of him. Either way is good.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 6:56

>>16
That gets you on jail though. However you get him came for you and shoot him then it's self defense.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 8:52

The muscle man has the brute and strength to kick your ass, but you have the brains to defeat him with pre-arranged tactics and careful planning.

First get out a map of the area where you will most likely encounter your enemy. Then look for safe havens, hiding places and escape routes. 

i suggest using pepper spray for counter attacks, when you spray him he will be vulnerable, you can either choose to kick him in his weak point, or run like hell.



Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 9:32

>>14


Lol @ person pretending he's all tough and shit because and knows all about stabbing people with screwdrivers.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 12:37

>>18
>>13
Thanks for the help guys, im seriously scared!

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 12:53

Ask Chuck Norris for help

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 14:03

>>18
What is he has muscles and brains?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 14:40

>>22
Then defeat him WITH MIIIIIND BULLETS!!!!

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:02

>>1
        Buy a pack of cigarettes and a bottle of rubbing alcholol.  put the cigarettes at the bottom of a bowel and pour the alcohol on top until they are completely covered.  wait for all the alcohol to evaporate and you have a black sludge at the bottom of the bowel.  The sludge is a highly concentrated mixture of all the nicotine and other toxins that were in those cigarettes.  Take a needle and coat it with the shit.  poke im with the needle.  This will cause a heartattack in about 15-20 seconds.  the toxins will disolve in the blood and be untraceble, and if he smokes it will be absolutely undetectable anyways.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:03

>>24
      I actually have no idea if this actually works, I just read it in a book or something.  Doesn't sound completely farfetched.  And no I don't suggest actually doing it.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:48

>>24
Will do someday :)

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:56 (sage)

>>19
Come, let me show you all of my knowledge about the screwdriver insertion.
It's not a matter of being tough, its a matter of needing to kill a motherfucking shithead, one such as yourself.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:58

lol, you people are all over thinking this junk.  You don't need a gun or a knife or poison needles.  Here are a few better ideas:

-Keys.  Hold them in your hand and use them to slash.  Or attach them to a lanyard so you can swing them like a mace, the more mass the better.

-Walking stick/cane/umbrella.  Great for poking, and swinging.  Your best bet in a confrontation would be to poke him in the stomach from a distances and then strike him while he's out of breath.  You may also wish to consider keeping a baseball bat in your car.

-Box cutter.  Easily concealable and you can keep it hidden until the moment you strike.  Better than a knife because the courts probably won't consider it a "deadly weapon."  Just don't try to cut his throat or neck.

-Pocket full of change.  wtf can change do?  Pull out a handful of change and throw it at his face.  I might not hurt him, but it will distract him long enough for you to attack or start running (but you better hope you're quick enough).

-Roll of nickels.  Hold them in your hand to add extra mass.  Essentially the same effect as brass knuckles, though not quite as good.

-Can't fight?
Don't yell for help.  Yell "FIRE!"  People are more likely to come if they here fire.
Also, try screaming something like, "I can't breathe!"  It's unexpected and your assailent might be so surprised that he may stop whatever he's doing long enough for you to kick him in the balls and run.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 15:59

>>25 what kind of book contains stuff like this?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 16:01

>>29
       The kind read by people like me.

                  I hope that answers all your questions.  I don't remember what book it was in.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 16:10



                  22 WAYS TO KILL A MAN WITH YOUR BARE HANDS
     1. TEMPLE - A very susceptibile vital spot.  If struck with sufficient
     force, may cause unconsciousness or death.

     2. NASION - This is the summit of the nose.  If struck with sufficient
     force may cause death.

     3. PHILTRUM - This is the area between the upper lip and the bottom of
     the nose.  Attack to this area may also cause unconsciousness or
     death.

     4. HOOK TO JAW - A powerful hook punch to the front side of jaw may
     snap an enemy's neck.  Fatal.

     5. ADAM'S APPLE - A sharp blow here may cause enemy to asphyxiate.

     6. SOLAR PLEXUS - The small of back.  May cause death.

     7. TESTICLES - The strong, focused pain of a vicious low blow may
     cause shock, resulting in death.

     8. BASE OF CEREBELLUM - A powerful blow to the nape of the neck,
     causing mortal damage.

     9. COCCYX - A powerful blow to the tail bone.  Fatal.

     10. FULL NELSON - Stand behind the enemy, put your arms under his, and
     lock your hands behind his head.  Bending the neck forward may either
     break neck, asphyxiate enemy, or cut of supply of spinal fluid to
     brain, causing brain damage or death.

     11. HALF NELSON - Again, standing behind enemy, but one arm is used to
     pin one of enemy's arms.

     12. BRAIN BUSTER - Bend enemy over towards you, placing him in a
     headlock.  Grab the back of his belt, and haul him into the air,
     vertical, upside-down.  Allow yourself to fall backward, landing on
     your enemy's head, which will absorb your combined weight.  Most
     effective on concrete or gravel.

     13. RUSSIAN OMELET - Cross enemy's legs.  Fold enemy by pinning his
     shoulders to ground upside-down and placing his legs above him.  Sit
     on his legs, folding the bass of the spine.  Fatal.

     14. HEART PUNCH - A strongman's attack, it is simply a powerful blow
     to the heart.  (Many years ago, the wrestler Ox killed an opposing
     wrestler with this attack.)

     15. UPPERCUT - An upward strike to the bottom of the jaw with the heel
     of the hand, causing the enemy's head to snap backward.  May shatter
     vertabrae. Fatal.

     16. ABDOMEN - A substantial blow to this area may rupture a vital
     organ, causing death.

     17. RIB CAGE - A vicious shattering of the rib cage may cause grave
     internal bleeding.

     18. HEAD-TO-WALL PUNCH - A swift, hard, cold-cock punch to an enemy's
     face while he is standing near a wall may drive his head into it,
     causing the back of the skull to shatter fatally.

     19. PINNED DROP KICK - Standing behind enemy, holding his arms
     straight back.  A drop kick to the back without releasing arms may
     severe spine, causing death.

     20. HEAD WRENCH - Grabbing an enemy's head by the mouth and the back
     of the skull, then twisting with a sudden, violent jerk to rend
     vertabrae, may easily cause death.

     21. CHOKE HOLD - Once a favorite of law enforcement officials, has
     often proved deadly.  The right arm goes over the enemy's right
     shoulder, and grips the back of the head.  The left arm comes over his
     left shoulder, reaches across neck, and grabs own right forearm.  With
     enough pressure applied, causes brain damage or death.

     22. HEAD YANK - Bend enemy forward, grab head, and pull back with
     convincing force.  May seperate delicate vertebrae, causing death.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 16:14

>>31
also available at anonymous's bookstore:
US Navy Seal Physical Fitness Guide.pdf
Tactics_and_self_defense_for_the_modern_protestor.pdf
martial_arts-Pressure_points.pdf
Hand to Hand Combat.pdf
Hand Combat and Pressure Points.pdf
Booby_traps.pdf
101_ways_to_kill_someone.txt
interesting_ways_to_kill_a_friend.txt
poison_your_neighbors.txt
The_Big_Book_of_Mischief.txt
and much more !!

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 16:46

>>31
That stuff won't work for >>1

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 18:42

>>32
where you get that stuff?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 20:10

>>28
helping much too. thanks!

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 21:28

>>12
>>13
>>14
>>16
>>24
>>28
>>31
My God, you people are violent. Especially >>21 and >>23.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-25 22:19

tell him that you would suck his cock and you let him put it in your pooper
that usually works =n_n=

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-26 21:34

SO HOW IT WHEN?
YOU MUST BE DEAD RIGHT NOW lolololol

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-27 8:23

>>28
rofl i personally like the walking stick one.

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-27 10:51

INTERNET TOUGH GUYS ITT

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-27 11:13 (sage)

Ugh.. Killing will only lead to more killing mmkay?

Name: Anonymous 2006-06-27 12:16

i say go ninja on his ass and stab in the artery!!

Name: Sgt.Kabu끖kiman㡑 2012-05-27 0:47

All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy
All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy

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