How many times have your parents caught you masturbating? My mother has walked in on me twice... :(
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OmegaZero2005-04-03 16:28
No. I wash them and reuse them for just that.
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j-dogg!dRRlMWbjxo2005-04-03 18:12
I've never been caught myself, but I did catch my old roommate's sister one time. Neither of use made a big deal about it. I'm pretty sure she wanted to get caught, cuz we hooked up later on and several times since.
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j-dogg!dRRlMWbjxo2005-04-03 18:12
I've never been caught myself, but I did catch my old roommate's sister one time. Neither of use made a big deal about it. I'm pretty sure she wanted to get caught, cuz we hooked up later on and several times since.
Kids, if you live at home, you are WAY too young to be collecting porn
And to the guys who use dildos, please kill yourselves!
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Anonymous2005-04-22 11:54
46 GET!
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Anonymous2005-04-24 17:42
Not directly, but I kinda suck at cleaning up after myself :(
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Anonymous2005-04-28 13:26
I think I fucked up sex for myself because I jerk it only for the endorphine rush and nothing else. Porn is like, eh.
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Anonymous2005-05-03 14:25
>>45
lol silly westerner fallacies.
"WE WANT CHILDREN! MANY CHILDREN! BUT WE ACTUALLY HATE THEM AND WILL EITHER KICK THEM OUT OR KILL THEM! WE MAKE NO SENSE!"
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York2005-05-04 5:47
When I was a teenager, spice came in scrambled-the audio was perfect, but the video was just screwed up enough that you could make out the various titty and undulations if you got lucky. So I'd fap to that, sound low and trigger finger on the previous channel button. I was very careful. If I suspected movement outside my door, not only did I hit a previous channel, but I would change the channel ONCE MORE so I couldn't be traced. In fact this worked out once. My dad busted in my room with his remote, and hit previous channel. went to something harmless. He looked at me. "Good work." He left me alone after that. I guess he respected my attention to detail. XD
If you did the thing with prev. chan + chan change as well lemme know.
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Anonymous2005-05-05 5:21
>>50
your dad tried to proactively catch you wanking... that's pretty creepy
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Anonymous2005-05-05 15:21
>>50
This wasn't a masturbation situation, but it involved the porn stations on our television.
One night my parents went out of town for a couple days, leaving just my brother and I alone in the house. I was busy in the kitchen watching television and eating dinner and my brother was in the livingroom watching television. As I sat there eating I'd note that every once and awhile there'd be an odd scilence from the livingroom, the usual television noises just stopping for a few minutes and then starting back up before I'd have a chance to see what was on. Eventually my brother went downstairs to his bedroom and I wandered into the livingroom and hit the Previous Channel button. Lo and behold there was the Playboy channel, with a pay per view movie in progress. Flipping through the channels real quick I dicovered that all the porn channels had a PPV movie going. Checking the past purchases menu I discovered more than 40 bucks in porn had been payed for that night.
Now, not being one to waste a good thing I went right ahead and bought a few more and sat down to watch three or four porn movies at once. About a half hour later I flipped back through the channels and went to bed. The next morning I was greeted to an angry knock at my door, it was my mother. It seems my brother had gotten up as soon as they returned and ratted me out before I had gotten the chance to do so to him. Idiot. So it was now time to bring my greater size and strength into the equation. In the quiet of our basement bedrooms I quickly cornered him and wrapped my fingers around his throat, forcing him to agree to take the entire blame for the movies[the majority of which /were/ his]
I got off scott free and he got grounded for a month.
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Anonymous2005-05-14 19:32
i have never been caught
i am a master masturbator
'I have no damn lock and I busted up the hinges on my door, which gets annoying when it's windy out, thing falls over all the time.'
Dude, do you live in a shed or something?
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Anonymous2005-05-29 12:39
AGE
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Anonymous2005-05-30 14:13
it doesnt seem to occur to my family that walking into my room at any time of the night is A-O-K!
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Anonymous2005-05-30 14:18
I like to masturbate in the shower, doesn't matter where you spray your cum, it's beautiful.
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Anonymous2005-05-30 14:33
locks on doors = 0!
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Anonymous2005-05-30 18:33
The fact I can get caught anytime turns me on more
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Anonymous2005-06-04 23:25
I have no sex drive whatsoever. Therefore, it's impossible for me to be caught 'cuz I never do it (or anything else, for that matter) in the first place. I AM WIN.