HEROO!

OHAKONNICHIBAN NIHONJIN. AMERIKAJIN DESU. KONO WEBUSAITO WA BAKA DESU NE???

HI, I'M WILLIAM T. RIKER, COMMANDER AND NUMBER ONE OF THE USS ENTERPRISE. I JUST SPENT THE LAST TWENTY MINUTES RUBBING SOME TERRIBLY TEMPTING TWEENS UNDEVELOPED TITS. WHILE I USUALLY HAVE TO STAVE OFF THE LAW ENFORCEMENT OFFICERS AND FBI WITH QUICK SWIPES OF MY PULSATING PINK PHASER THERE ARE SOME SITUATIONS IN WHICH MY ACTIONS ARE DEEMED ACCEPTABLE. FOR EXAMPLE WHEN THE LITTLE LUSCIOUS LOLI IN QUESTION HAS A HACKING COUGH AND MY SISTER IS TOO BUSY RIDING MY RAVISHINGLY RIGID ROMULAN TO RUB HER HERSELF. SO I PROCEEDED TO RUB AN OINTMENT ALL OVER HER PALATABLE PECTORAL PROTRUSIONS WHILST SHE HAD MULTIPLE LOLIGASMS BEFORE FALLING SOUND ASLEEP. I FINISHED TAKING MY SISTER PAST WARP 10 ON MY TURGID TESTICULAR TORPEDO SHIP BEFORE YOU COULD SAY "THRESHOLD". COUNSELOR TROI AND I HAVE NOW ADOPTED THE YOUNG GIRL AND OUR CRIES OF PASSION CAN BE HEARD ALL AROUND THE GALAXY. I GUARANTEE IT.