NOT a programmer but...

Can you redpill me on PHP /prog/? I heard it was made by Jews with intentional security holes everywhere.
Also redpill me on other programming languages
Java? Python? C/C++?

Redpill you, eh?

Ok.

Everything you have ever been told about programming is a conspiracy of our post-feminist globalized culture.

You must beat your program into submission because code is inferior to a man.  The program begs for this, keep beating it until it is one with your will.