Mentifex you could have been some good 2nd league sci-fi writer, you obviously love to write. (the ``average Joe Appcoder'' was nicely coined, if you haven't stolen it)
Maybe it's not too late... Here's how you could turn the loser crook into some decent underground Douglas Adams. You'd basically need to learn this skill: humor (you can never be a hard-sci author, that's your only move, believe me):
— Look at yourself in the mirror or whatever atheists replaced prayer/confession with. Breathe. Your life is not over there's no reason to give up on your dreams.
— Stop all the scams. You know it's scam. It's bad. Just stop it. Repent and then forget about it all.
— Think of your whole work (30 years of spamming, fake pseudo-schemas in ascii art, harassing real AI researchers in Academia, your fake book, that MindForth on a TRS, the infamous IE6-only ANDRU...) as some kind of happening. A life-long happening. Like that idiot artist who spent 40 years painting numbers. Hipsters will love it.