Turning to crime

I am unemployable, morbidly obese loser. Due to a couple sexual harassment lawsuits a few years back, I cannot find a job anywhere. All I have is about £200, a masters in computer science, and a desire to live a more expensive life. As such, I've been thinking about becoming a criminal to get money. I'm thinking of buying a gun, and maybe selling drugs. I'm not a good fighter, so I'll probably only sell to schoolchildren. What do you think? Would this be a good career path for a SICP master to take?

>>3
He is typical. I'm too a SICP master, but I have no CS degree. The only way I can support myself is by committing crimes, like eating cats and stray dogs, because nobody wants to employ a Lisper. They all want only PHP.