`>2050 `>After the civil war, the military demarcation line between the Imperium of god-emperor obama and the Stormfront legions goes literally straight through my house. `>Jn order to make sure I follow both laws, there are black-trans-lesbian-muslim police looking through half of the windows, andp ure-white-aryan-male-christian skinheads looking through the other half. `>wake up in my bedroom on the Imperial side. Since I am black, I have been allowed to sleep in for 5 minutes. `>must immediately bow down and pray to mecca where Obama’s new home is. `>Must simultaneously declare all religions to be false since I am an atheist. `>take estrogen pills on my nightstand. `>slowly shuffle to the bathroom. not walking too quickly so as to check my fast privilege. `>not allowed to stand while I pee since it is degrading to women. `>sink is on the stormfag side. `>when I turn is on, water is a sort of brownish yellow, since the clean water has been allotted for white families, I get it when they’re done. `>go down to kitchen, also on the stormfag side. `>My table has been taken overnight since my white neighbor accidentally broke his because of the weight of all of the food that he recieved in his rations. `>open refrigerator, food has been spoiled since the Grand wizard of the Ku Klux Kouncil decided that blacks shouldn’t have too much power. `>make meal of stale cornbread and spoiled milk as per my rations. `>eat food standing. notice that I have accidentally wandered onto the imperial side `>lakwadiniqua brigade breaks into my house (the 4th amendment has long since been repealed) and begin to beat me with nightstick for not checking my able-bodied privilege, but not too hard, since beating black people would be racist. `>hand me a ticket for $300, then immediately give me a welfare check for the exact same amount even though I have a job. `>Not like it matters since hyperinflation has made $300 into pocket change. `>Walk into garage, and sit down in government approved smart-electric-hybrid-lowrider car. `>realize I left the keys in the kitchen. `>retrieve keys. stormfags hop through window and smash my face into the floor for stealing jewelry and attempting to steal a car. `>crawl back into car, start engine, only radio station is arabic rap singing the praises of emperor obama. `>pull out of driveway, into stormfag zone. `>am immediately stopped by police, cop pulls me out of the car, bashes my head into the pavement, calls me a car stealing nigger. then puts 3 lbs of crack into my pocket. `>that makes me a repeat offender. `>luckily, he smashed my face into the imperial side, so lakwandisha pulls me into the hospital to receive my free medical care. `>along with repairing my face and giving me new teeth, the doctors turn inject me with triple my daily dose of estrogen instead of using painkillers, in order to check my “not allergic to morphine privilege” `>leave hospital, get on my government issued bicycle `>path to work leads me back to stormfag zone. `>not allowed to ride bike or walk on the white’s only sidewalk, the white’s only road, or the white’s only grass. have to do a sort of bunny hop on the bike. `>arrive at job as correctional officer at the imperial/stormfront criminal rehabilitation facility. `>realize I entered on the stormfront side. can only leave my bike on the “colore& section of the parking lot which was paved in broken glass from Kristallnacht 2038, which didn’t happen. `>walk barefoot since niggers aren’t allowed to have shoes. `>get to entrance. realize that although the pavement is for colored, the sidewalk is white’s only, so I can’t get to the door. `>turn back, get a running start and jump over the sidewalk and in front of the door. `>overshoot it, land on the imperial side. `>get my legs broken by guards for not checking my able-bodied privilege, but only one leg since I’m black and they don’t want to be racist. `>Begin first shift on the imperial side. my job is to anally violate white men who refused to check their privilege, even though I’m not gay. `>Don’t want to appear homophobic, so I have to rape a white man who held a door open for an independent womyn. `>during break, I’m allowed to have sex with their white wives, but it’s no fun since all of the white women are trans `>second shift is on the stormfag side. `>cross line into stormfag side of the ethnic relocation camp. which I must remind myself does not exist and never has. `>storm guards give me looks like i just whistled at a white woman. `>look down, realize that I forgot to change the armband on my government issued two-colored jumpsuit (think Two-Face from batman) from a Star of David and a Star and Crescent to a swastika and SS lightning bolts. `>bow down and apologize by licking the guards jackboots clean. `>they forgive me, but sodomize me with their nightsticks for getting too close ot a white man. `>accept my punishment, continue with shift, where my job is to crawl into the gas vents and remove the human remains. Must also remind myself audibly that the gas chambers are only to remove lice, and that they don’t even exist. `>dump bodies into massive hole in the ground. fill it with dirt with my bare hands since only white people may use shovels. `>one mass grave is filled, I attempt to return home. `>Reichsfuhrer-SS Anders Brevik calls me to his office. says that he has been watching me and that I will not be paid since i haven’t done any work during my shift. `>tell him that I just spent the last 3 hours cleaning gas chambers and filling graves. `>he laughs, and declares that the gas chambers, the graves, and in fact their entire half of the facility is just jewish propoganda and doesn’t even exist, therefore I couldn’t have worked on them. `>guards are watching me, so I agree and salute him. `>decide to exit through the imperial exit this time. `>since my co-workers are white and I’m black, I’m allowed to take any of their cars, `>drive back to my house. notice the locks have been changed. `>apparently my house has been sold to a pure Aryan lesbian Muslim while i was gone since both sides have decided that I hadn’t checked my privilege or respected whites enough. `>fall asleep on the sidewalk `>wake up in jail. `>apparently while I was sleeping, an attractive white woman walked past me. `>both sides agree that this is rape, punishable by “death by lynching on a rope made out environmentally friendly government approved recycled hemp.” `>my privilege has been checked.