Pro-Lisp Bigotry

I was part of a team writing an web-based job application and screening system (a job kiosk the customer called it) and my team and our customer signed on to implementing this job kiosk using Windows, Apache, PHP5, and the ZendFramework -- everyone except one of our team members, who I will refer to as "Joe". Joe kept advocating the use of Lisp throughout the technology deliberation phase, even though the customer made it quite clear that he expected the vast majority of the job kiosk to be implemented using an enterprise quality technology and all the validation should be done using industry practices.

The fact that the customer signed off on this, however, did nothing to deter Joe from advocating Lisp -- abrasively. Every time our project hit a bump in the road, Joe would go off on some tirade on how much easier our lives would be if we were only writing this job kiosk in Lisp. Joe would constantly bicker about how we were all doing this all wrong because we weren't doing it in Lisp, not even bother to learn the technologies we were actually using, and, whenever fellow teammates would try and gently bring him back into the fold (usually via email), Joe would just flame the poor guy. At the height of Joe's pro-Lisp bigotry, he would regularly belt off comments like, "Well, if we had only done it in Lisp," to such an extent that the team would have been better off if he had just quit (or was reassigned or fired.)

Man understands a better way of life.
This enlightenment is bigotry.

windows server and zend framework sounds disgusting, poor joe

Jim?

>>2
If you tolerate even one developer whom the other developers think is a problem, you'll hurt the morale of the good developers. You are implying that not only do you expect your team members to give their all; you expect them to do it when their co-workers are working against them.

>>5
I generally hire for cultural fit. I would much rather have a good fit personally than get the best Java/C#/Perl developer. If the basic skillset is there and they mesh with the team, I'll pick them over the 4.0, CS/Software engineering applicant that can't function in a team setting.

>>1
He was just trying to help them, just like psychiatrists sometimes have to force people to admit that they are sick.

>>5
What I want to know is how a programmer for hire doesn't do the job he was commissioned to do. If a client pays for the programmers to wear funny wigs while programming and the programmer disagrees, why is that programmer still working there? Shouldn't the programmer go away if he disagreed with the commission?

>>8
so you basically said if i hire you to suck my dick while programming you agree because it's what client wants

>>8
To be fair, in the fake-as-fuck parable, Joe did do the job, half-heartedly and with constant bickering, but he did it. The troll post is more about how working in a team, for clients, requires equanimity and charity, as to truly be of help one has to accept the needs of who you assist, and to work with others one must have at least a modicum of courtesy as to spare them from theatrics such as these.

On the other hand, Joe should not work for a company which considers PHP to be ``enterprise quality'' disregarding the obvious connotation of the word here, when its release process lacks the least of QA, to say nothing of its design and implementation, as evidenced by their 5.3.7 release with a broken implementation of crypt. If you want Enterprise, you go with a Java Turnkey Solution or .Net, nothing less.

ENTERPRISE QUALITY bump and ((dubs)).

Oh, god, this story is based on a real one:

http://www.codinghorror.com/blog/2008/07/dealing-with-bad-apples.html

Now I feel dirty for visiting Jeff Atwood's blog. Now, truly, IHBT.

>>12
You're a bad apple. Jeff would have fired you.

>>12
eww, that usual sweating system management crap. you should always smile, you should work with your team, you should be friendly, you should be loyal to your company blah blah blah

>>14
In general, you should suck circumcised Jewish cock.

php is shiiiiiiii111iiiiiiit

If it ain't Lisp, it's fucking crap.

>>6
Hey guy, you're a dick. Why can't you just assign me a task and let me get it done alone, like in college. Those other people talk to much anyway and always want to go out drinking or argue about politics.

Also, fuck pair programming.

>>6
No wonder all we get now are ``social media web startups'' written in Javashit.

>>8
If a client pays for the programmers to wear funny wigs while programming
Where can I find these programmer Touhous?

Why would you go with Windows and then use Apache and PHP instead of IIS and ASP?

>>21
Because those are shit.

>>22
All five products on that list are shit.

>>22
Then why use Windows? That's like deciding to pay shitloads of money for Redhat Linux just so you can install Wine and run Visual Studios.

>>23
Those are not products. Those are SOLUTIONS.

>>25
Oh, it's ENTERPRISE shit. I think I understand now.

I thought that maybe there was a valid reason for doing that.

>>24
Because "PHP now runs better than ever on Windows."
http://www.microsoft.com/web/platform/phponwindows.aspx

The lack of Lisp in a project in 2013 is non-kawaii, my condolences to Joe!

I think I would prefer writing C# inline in ASPX than PHP. I've never done it, but PHP is shit and fails to maintain even the slightest bit of consistency. Pure ASP\ASPX though, not a chance in hell. I'd rather be forced to indentatificate my code.

>>27
>phponwindows.aspx

-_-

>>29
Why microsoft.com is SO slow, if it runs C# - compiled statically typed language?

>>30
Because it doesn't run Haskell. Then it wouldn't work at all.

>>31
Microsoft is haskell.

>>32
lolol is ur dof is proprietary

Download microsoft visual haskell 2013 enterprise edition

I'll give Joe $500 to masturbate on camera for me.

>>33
U MENA SPYWARE

up

down

Zend is a Zen daemon

learn me some haskell real good

>>9
If it's in the contract you signed then on your knees cocksucker.

check 'em

lisp is great though

Nice dubs, >>42.  Oh wait...