Noob programer that wants to be pro-gr8-mer

Please give me good advice to learn the art of computing programing, I thanks you from the bottom bottom of my heart heart.

Thanks very much, please no troll or spam for more thanks （´・ω・｀）

Learn Haskell. If you're a small-minded toilet scrubber, it'll blow your mind. I, on the other hand, had no problem understanding monads, kinds, monadic I/O, and continuations.