Return Styles: Pseud0ch, Terminal, Valhalla, NES, Geocities, Blue Moon. Entire thread

Terrible[i]![/i] Jokes

Name: Anonymous 2012-04-14 5:15

Why did the Sussman cross the road?
To create a continuation on the other side.

Why couldn't Elie Wiesel play any Steam games?
He had a bad serial number.

Why did the lambda function wear a Guy Fawkes mask?
He was Anonymous.

Why do origami artists prefer Haskell?
The fold functions.

Why couldn't Stroustrup call anybody?
The operator was overloaded.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-11 2:28

>>64
back to /g/

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-11 3:40

>>63,65
Fuck off, ``faggot'', that was actually funny.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-11 4:21

What did Larry Wall get his wife for her birthday?
A Perl necklace.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-11 4:28

Larry -Wall

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-11 5:33

Why did the buffer object cross the bus? His GF was on the other side.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-16 23:29

Why are there no electronics on dead-end streets?
There's no outlet!

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:48

>>49,50
Well played.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:53

Why did Stallman get arrested for shoplifting in a liquor store?
Because he thought beer was free.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:54

What did the text under the spoiler say?                 

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:57

>>63,65
You must be GNU here.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:58

>>77
What did the int say to the float

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 1:58

>>76
Check my doubles.

Name: Anonymous 2012-08-17 2:05

>>78
When does the narwhal bacon?

>>78
Back to le reddit, ``please''.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-03 12:44

Did you know they made a movie about a Go optimizing compiler?
They called it Waiting for GO.EXE.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-03 14:14

>>79
Waiting for GO dot...
Brilliant!

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-11 1:00

What's the Unicode character for Java?
(‎ ㈽ ‎)    323D     PARENTHESIZED IDEOGRAPH ENTERPRISE

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-11 1:06

PARENTHESIZED
Sounds more like Clojure than Java...

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-19 15:38

Why are so many Mac users unemployed?
There's no more Jobs!

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-20 4:25

>>81
Ha!

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-20 7:08

Why BASH has such a quirky syntax?
Because commies perfectly clone capitalist ideas.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-20 7:14

Why RPN is Polish?
Because Jews write right-to-left.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-27 22:44

How did Holmes know that Watson is always constipated?
He always says ``No shit, Sherlock!''

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-27 22:58

>>86
I laughed pretty hard.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-27 23:24

Why did the Mac user turn himself in?
He saw ``You have stopped jobs'' on October 5, 2011.

Name: Anonymous 2012-09-28 1:35



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Name: Anonymous 2012-10-10 19:26

What do they call the Russian spammer on /prog/?
Ivan the Terrible!

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-10 19:40

>>91
I chortled.

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 1:12

>>91
"Ivan" is a Hebrew name.

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 3:52

>>93
Lol, guys, guys look, I think we've the only non-Russian on this board XDDDDD

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 3:52

>>94
*we've found

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 5:49

>>94
>>95
Shalom!

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 7:41

Salam, al-Ahmed.

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 8:39

✡ Asshalom alaikhem ✡

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 15:17

dubs

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-11 16:46

↑↑↑

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-12 0:47

``If C were a Jehovah's witness''

Knock knock

Who's ---
SEGMENTATION FAULT. CORE DUMPED.

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-20 20:28

Why aren't 12-year-olds or pedophiles allowed on 4chan?
Because they're fucking kids!

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-20 20:50

Why shouldn't you eat a whole apple?
You'll dump core!

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-20 20:52

>>103
Fuck you. I laughed.

Name: Anonymous 2012-10-20 22:18

Why did the origami artist never map?
Because he preferred to fold.
Why do anarchists like Haskell?
Because it has no state.

Why did the doctor prescribe Haskell?
Because it has no side-effects.

Why would I never use a car?
Because I get more out of a cdr.

~Desu

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-14 8:18

Why did the Pharaoh request Bitcoin for his Lisp interpreter?
Because he was building a pyramid Scheme.

Why did the web developer cross the road?
To get to the JavaScript conference on the other side.

How can you tell when you're in an autist's house?
Everything's cdr-coded.

What did one Redditor say about the other Redditor's peanut butter sandwich?
Not even jelly.

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-14 10:03

better one free on the heap than one heap on the free

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-16 12:33

Why do people smoke after sex?
Too much friction!

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-16 14:53

>>108
I don't get it!

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-20 12:04

What did the Sussman say to the bodybuilder?
``Do you even lambda lift?''

Name: Anonymous 2012-12-20 12:38

>>109
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mhQKM_MG26k

Name: Anonymous 2013-02-12 15:29

Why do computer scientists hate the Ω combinator?
It's impossible to type!

Name: Anonymous 2013-02-12 15:41

>>111
I'm glad such a shitty response killed the thread for a while.

Name: Anonymous 2013-02-12 15:43

Meanwhile, here's a choose your own punchline!

My dog's got no dictionary.

How does he spell terrible?

How does he spell? Terrilbe!

Name: Anonymous 2013-02-12 15:55

>>114
Terrible!

Name: Anonymous 2013-02-18 1:52

Who designed Lemote?
Sum Dum Goy.

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-10 1:39

What's the difference between a guy who shovels in the cold and a guy who spams /prog/?
The guy who shovels in the cold is a numb digger...

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-10 1:47

>>117
And the guy who spams /prog/ is a...?

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-10 3:05

who would shovel in the cold except a dumb nigger

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-10 5:55

ܫܼܠܡ ܠܟܘܢ>>98

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-13 0:18

>>121
For once the cartoon spam is relevant to the thread!

Name: Anonymous 2013-03-31 18:14

Why does Richard Stallman have a big nose?
Because air is Free.

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-01 12:41

Why does Simon Peyton Jones rotates the Universe to insert a lightbulb?
To avoid side effects.

Name: Funsize Funnies 2013-04-01 23:01

Simply Smiffy

Teacher : "Right, class. What's the capital of France?"

Smiffy raise up his hand.

Teacher : "ERM...okay, Smiffy. What's the answer?"

Smiffy : "F!"

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-01 23:21

My dog has half a nose.
How does he smell?
Poorly!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-02 1:52

My dog has slightly more than half a nose.
How does he smell?
Not half bad!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-02 2:23

My dog has a whole nose.
How does he smell?
Good!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-15 23:25

In Communism, you check your privilege.
In Capitalism, the privileged check YOU!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-15 23:48

>>58
I chuckled

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-16 0:25

In Soviet Russia, privilege checks you!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-16 8:24

In privilege Russia, Che viet socks you!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-16 8:24

In soviet /prog/, dubs check you!

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-16 16:46

There was this magnificent mathematical horse. You could teach it arithmetic, which it learned with no difficulty, algebrawas a breeze, it could even prove theorems in euclidean geometry, but when you tried to teach it analytic geometry, it wouldrear back on its hind legs, kick ferociously neigh loudly and make violent head motions in resistance.

The moral of this story is that you can't put Descartes before the horse.

Name: Anonymous 2013-04-17 0:21



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Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 1:23

Why does Irish Lisp only have eval?
Because no Irish need apply!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 4:48

>>160
tee hee!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 4:52

>>160
>>161
racist

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 6:13

>>160
Foreigners need an explanation!

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 7:07

>>163
No. Foreigners need to fuck off back to their shitty third world BBSes.

Name: Anonymous 2013-05-22 10:14

>>164
HUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUEHUE
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