Among ordinary people homosexual love was considered a dirty, dirty. In my country, homosexuals are very unhappy, and if they wish, may lie in wait, and for unnatural, according to Soviet law, love, could be imprisoned. I know the pianist, who was two years for sodomy
I once was a poet, and I reveled in the "Alexandrian Songs" and other poems by Mikhail Kuzmin, where sang the male lover, and which spoke of man's love.
The most persistent admirer was my red-headed singer from the restaurant "Theatrical" Avdeev. The restaurant is located directly opposite the windows of my apartment. Every evening when I was home, I could hear him golosochek, sang "Poor Heart Mother" and other songs polublatnye. Restaurant was small, gryaznenky sat there every night almost exclusively on their own. Among his regulars were thieves, gypsies from the outskirts of our Kharkov, and some other shady characters. I heard the voice of my singer in the summer of loud, life-size, in the winter - the muffled windows closed.
I had just moved to live with Anna - a beautiful gray-haired Jewish woman, and we lived together as husband and wife, I was a happy time, a good poem went, I was living a fun, drank a lot, I had a good coffee-colored English costume, I inherited not quite honestly, I walked a lot and saunter down the main street of the city with my friend - a handsome, Gennady, Genochkoy, the son of the director of the largest restaurants in our city.
Gene was a continuous delight. Idler, he saw his calling in carousing and partying, but luxurious. Ironically, it's almost indifferent attitude toward women. Even a meeting with the late ninth appeared, he seemed to love, he could barter for the trip with me to a country restaurant, which we call Monte Carlo, where luxury and prepared chicken tobacco. Friendship with Gena continued for several years until I went to Moscow. Gene and I were shalopaistye guys like fellinievskih guys from a country town.
The relationship with Gena, I think, was one of the faces of my innate homosexuality - for the sake of meetings with him, I ran away from his wife and mother in law, jumped from the second floor. I liked him very much, although we have not even embraced. I was all, as I now see, in the confused homosexual, but did not realize it.