COOL PROGRAMMING LANGUAGES

I need a programming language that makes me look really cool among programmers.
I need other programmers to see what I'm writing and go "Oh wow, that guy sure knows what he's doing".
Suggestions?

Lisp. Everyone knows thet lispers are either crazy or geniuses.

Also J. Or original APL. And haskell. Better to know them all.

Also make sure you know your position in "static vs dynamic types" holywar or no one will take you seriously.