The Great ONE WORD DESCRIPTION Game!

ITT: Describe the following programming languages with one word. If you don't know about one of the languages, just write NULL.

Java
Python
OCaml
Haskell
C
C++
Lua
VBScript
Javascript
PHP
ASP
Visual Basic
Pascal
Objective-C
Ruby
Perl
Scheme
Lisp
Shakespiere
Brainfuck
Assembly (generic)
Curve fitting (http://www.korokithakis.net/node/89)

Sure, I'll bite:

Java: boilerplate
Python: fun
Haskell: rigid
C: fast
C++: gotcha!
Lua: scripting
VBScript: kids
Javascript: incompatible
PHP: incompetent
Pascal: learner's
Objective-C: verbose
Ruby: fanboyish
Perl: noise
Scheme: pure
Lisp: tarpit