Bazaar considered harmful

The documentation of Bazaar^[1] states that Bazaar is slower than Git, has fewer features than Git, takes up more space than Git, is not as well documented as Git, is only used by newbies, and so on. It even says they don't believe Bazaar could be more successful than other SCM systems.

Clearly the Bazaar documentation must have been written by someone who is forced to use Bazaar but secretly loves Git.

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^{[1] http://doc.bazaar.canonical.com/migration/en/why-switch-to-bazaar.html}

>>13,14,16,18
>>12 here. I already have a master repository. It's hosted over ssh on a local server, and my developers each have a user account using git-shell. We push/pull from it like just like it's svn.

The reason I asked my question is because THE ENTIRE INTERNET keeps saying "you don't need a master repository, this isn't svn lol kthxbye". Except when I ask how I go about making this work, all four of you just now said "Duh, just make a master repository!"

Do you see the problem I am having now? See why this is frustrating? I want to get rid of this master repo because everyone keeps telling me I shouldn't have it, because git is not svn and is so much more powerful and blah blah blah. Do you see?