Paths to Enlightenment

It's helpful to think of programming languages as paths to enlightenment.

C is being a hermit in the desert. You eat grasshoppers and honey and learn to do everything with what you have.

C++ is self-flagellation locked in your chamber in the monastery. Surely if I try really hard while ignoring the pain, I will be enlightened. Re-examine my beliefs? Laughable! That would show lack of faith.

:TODO:
Python
Java
Lisp
Assembly
Delphi
J
Haskell
Smalltalk

When one walks the road of JavaScript long enough, one's thoughts begin to resemble those of FrozenVoid's. Eventually, those two minds will be so similar that it'd be impossible to tell them apart - at which point one realizes that such a horrible misshappening could only lead to one logical conclusion: we are all one and the same.