MySQL tutorials

Is there a MySQL book/tutorial that doesn't include the phrase ``Enterprise-Level SQL Features''?

I lurk here more than you will ever know, and find your BBCode shenanigans childish.

Your worship of Teh Sussman and SICP to be every bit distasteful as any other fundamentalists.

Furthermore all this is relatively new as in the last year or two, when the latest bunch of you faggots to bounce through here discovered 4Chan while in your freshmen year.