Will reading SICP help here?

I have no knowledge of computer programming and barely any of math. I want to write elegant non-shitty code for a variety of Purposes. Will this help? Is just starting in on it a good idea?

Thank you and sorry.

Yes. It will help you achieve Satori!

Yes. It will help you utilize industry-leading standards and practices to research, engineer, and deploy best-of-breed scalable turnkey enterprise solutions!

>>3
but I dun wanna breed turkeys

Are you GAY?
Are you a NIGGER?
Are you a GAY NIGGER?

If you answered "Yes" to all of the above questions, then GNAA (GAY NIGGER ASSOCIATION OF AMERICA) might be exactly what you've been looking for!