Perfect Language

So, I was looking at this thread http://dis.4chan.org/read/prog/1183997706/1-40 and all the various language bashing threads and was wondering... What, in the opinions of anonymous and 4chan in general, would make a perfect programming language? I am interested in both syntax and features and general flames, since they entertain me.

>>22
No, I am serious.  Or rather I'm ignorant.  I can understand the convenience of garbage collection, but as the saying goes "It is a logical impossibility to make a language more powerful by omitting features, no matter how bad they may be".  Manual memory management obviously allows for the option for garbage collection.

I actually know the answer to my own question too, well sort of.  The answer is along the lines: "there are things that are only reasonable to do if you have garbage collection (either automatic or custom written)."  What I'm asking is simply what those features are.  And why do these features make manual collection unreasonable for the entire language?

I honestly just don't know, but I know there is a good answer.