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PHP is a toy language

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 8:40

Discuss!

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 9:45

Indeed, php has some security "features".

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 10:10

A new PHP coders experience:
Day 1: This is like Perl just... without all the cool stuff :\
Day 2: Actually, it's not too bad. For web work it's actually very occasionally easier to use than Perl, and has less overhead (except for mod_perl, but that's a bitch)
Day 3: I miss all Perl's quote operators. Escaping things is a bitch :(
Day 4: It is becoming apparent that a lot of areas of PHP had little thought put into them. Functions behave inconsistently with each other, 'features' such as magic quotes are inconsistant, useless and annoying to real programmers, and in some cases cannot be turned off. Certain design decisions are seriously restricting me here...
Day 5: mysql_* sucks compared to DBI
Day 6: Argh. Random bugs in the interpreter and runtime environment. Argh!
Day 7: Programmer ports all the really heavy stuff to Perl and no longer has problems. Leaves all the super light web interface stuff in PHP.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 10:35

Your title is not correct:

this is a perl coder first php experience.

Besides. Nobody know what the fuck happens in perl code after it hasnt been read in 2 day's. Its too fucking cryptic. even more so with all the short anotations.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 11:23

php is fast for web

its fast, thats why

grandaddy perl can obviously do more, but thats not the point

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 11:24

>>4

Sure, if you're completely incompetent. Which would put you right in the intended user group for PHP.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 11:30

perl is king of monster script languages everyone knows it
and python is an evil bastard child

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 11:33

>>5

If you are saying its performance is fast, PHP and mod_perl perform roughly the same.

If you are saying you can quickly throw together a little app that grabs values out of a database and shows them on a page, sure, that's what a toy language is good for. For real work, you still want a real language.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 11:37

>>8
stock performance perhaps
google runs highly modded php

and yes, its very fast to slap toghether... php

Name: 2004-12-25 12:03 (capped)

Shiichan is the definition of very quickly slapped together PHP :v

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 12:13

phps motto: whatever works

ke ke

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 15:24

Perl is for people who like writing beautiful, artistic code that will serve as a testament to their creativity for generations.


Screw those people, I just want to be able to read the code and know what it does.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 15:48 (sage)

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 16:00

>>12
tmtowtdi~~

Name: 名無しさん 2004-12-25 16:02

We are >>1's courtiers. We are sorry that our lord has opened such a stupid THREAD.
After the last war we had completely lost, our lord got mental illness. Everyday, he kidnaps girls from the village. Every night he gets drunk and tries to chop courtiers with his katana.
Now the lady of the house is ill in bed. The people in our country are suffering badly from famine. The neighboring Daimyos is taking advantage of this situation, they try to pass across the border and take over our land.
Quite a few of our fellow courtiers have intention to rise in rebellion.
We are now in dire straits. Our clan would be destroyed.
But, don't worry. We arranged that our Lord become a Buddhist priest.
In his way to the temple, our skilled assassin should take his life.
That is arranged perfectly. After that we will hail Master Monaminokami, the nephew of our lord, as our new lord. We, all courtiers, would do our best to serve this new lord with faith.
We apologize for any inconvenience our lord may have caused you.
Pleas wait for a while. Pleas forgive the evil deeds done by our lord.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 16:03

what

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 16:17 (sage)

>>15 just won the thread, I'm afraid :|

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 16:23

>>12

If there is no creativity and no art in the act of programming, you might as well just be a plumber.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 17:37

At least plumbers make things work .

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 17:55

>>19
lool he called you a plumber!!!%

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 17:56

They also show their butt cracks. Do you want BUTT CRACKS all over your web site?

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-25 19:10

>>21 teh win

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 2:21 (sage)

PHP is a plain ugly hack. It's inconsistent, filled with an unholy number of functions, and the runtime is poor.

If you need a quick webpage maybe it'll do, but comparing it to a Real Language is a joke.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 3:40 (sage)

its specific to web - hackish by definition, no one claims its a 'real' language



Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 4:59 (sage)

Tell that to the PHP developers.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 6:45 (sage)

>>25 use the language thats suited for the purpose
web is php

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 7:02

what ever works best. use it. whocares if its teh h4x or not. cgi where cgi is due, php if php will do or javascript where the monkeys are down you through wonderign why you havnt done any changes you were supposed to do 10 years ago.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 14:57

>>18, there's a time for expressing yourself, and there's a time for getting work done. On a large project, "creativity" can be overdone.

>>23, Perl is a plain ugly hack too, yet it is apparently considered the god of all programming languages (unless you are Scheme/Ruby/Ocaml/PATH mark). I guess ugly hacks age like wine sometimes.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 15:05 (sage)

Perl _is_ an ugly hack. But it sure beats PHP in syntactic beauty. Anything beats PHP.

Of course we could all wax on why nobody uses Scheme/Ruby/OCaml, but that's life.

Name: Fnordulicious 2004-12-26 15:51

Perl is the only language which can parse Perl.

It doesn't get any worse.

Nuff said.

Name: Fnordulicious 2004-12-26 16:01

BTW, all scripting languages are toys. If it doesn't compile to machine code better than can be written by hand, the language is a toy.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-26 19:41 (sage)

By extension C is a toy?

I hope that was sarcasm.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-27 0:25

ASP owns your face. :/

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-27 14:02

>>32
yes, it was sarcasm

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-28 2:54 (sage)

Give me Ada over PHP anyday.

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-28 2:56 (sage)

lol ruby

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-28 10:51

PERL == Pathologically Eclectic Rubbish Lister

Name: Anonymous 2004-12-28 17:20

PHP == Penis Homo Penis olololololol

Name: Random Anonymous Fucktard 2004-12-28 17:52 (sage)

Are the functions touching?

Name: Zzzzz 2004-12-28 22:44

Bah, I use php AND perl every day.  And Java.

Java's great if you're writing a huge app.  If you're writing a three-liner, there's nothing like taking 15 damn minutes turning it into a class and filling in all the other crap to make it a program.

Perl's great for quick and dirty stuff but DBI is a nightmare.  I guess when you try to have a single interface to every database possible, it has to be the lowest common denominator.  At least with the mysql_* (or in my case, pg_*, though this could be a thread of its own) I get to use the full power of my chosen database.  DBI can't even do large data blobs properly.

If I'm not using a database, its embperl all the way.  All the inline code goodness of PHP, but with perl as the language.

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