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Conspiracy Theories

Name: Anonymous 2008-06-05 18:27

ITT We state consiracy theories.

I'll start:

The war in Iraq was started in an effort to strengthen the institution of the nation-state. Without national fears and desires to galvanize their populations, many "rogue states" would have already crumbled from within. Without anti-American hatred to unite them, their universally hated dictatorships would long ago have been overthrown by their restive populaces. Eurasia, Eastasia, and Oceania go to war so that Eurasia, Eastasia, and Oceania can continue to exist.

Name: Anonymous 2008-06-05 18:29

EVRYVAN IZ SEEKRITLY SOOSHALIST!!!!!!!!

Name: Anonymous 2008-06-05 18:32

>>2
Did you escape from the mental house again?

Name: Anonymous 2008-06-05 18:33

Doesn't it make sense, though? Every news show says that Iran's government would be a burnt cinder if the people weren't more afraid of the U.S. I think the same's true of a lot of other countries. Plus, I think the state department knows this shit. They're not fucking retarded.

Name: Libertaryan 2008-06-05 18:35

>>3
NO MAN, HE'S RIGHT! I READ IT ON THE INTERNETS SO IT MUST BE TRUE! BUSH IZ LEFT-WING SOSHALIST! DAT IZ LIBERTARYANIZM IF YOU DON'T AGREE UR A SOSHALIST TOO!

Name: Anonymous 2008-06-05 19:00

ITT fucking lameness.

Seriously. Make up a good one, for fuck's sake.

Name: Anonymous 2011-12-31 17:07

daddaa

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-01 15:47

OK

The illuminati are actually shadow fighters in a secret war against aliens from Gilise 586.

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-01 19:19

Here's one. Some people think that the exhaust that is created by jet planes (the white lines through the sky) is actually a mind-control agent used by the government to control the people these planes fly over. It's called the "Chemtrail Conspiracy" Ithink.

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-01 19:44

>>9 i think it wasn't about mind control but rather poisoning people to stop overpopulation

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-01 21:37

ok so chemtrails check it.

>dissipate in 2 minutes, permeating the area and going unseen.
  Normal behaviour of contrails

>hang in the air, failing to dissipate (much less reach ground level in any sort of concentration.
GUBBAMINT GUN GIT MEH

If these "chemtrails" are inentionally created by the government, it would be as a fun distraction from the real action, like a magician would use in a  trick

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-02 8:26

Black people are actualy productive members of society.

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-02 16:32

Conspiracy theories are started, and kept alive, to distract people from ever finding out the truth. These theories are also kept plural, and somewhat contradicting each other, for much the same reason.

Also, if someone ever does find out the truth, they get to drown in the noise. And no-one will believe them, for the same reason.

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-04 1:34

>>13
Yep, I reached the same conclusion.

Name: Anonymous 2012-01-04 1:34

>>13
Though I wouldn't say there is a giant conspiracy behind conspiracies.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-09 10:19

Commission Conspiracy : http://commissionconspiracy.com

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-10 18:49

9/11 was a very elaborate plan by the government.

They wanted to do these kinds of things before. Fool me once, shame on you... fool me twice...

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Operation_Northwoods

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-13 7:23

NSA will have access to Kinects of XBox One.

At least if I was in charge of NSA, I certainly would be pushing MS really hard to give me such thing.

And since XBox One requires daily connection, it can receive orders like "records everything from 3pm to 5pm" once PM.

Name: Anonymous 2013-06-13 13:39

>>18
sounds liek Orwell predicted even the smallest details.

Name: Anonymous 2013-07-06 18:51

>>18

I believe this will happen too. Besides, fuck console gaming. PC is much better.

Name: Anonymous 2013-07-07 13:59

>>9

Look up "Morgellons" (spelling?)  Syndrome.   The chem trails have synthetic, self replicating microfibers in them and some people's bodies reject them, causing this disease.

Name: Anonymous 2013-07-07 13:59

>>9

Look up "Morgellons" (spelling?)  Syndrome.   The chem trails have synthetic, self replicating microfibers in them and some people's bodies reject them, causing this disease.

Name: Anonymous 2013-07-07 21:59

>>21
Or socks have bits of loose fluff in them.

Name: Anonymous 2013-08-04 11:22

DOONESBURY FLASHBACK


Triff : "LOOK, DUKE, HEAR ME OUT. THE PLAN'S SOLID. FIRST WE STAGE A COUP. THEN WE BLOW UP THE U.S EMBASSY AND BLAME IT ON JIHADISTS...

THE AMERICANS WILL INVADE, OF COURSE, BUT THEY'LL GET BOGGED DOWN AND HAVE TO PROP ME UP FOR YEARS AS I GET RICH DIVERTING BILLIONS IN U.S. AID!"

Silence

Duke : "OKAY, SO THAT COULD WORK."

Triff : "COULD? DUKE, IT'S A PROVEN MODEL!"

8-3 Universal Uclick © 2012 G.B Trudeau

www.doonesbury.com

Name: Anonymous 2013-08-05 6:11

Countries don't need to go to war to do that.

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