TOO TIGHT!

I ended up alone with one of my gfs 13yo kid sisters. When she asked us what we had done during the time she was away, I told her we just watched television and nothing more, but I guess me blushing and she looking kinda flustered, kinda gave it away. ...so she found the perfect revenge. When me and my gf had sex later that evening, she came so hard, and squeezed my cock so tight, I was afraid she'd crush it. Afterwards my cock was a sore sight, all red and throbbing. She sure taught me a lesson: I'll never even think about doing it with anyone tighter than her. Jesus, that 13yo girl could probably have crushed my penis beyond all recognition.

This is Anon, an orgasm survivor.

Win. GTFI

http://dis.4chan.org/report/lounge/1226886760/f

>>3

Snitch.

>>3
"Hi, is this moot? Yeah, I'm calling because I'd like to report a topic, please. You see I was offended by the mentioning of a red, throbbing cock. Yes, I'll hold. ... Yes? the exact words? Let's see here... 'Afterwards my cock was a sore sight, all red and throbbing.' Yes, I'll hold. ... Jesus Christ, how long will this take? ... Yes, I'm still here. ... Yes, I'm a woman. ... How old I am? I'm 45. ... Yes, a mother of three, in fact. ... No, I was impregnated artifically. You see I've never found the right kind of man for me. ... No, of course I don't let my kids out of the house. What kind of mother would expose their kids to the filth of this world totally unprotected. ... What?!? There's nothing you can do?!? ... Yes, but there's red, throbbing cocks all over the place! ... Hello?? Moot?? Are you still there??"

>>5

Delicious copypasta

"When ME AND MY GF had sex "

Awww...

>>5
Stupid bitch.  All you have to do is use moot's code phrase "Blow Jays" and he'll do what you require.

>>8

Haha, I love that meme.

this is stupid, girls that age are not tight

　　　　　　　　　　∧＿∧　　　／￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣
　　　　　　　　　 （　´∀｀）　＜　watashi Mr. T Dancing in I Pity the Fool
　　　　　　　　／　　　　|　　　 ＼＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿
　　　　　　　/ 　　　 　 .|　　　　　
　　　　　　 / "⌒ヽ |.ｲ |
　　　＿＿ |　　　.ノ | || |＿＿
　 .　　　 ノく＿＿つ∪∪　　 ＼
　　　＿（（＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿_＼
　　 ￣￣ヽつ￣￣￣￣￣￣ | |￣
　　　＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿＿__| |
　　 ￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣￣| |

>>10
Not if they don't cum hard, but what will you do if they DO manage to pull off a triple orgasm of constriction on you like my gf did? *dramatic zoom.* What will you do...? You'll always live in fear, knowing that day might come when you'll have to call the fire brigade to pry what's left of your dick from her hungry jaws of death. *dramatic pause.* You'll never be the same after that. Goddammit I've seen it happen.

>>12
I WAS THAT HAMSTER!!!

>>13

*I* was that hamster.

>>14
*i* was that hamster.

*I* was that hamster.

>>14
>>15
You were that samefag
>>16
AND Clone

that hamster was my brother

sage

We may "be the hamster", but moot is the little girl.  FACT.

That is FACT, RedCream. But He hasn't spoken much. He says there's going to be a new news post very soon. Let's see what He has to say about "Durr Hurr, I'm fixing up 4chan better for you guys" yeah—right.

>>18

Back to /b/, please

>>17
Shut up, I'm being epic here.

Yeah, an epic failure.