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The cactuses in your world

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 1:25

Have you taken time to consider the cactuses in your world?  Consider them:  it is good to consider them.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 2:20

A cactus walks into a bar and the bartender says "We don't serve your kind here." and the cactus says - "Why not? I'm a cacti."

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 2:20

still waiting for the cactus board...it has been too long

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 3:49

cocktus

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 4:18

COCKTI!!!!

Name: Cactaur 2008-08-05 8:56


            *-*,
        ,*\/|`| \
        \'  | |'| *,
         \ `| | |/ )
          | |'| , /
          |'| |, /
        __|_|_|_|__
       [___________]
        |         |
        |         |
        |         |
        |_________|

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 12:23

Hmmmmmmmm...............
We have cactuses now an then trying to get over to page 10. ...Hey, that rhymed!

Name: Cactus 2008-08-05 12:30

Brother Cactaur, it's good to see you once again.

Name: Cactaur 2008-08-05 12:33

I was on a hunt for Mystical Mouse. He is wounded but escaped.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 12:49

I am the one you call Mystical Mouse. Prepare to be boarded.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 14:37

            *-*,
        ,*\/|`| \
        \'  ಠ_ಠ '| *,
         \ `| | |/ )
          | |'| , /
          |'| |, /
        __|_|_|_|__
       [___________]
        |         |
        |         |
        |         |
        |_________|

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 14:37

            *-*,
        ,*\/|`| \
        \'  ಠ_ಠ '| *,
         \ `| | |/ )
          | |'| , /
          |'| |, /
        __|_|_|_|__
       [___________]
        |         |
        |         |
        |         |
        |_________|

Name: MYSTICAL MOUSE 2008-08-05 14:46

Lurking... Seeking Vengeance....

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 15:54

/r/ cactus stories!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 17:39

We walked for hours before stopping for equally as long, and this is how it went on for months. She didn't notice but I certainly did, I was, however, too ashamed to say anything, so it went on. What, exactly, I was ashamed of, I don't know. Perhaps it was only misunderstood shyness, but that is immaterial, because I still could say nothing.
She said something that I misheard as immaterial once, and that made me ask myself where this word comes from. Not in an etymological sense, although that would interest me too, but the meaning. Such a superficial coating of beliefs scattered unevenly and entirely arbittrarly over almost everything always bothered me, so I made a mental note to look the word up on an etymological dictionary, and forgot about the whole thing - including to look it up. She wanted to carry on walking and I didn't want to object, so we set off again. I half wondered if we were getting slower, or if I was getting more tired. If we were getting faster, or if I was getting fitter, but a bird flew past and distracted me from the question.

We'd reach it one day, that was a given. I think.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 17:54

/r/ cactus stories!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 17:56

We cactused for hours before stopping for equally as long, and this is how it went on for months. She didn't cactus but I certainly did, I was, however, too ashamed to say anything, so it went on. What, exactly, I was ashamed of, I don't know. Perhaps it was only misunderstood cactus, but that is immaterial, because I still could say nothing.
She said cactus that I misheard as cactus once, and that made me ask myself where this word comes from. Not in an etymological sense, although that would interest me too, but the meaning. Such a superficial coating of beliefs scattered unevenly and entirely arbittrarly over almost cacti always bothered me, so I made a mental note to look the word up on an etymological dictionary, and forgot about the whole cactus - including to look it up. She wanted to carry on walking and I didn't want to object, so we set off again. I half wondered if we were getting slower, or if I was getting more tired. If we were getting faster, or if I was getting fitter, but a bird flew past and distracted me from the question.

We'd reach it one day, that was a given. Cacti think.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 18:04

/r/ more cactus stories!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 18:06

            *-*,
        ,*\/|`| \
        \'  ಠ_ಠ '| *,
         \ `| | |/ )
          | |'| , /
          |'| |, /
        __|_|_|_|__
       [___________]
       |           |
        \         /
         \       /
          \_____/

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 18:19


            *-*,
        ,*\/|`| \   -- /r/ more cactus stories!
        \'  ಠ_ಠ '| *,
         \ `| | |/ )
          | |'| , /
          |'| |, /
        __|_|_|_|__
       [___________]
       |           |
        \         /
         \       /
          \_____/

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-05 23:26

You heard the cactus, tell us about your first cactus.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 0:55

I used to collect cactii when I was younger, and they were cool coz I had all different looking ones, and they grew and needed repotting and eventually I moved and left the cacti and they kept growing until some of them died and the ones with white hair got shaggier and shaggier. I was charged with murder of a cactus by Our Lord And Saviour Brother Cactaur so am now facing death by over 9000 needles.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 1:21

I have a big cock.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 1:47

>>23
was it a cactus?

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 9:08

>>22
AWESOME STORY!
MORE!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 9:10

a friend of mine had one of those cheap pot cacti that he thought made his room look exotic. a bunch of us were over there once and thought it would be funny to put it under his pillow while he was in the bathroom, but he came back in as we were doing it.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 11:37

>>26
lol

Name: Cactus 2008-08-06 11:38

Arid Noir

The night air had a sting to it, like the wind-driven desert sands had felt against my succulent integument.  I squinted out the open window, past my leftarm needles, blearily trying to gauge the time from the moon's position.  That was a skill I had learned from many lonely hours in my youth, in the open air, my roots sandily ensconced, and my arms upraised to that same moon.

A sudden rapping alerted me.  Someone was knocking on my door.  And from the backlighting from the hallway, I could tell it was a dame.  But from her spiky curves, I could tell it was more than a dame.

It was trouble.

I'm Ned Dulle, Private Eye, cactus.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 11:51

This guy bought a cactus.
He watered it just as much as he did his other plants.
That was a fatal mistake. It doesn't need that much water, its a CACTUS.

It rotted and died.

The end.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 12:18

>>29
Thats so sad, I really feel for you my brother.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 12:22

>>30
Hold me. ;_;

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 13:11

I used to have a cactus in my room when I was young. I always peed in the pot when I was too lazy to go downstairs. My parents found out and told me to stop doing that.

Name: Cactus 2008-08-06 18:30

The urea in the urine was of some benefit.  Not too much, however.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-06 19:01

more storys

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-11 11:14

moa

Name: Cactus 2008-08-11 12:58

Lest cactii fade from this world, yea verily, let there be MOAR cactus stories.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-11 13:50

I was once married to this cactus bitch
I caught the whore in bed with my brother
I forgave my brother because she was a hot piece of cactus and couldn't blame him
But I watered that cheating slut until she rotted and died.

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-11 15:18

>>37
Great stuff!

Name: MYSTICAL MOUSE 2008-08-11 15:26

This thread is DELICIOUS!!

Excuse me while I prepare to dine...

Name: Cactaur 2008-08-11 16:08

... eating your own innards after I slice your belly?

Name: Cactus 2008-08-11 20:01

>>39
Away, Mystical Mouse!  This thread tisn't for thee to regard!  Get thee hence!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-12 2:08

I am here to spread the word about our new Lord and Savious Mystical Mouse. Our old gods, the Cactus gods and brother Cactaur have failed us, it is time to recant our faith and embrace our new saviour, Mystical Mouse. All hail Mystical Mouse!!

Name: Anonymous 2008-08-12 3:11

>>42
well that's not a very cactus thing to say.

Name: Cactaur 2008-08-12 9:06

>>42
Your kind is not welcome here.

Name: MYSTICAL MOUSE 2008-08-12 9:09

Come, my children, be not afraid...

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