Once, when I was maybe 9 or 10, I was hiking up a mountain with my dad and some friends and slipped. I fell right into a cactus next to the path. I had to climb out of the cactus and back up onto the trail. I think I had over 20 needles in my legs.
The cactus saved me though. If I didn't fall into the cactus I would have fallen down the whole mountain, which would have hurt a lot more.
Yesh, my favorite cactus story was about a long hike in the woods my boyfriend and I came across a field of cacti (the little round ones), and noticed that they looked kinda familiar. So my boyfriend prick's his finger on a few of the needles and sure enough, it's peoti. So, as a joke, I say, "Hey, why don't we try putting the smaller ones up our butts for shits and giggles?" The crazy man agrees and picks up a few and puts them up his ass until he can't get any more in. So, he's bleedin from his ass, he's as high as the moon, singing and dancing, spraying his shit and piss everywhere. So, I ask him to give me some love and he gets down on his hands and knees and sucks my cock like he's got a craving for it. Just as I'm about to cum into the back of his throat, the son-of-a-bitch puts one of those fucking cacti right up my shoot and I blasted him right in the back of his throat. He started choking, I'm screaming about my ass in pain and starting to feel better, he's spewing out cum and lunch, and if it couldn't get any worse, fuck-nuts stumbles towards me and we both fall ass-naked into this harry patch of cacti. 36 hours later, we are life-flighted out to a hostpital, my buddy is nowhere to be found, I've got cactus up the ass, I'm high as the fucking stars, it was one giant collossul grade-a fucking nightmare. After that, we decided that we would never do that again as long as we live. My friend died three days later laying in that damned patch surrounded and filled with cactus right up into his small intestine.