Name: Anonymous 2007-10-02 19:14 ID:4CBZVoDf
What ever happened to the powerful and wrathful God of the Bible? I've looked for Him, but a cuddly, weepy wimp of an imposter -- the Oprah Jesus -- has replaced Him. Apparently, an angry, judgmental God was "testing negative" in an America that prefers to act upon its cherished self-esteem with neither judgment nor consequence. After all, what place does the concept of adultery have in a country that has exchanged the immorality of the act of cheating with the victimhood of the "disease" of sex addiction?
A hundred years ago, if you succumbed to immorality, you provoked God's anger. Now, you simply hurt His easily bruised feelings. New Age "Jesus is Love" Hallmark Greeting Card Christians run around talking about a God who never asks the inconvenient. Instead, He's taken to crying while saying "I love you so much" like your worst codependent nightmare.
You see, through the resourcefulness of American marketing (and our singular ingenuity for making everything all about us), God has suddenly become helplessly obsessed with His love for us, as if He spent the past decades having His power and morality bludgeoned out of Him by incessant sensitivity training and anger management. So, if you do something evil, instead of calling you into account and sending you to Hell, He meekly sits back and cries like a drunken drama queen watching "Terms of Endearment."
Well, the REAL Jesus and I are absolutely sick of these lying heretics who have embraced their New Age brand of Painless Christianity. Frankly, they make Jesus vomit. And I have called upon the Chairman of the Landover Baptist Salvation Evaluation Committee, Brother Harry Hardwick, a Biblical Scholar, True Christian and man who rather devastating fills out a dark, custom-tailored suit, to help these fake-Christians to reject their Oprah Jesus and get back on a sound Biblical footing of believing in a God who will torture them at the drop of a hat.
I am calling upon all True Christians to help! If you know a "Jesus is Love" Fake Christian, you can send them the letter that Brother Harry Hardwick has written to wake them up to the wrath and anger of the real God -- the one in the Bible! With your help, I feel a victory coming on! Praise!
A hundred years ago, if you succumbed to immorality, you provoked God's anger. Now, you simply hurt His easily bruised feelings. New Age "Jesus is Love" Hallmark Greeting Card Christians run around talking about a God who never asks the inconvenient. Instead, He's taken to crying while saying "I love you so much" like your worst codependent nightmare.
You see, through the resourcefulness of American marketing (and our singular ingenuity for making everything all about us), God has suddenly become helplessly obsessed with His love for us, as if He spent the past decades having His power and morality bludgeoned out of Him by incessant sensitivity training and anger management. So, if you do something evil, instead of calling you into account and sending you to Hell, He meekly sits back and cries like a drunken drama queen watching "Terms of Endearment."
Well, the REAL Jesus and I are absolutely sick of these lying heretics who have embraced their New Age brand of Painless Christianity. Frankly, they make Jesus vomit. And I have called upon the Chairman of the Landover Baptist Salvation Evaluation Committee, Brother Harry Hardwick, a Biblical Scholar, True Christian and man who rather devastating fills out a dark, custom-tailored suit, to help these fake-Christians to reject their Oprah Jesus and get back on a sound Biblical footing of believing in a God who will torture them at the drop of a hat.
I am calling upon all True Christians to help! If you know a "Jesus is Love" Fake Christian, you can send them the letter that Brother Harry Hardwick has written to wake them up to the wrath and anger of the real God -- the one in the Bible! With your help, I feel a victory coming on! Praise!