Name: Anonymous 2007-09-04 1:35 ID:PjLmFkFY
Tonight was awful. Just thinking of all my friends I saw today, women in hand and how they are loved. And out of those, the ones who break up, at least they HAD something and can sum it up to experience on how to be a better partner. I havent even touched the opposite sex for years, the last time I flirted was around 3.5 years ago, and after i found out my advances(non sexual advances mind you) made this girl feel uncomfortable, i stopped flirting for good because im too afraid it will happen again. Im pretty pathetic I guess. I ruin alot of friendships cause I try to take it to the next level, and then tehy think im selfish and just want to be friends cause of that, but its not true. Hell, i like a girl right now but ive vowed NEVER to tell her how I feel, no matter how many times she tells me she loves this guy and wants to go out with him and wants me to be happy with her..and i feel the opposite i feel like trash and I feel empty, like none of my attempts matter and that im doing something wrong that all women smell when they meet me. Tomorrow I'll wake up and not be as depressed, but im sure sometime again, it will return. I think about this day, night, morning, etc. I've got a lot to give, I've been patient.....but I cant go on living the life of a single man, and I definately see myself like this many many years down the road. I cant wake up every morning and feel this way until Im whole and have found her.