All I want is...

...a hot girlfriend that I can have lots of sex with.

I'm fucking horny all the time, jacking off 4 to 5 times a day, hard ons and wet dreams over waitresses, you name it, its rediculous. why do they act so damn sexy when they're not even wanting you?

jerking off all the time is ok when you're a teenager but i'm 27 this month, time for some ass i can call my own, any advice??

Be jerk to them. The really hot ones usually like that or you could resort to rape out of desperation but I would not recommend it cause if you get caught and sent to jail they will toss the shit out of your salad.

That and you could get some self-help tapes or look to google for pick advice.

Your 27 so go to the college near you and pick up some girls or just talk to some to learn how to pick up girls.
 I normally heard the girls in my dorm talking about how most of their 'mistake' one night stands were older guys.