Social spasticity

Hay /Lounge/. I wanted to ask /b/, but I'm sure you'll be fine instead.

I'm interested in having an online fling after recently getting out of an abusive "real life" relationship. I am intensely, pathetically infatuated with this one guy I sort of know from a forum, but I'm a spaz at talking to people I don't already talk to regularly and that makes it hard to start anything with him.

Pooper, barrel roll, an hero, etc. have not worked so far.

What do I do, /lounge/? Should I just gtf over it? :(

E-mail him?

>>2
I don't have his email address and it would feel reeeeeally weird asking since he barely even knows I exist.

Maybe that's my problem - I'm a coward. :P

He probably goes by the "TITS or GTFO" policy too.

>>4
I'd give him tits if he asked. It's conveying that thought without making him think I'm kinda creepy that's the problem - it's a relatively... er... civilized forum, and that kind of thing doesn't generally happen there.

^ In retrospect, that's probably a foreign concept on 4chan, in which case I'm in the wrong place. XD

>>3
Well, doesn't the forum have some sort of private-messaging system? If so, just say something to him.

It isn't so much that I need a way to contact him as it is that I'm too much of a spaz to know what to say to him in order to gain his interest. Guess I didn't really make that very clear originally.

In general, though, what I'm gathering here is that I'm overcomplicating things in my own little mind by stressing over what exactly to say, correct?

Jesus Chris, it's not that hard. Just say "hi" or something.

>>9
I tried that. He tends to ignore people who don't have something specific to say, I've noticed.

Ah well, thanks for your feedback, /lounge/!

>>10
Then say something specific! >:( Maybe he'd pay attention to you more if you weren't so difficult.

Erm. I have no clue what specific thing would be appropriate to say in the situation.

In other words, I have no clue how not to be difficult because I'm basically too stupid to understand normal social conduct.

Do you want to ride him like a wild pony?

>>12
So you're just gonna wait for him to say something to you, eh? Oh wait, although you may be somewhat emotionally attached to him, he barely knows you and wouldn't think of talking to you. But you have a way of contacting him! Here is an oppurtunity you can take advantage of and hopefully get to know this guy more, but instead you think of all the possible negative outcomes and decide you'd rather not say anything. Tell him how you feel, even if it could possibly lead to an awkward moment. Come on, what's the worst that can happen? I mean, correct me if I'm wrong, but you said you only know him via the internet on some forum. Does it really matter if you say something stupid on an online forum where no one knows your real life identity? So what if your e-rep may tarnish? You can always start off fresh by making a creating a new alias. If this is how you react to online social situations I'd hate to see how you you'd handle real-life ones. Oi.

If you still can't bring yourself to talking to someone on the 'net, seek counselling to try and overcome your social problems. Avoiding social interaction isn't a good thing, you know.

I do see a psychiatrist, actually. I don't deny being really really fucked-up.

No second aliases allowed on the forum in question (VERY strictly enforced), and I like it there too much to risk it on some guy I barely even know.

I've tried to talk to him. It hasn't worked. It's not that big a deal in the end. I'll get over it.

You're missing the point.

Say hi. I like you. Let's fuck. Get it out of your system. Then move on. And if not, email me at supercra.... [bang! someone shoots him in the head]

>>16
Okay... Thanks for trying to help, at least. Odds are the point will sink in eventually.

>>17
Haha, nah, that'd get me banned there. XD

If you've made it clear you're really a girl, he may respond favorably even if what you say isn't interesting. Hot pics always help.

show him tits or he'll tell you to gtfo
so post tits or gtfo

>>20
setting another good example

I'm interested in having an online fling after recently getting out of an abusive "real life" relationship.
U SOUND TEH SMRT

I am intensely, pathetically infatuated with this one guy I sort of know from a forum
ALSO MAEKS U SOUND SMRT

but I'm a spaz at talking to people I don't already talk to regularly and that makes it hard to start anything with him.
Can't make much fun of you there, since that happens to people. Best thing is to do what they say to do in real life. Be yourself, talk about stuff you like, and if the person isn't interesting in what YOU like then YOU wouldn't want to spend time with them anyways.

It's not that hard you know.

One more point though. "I've tried to talk to him. It hasn't worked. It's not that big a deal in the end. I'll get over it," I doubt you will. Jumping from one "crush" to the next and going all hyper over some new guy that you barely know is signs of immaturity. Kill that off. That's a step to becoming an adult. And I do mean to kill that immaturity off, because if it doesn't go away on it's on you really do need to start thinking consciously about how you behave. You need to stop letting your emotions dominate your life.

Being an in an "abusive 'real life' relationship" is proof already that you need help. If a person is abusive even ONCE dump their ass. Putting up with it even for a short time is completely a waste of your time.

If I can say "Eh, I don't like the way you're acting, it's being abusive" and forget about them so can you. It's called being an adult.

tit or GTFO

>>22
Thanks, but I already know I'm dumb as rocks. Efforts to fix that have been in vain.

I'm completely aware it's just an immature bounceback from my being used to having a guy around and suddenly not, hence why I'll get over it. I honestly don't develop these stupid crushes on people that often - the last one was a full year before the guy I just dumped.

I mentioned earlier in the thread that I'm seeing a psychiatrist already. I know I need help and I'm getting it.

technically all pych's think we're "in need of help" - how else do they stay in business?

remember - all humans want the 3 basics in life - sex/love, food and shelter - take care of those 3 and the rest fall into place.

u sound like a awesome chick - dont let the shit get u down - ... damn ... i'm channeling dr. phil again *bang*

that or tits ;)

;)

;)