Name: Anonymous 2006-12-19 0:09
hello 4chan, i'm deaf. not completely deaf, but severely deaf. to give you an example of how deaf i am, i have to ask people to repeat themselves every 15-30 seconds or so, depending on the person, and this is with hearing aids on. and, even though i can 'hear' movies and music, i can't understand the words, even if the volume is at its maximum. its as if the movies/music were filmed/recorded in another language.
since isn't grouphug, i'm going to skip most of my sob story. in summary, my hearing loss has chipped away at my self-confidence until right now i have about no self-confidence at all. i'd watch people have conversations, and i'd make an honest effort to try and join the conversation, but i can't hear them at all. i just stay silent, staring blankly at their lips, trying to comphrehend what they're saying. i've tried, and tried, and i'm still trying, but i just can't hear. so right now, i'm depressed, emotionless, and basically a fucking zombie. i'm on the edge of suicide; i want to die, but i dont want to be the one responsible for my own death. i do have a few good friends, and they know what i'm going through, but i only have limited contact with them (ex. my best friend moved to china a few years ago, my best female friend started college early). so yeah. i've tried telling people that i'm deaf, but they dont believe me, probably because nobody believes each other anymore, thanks to the fact that being sarcastic is the coolest thing ever right now. girls get turned off by the fact that i keep asking them to repeat themselves every 15 seconds. and i could go on, but i'll spare you my bitchings and shit.
so anyways, how do i deal with this? are there any deaf people here on 4chan? btw, i'm not emo or a nerd or anything. i dress normally, and even though the interweb and counterstrike is the only place where i feel almost close to being equal with other people, i force myself away from the computer if i stay on for more than 5 hours. so, 4chan, enlighten me with your wisdom and advice.
since isn't grouphug, i'm going to skip most of my sob story. in summary, my hearing loss has chipped away at my self-confidence until right now i have about no self-confidence at all. i'd watch people have conversations, and i'd make an honest effort to try and join the conversation, but i can't hear them at all. i just stay silent, staring blankly at their lips, trying to comphrehend what they're saying. i've tried, and tried, and i'm still trying, but i just can't hear. so right now, i'm depressed, emotionless, and basically a fucking zombie. i'm on the edge of suicide; i want to die, but i dont want to be the one responsible for my own death. i do have a few good friends, and they know what i'm going through, but i only have limited contact with them (ex. my best friend moved to china a few years ago, my best female friend started college early). so yeah. i've tried telling people that i'm deaf, but they dont believe me, probably because nobody believes each other anymore, thanks to the fact that being sarcastic is the coolest thing ever right now. girls get turned off by the fact that i keep asking them to repeat themselves every 15 seconds. and i could go on, but i'll spare you my bitchings and shit.
so anyways, how do i deal with this? are there any deaf people here on 4chan? btw, i'm not emo or a nerd or anything. i dress normally, and even though the interweb and counterstrike is the only place where i feel almost close to being equal with other people, i force myself away from the computer if i stay on for more than 5 hours. so, 4chan, enlighten me with your wisdom and advice.