Top ten reasons to grow a beard

10 Harder to see face on low resolution surveillance video
9 Prove a point to your girlfriend about shaving
8 It's worth two units for your philosophy major
7 Your name is John Beard and you're tired of living a lie
6 Rogaine addiction
5 President of the Viking student association
4 President of the female Viking student association
3 Pink chin the pirate sounds too pussy
2 When you were five a razor killed your father
1 It's cold. And you're a child molester

1.  I hate shaving
2.  When I shave too close I get infected face
3.  I'm lazy
4.  I can't get a good shave in the first place because my whiskers are like steel cables, black, and under a layer of dried skin