Quickest and most sure way to die?

Quick explaination of the situation. Very poor health since I was a kid, can't even manage school (I'm an adult now though). Hardly able to work or support myself. I might as well be crippled. Got involved with someone who got me through the years and I find out she's been raped several times and ended up pregnant. My family sucked ass and now hers is going to be like that. She has no more fight left in her to make something of her life.

I've considered my options logically and emotionally for the past few years. I think it would be best if I went to where she is and made sure they didn't do any more to her, but here's the problem. They'll likely kill me for getting involved. Which of course in my situation isn't all that worrysome, she'll at leats know someone stood up to them for her. But I'm still scared of how they're going to do it. Let's just call them violent people who you don't want to mess with. So I want to know what there is I can use to ensure I have a quick death when they come to get me. Like pills or whatever.

Yeah I know how stupid this sounds, but I figure 4chan's a good place to go for advice on insanely stupid situations. Such as this one. Remember I'm useless to society this way, I can't support myself. I've been trying for years, I don't like relying on the help of others. So before I'm stabbed to death by a gang, what can I bring with me, since it'll involve travelling. Any homemade chemicals or something?

TL;DR Best/quickest way to die quickly with no chance of being "saved"?

Decapitation?

Go to Iraq!

>>2
By lightsaber.

>>1
You chicken-shit. What's the point of going to save this woman if the only thing you're going to do when you get into trouble is suicide? You didn't help her at all! You just made her witness your violent, crappy death, and she'll hate you for being such a pussy.

Die like a man, and try to get her to a safe place or something!

Move to america.

That place is filled with violent savages.

>>6
lol troll

>>1
Put on a KKK hood and go to central Harlem, or the equivalent.  You'll be dead in the blink of an eye, those niggers sure are violent.

Oh, I now read the post.

1) Kill them before they kill you.
2) If you have to die, set up a big ass bomb to take you all out.

>>1
Oh yeah, and you'll really want them to kill you, because otherwise they won't be prosecuted and raped anally by Bubba for the rest of their lives.

why dont you just join the army?

No, join Al Qa-eda!

>>10
Damn I wish I had now. I'd know a lot more if I was a soldier or something. Or >>11 sounds good too. They come with bombs strapped to them, right? That'd certainly be handy for me. Too bad I can't get my hands on a gun or take one with me where I go.
>>5
I know it's throwing away my life, but I really don't have much to live for, considering my health and money situation. I basically do nothing but drag my friends and family down because of being so helpless. I've had to drop out of school and college a few times.

I know how idiotic it sounds, I've been going over ways to help myself and her for the past 3 years. If I can get in their face and tell them off they might leave her alone. And if she knows I stood up for her and I disappear she'll be able to admit they're dangerous like everyone tells her and stay away from them.

CRAAAAWWWWWWLLLLINGGGG IN MY SKIIIIIIIIIIIIIIN

find someone who has morgellons and eat their scabs

1) get aids
2) get close to your victim
3) slit your throat and spray blood all over your victim
4) ???
5) profit

get really drunk and then eat lots of acetaminophen-containing pills (highly available over the counter). you'll die within seconds. honest.

>>16
I'll make a note of that, thanks. (it's weird saying thanks for that).
>>15
Or better yet, have gay sex and give them all aids! Because we all know gangs are always full of gay guys.

This is >>5.
Now >>8's suggestion is made of win and awesome. Go with what he said.

what ever you do make sure it shows up on the news. Implicate 4chan for bonus points.

Let's look at your options:
1. Noose.  The old traditional methods.  A favorite of medieval era and Abu Ghraib prisoners.  Just need a rope or torn bed sheet. Cause of death is usually cervical dislocation or suffication.

2. Seppuku. A favorite of Japanese culture.  Good for anyone who has lost honor.  Simply knife is all that is needed.  Cause of death is either major organ failure of excessive lost of blood.

3. Sleeping pill overdose.  Favorite of celebrities and models.  Not particularly effective since hospital intervention can usually save these people.

4. Slashing of wrist.  Favorite of weak suicidal females.  Bloody and slow.   Most practishioner usually get scared and chicken out. 

5. Gun.  The american favorite.  With guns so prolific, a simply shot through the brain stem effectively and efficiently ends one's own life.

Here it is, all the common methods of suicide.  I hope you found the guide useful.  Let us know if you choose any of the fore-mentioned methods. :D

>>17
Following >>16 is more likely to cause a very slow and very painfull death.

>>20
Most sleeping pills won't kill you alone, especially not the benzodiazepine ones which are the most commonly prescribed these days. Slashing wrists doesn't work. Gun is a definite winner. Fast, painless and very unlikely to fail. A shotgun is preferable but a powerful handgun will work too

>>20
1.  Can (and does) go wrong too easily, in which case incredible pain and paraplegia etc. instead of death
2.  Again, Incredibly painful way to die, and unless you have a second handy to decapitate you, can take a long time to die
3.  My sister's a nurse, and you just wouldn't believe the number of idiots who try this and fail, but damage themselves irreparably instead.  Only an option for the stupid.
4.  No further comment
5.  Not as easily done as you might think, quite often results in brain damage, shattered jaw etc. without doing the job.  Only sure way is to get someone else to do it to you.


>>1  If you really want suggestions, then google it - there are even newsgoups out there for suiciders.

Don't forget bridge jumping and self immolation.  Great ways to get attention and your name in the newspaper.

Ever see the movie 'Taxi Driver'? Do what Robert De Niro did in that movie and blast the bad guys away. If you go down then you succede at that, but if you live you accomplished something and everyone will appreciate it. And you'll have a gun, so you can always suicide when you are done.

  Choke yourself.

>>24

If you think you're going to die anyway at the hands of someone else, screw them as much as they can. Kill them or cripple them, no pity for the wanton killer. Their buddies probably won't understand it, but at least there'll be one fucker less on the face of this already defiled planet. So I'd say get the most lethal thing you can handle and cripple/kill/injure as many of them as you can. Perhaps it sounds too extreme, but what about suicide bombing? In the middle east it works wonders. If they corner you and you activate a motherfucking bomb, they're all gone.

On the other hand: if you can manage to get her out of there... Do so, fast. And nother thing, will she be able to withstand your death? Because if you suicide to kill the ones who fucked her life, but she suicides in turn... perhaps it's pointless?

~Psiweapon

>>26
you don't need to sign all your posts you attention whore, the name field is enough

take out rapers with a gun
feel good.
shot yourself and die with a smile.

>>12
what? she's with these guys by choice cos she doesnt believe how dangerous they are, despite the rapings?
why throw yourself away for someone so obviously retarded

>>1

Just ask yourself -- What Would Jeffrey Beaumont Do?

>>1

TAKE IT UP THE ASS BY GEORGE ZIMMER

LMAO

HI. I'M GEORGE ZIMMER, FOUNDER AND CEO OF MEN'S WEARHOUSE.  LOVE IS IDEALISTIC BULLSHIT, AS THE PANCAKES ARE OF LEMON FLAVORING AND I HOLD A LARGE CARROT, WHICH I STAB IDIOTS WITH IN THE EYE AND IT FORCES THEIR HEADS TO CATCH FIRE. BUT IN A WORLD FULL OF PEDOPHILES, ONE THING IS CERTAIN-THAT YOU WILL CUT YOURSELF AND DIE, EMOFAG. YOU'RE GONNA GET RAPED. I GUARANTEE IT.

>>1
Come right out and say it. Your friend is an IBO in the Quixtar family.

Go Columbine

why dont you just steal her into the night, leave a note with her signature on it saying what you're doing (so they know it's not a kidnapping) and leave the state.

Lean off the edge of a building, holding on to something so you dont fall, then sedate yourself

>>36
I like that idea.
And all the ideas of taking the bitches with you.
No matter what you do, get it on film and make sure someone posts it on the interw3b.

>>1
If you're gonig to die, grab a weapon, kill them, then kill yourself, problem solved rite

>>1
Very poor health since I was a kid, can't even manage school (I'm an adult now though). Hardly able to work or support myself. I might as well be crippled.

Are you Brian Peppers?

gun