your life goals

few people divulge them for fear of mockery.. but you can tell it to the supportive comm of 4chan!!

here's mine: graduate, trek to some exotic place where english is spoken, find a job or marry someone rich, do some social climbing, live in a gigantic apartment and then die relatively young. and write a book under a pseudonym with arcane internet references in it.

ZOMG MASTER PLAN DO NOT READ!

1     Finish year 12, move into a rich and reasonably heavily populated suburb.

2    Find a vacant house. Squat

3    For the next six years, leech of Centrelink. Also walk in parks, contemplating the meaning of life without a care in the world, write a book about how awesome it is to have screwed society in such a manner, and stand on street corners in Bhuddist robes, selling enlightenment to any stupid enough to buy it.

4    After those six years have passed, and the house is in my possession by law, sell it and use the money to publish my book. Live on money from book sales.

5    With publicity from book, start a religion. “Religion” may or may not be equal to “Personal army of subservient lackeys”.

6    Delegate army into subgroups as follows.

6.1    World of Warcraft henchmen.
6.2    Charity workers. Also known as my PR department.
6.3    Political Pawns. The name says it all. I want to be able to influence the global community to some extent.
6.4    Start my own food company. Like Home Brand, except without the cardboard and the gay.
6.5    Team of musicians. They can play anything from techno to classical.
6.6    Team of scientists. They make the messed up things I dream up reality.
6.7    Team of nerds that will hack into anything I want.
6.8    Team of lawyers. I’m going to need it.

7    10:51pm on the 11th of June, 2016 – Get drunk in a bar. Because it came into my head to do so ten years ago.

I made this all up last night. When I fail at life, I'm going to do it.